t0ri Posted January 14, 2010 Posted January 14, 2010 My boyfriend have been seeing each other for about 3 months, and this is his first serious relationship. He told me today I'm his first love, which got me thinking. I feel like first loves never last. Maybe this will be different because I've been in a serious, long-term relationship before, and he's had plenty of experience with girls, just not on very serious terms. His longest so called "relationship" was 3 months, and he tells me he's never felt like he does about anyone like he does me, not even close. I've never felt a connection like this, so I'm really hoping for the best for us. I'm willing to risk myself, having gotten badly hurt last year, because this is all worth it. So anyway, do you think the odds are not in my favor of us lasting since I'm his "first love?" I'm not worried about it, I'm enjoying and appreciating what I have while I have it, but I just wanted some opinions on first loves! Thanks!
alphamale Posted January 14, 2010 Posted January 14, 2010 So anyway, do you think the odds are not in my favor of us lasting since I'm his "first love?" you are basically his "starter" relationship...you'll be his teacher and him teh student
sagetalk Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 Well, you could always tell him to break up with you, go date another girl for 4 months, break up with her, start dating you again,then you have nothing to worry about . In short, you are over thinking way too much.
skydiveaddict Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 If you like this guy go for it. You're worrying too much.
alphamale Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 If you like this guy go for it. You're worrying too much. i don't agree sda
skydiveaddict Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 i don't agree sda why not? she'll never know unless she goes for it
USMCHokie Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 My ex had this same exact concern about me...she told me early on that she was afraid that I'd leave because I might find that she wasn't what I wanted because I didn't have enough experience with relationships...perhaps I didn't know what I wanted and didn't want...who knows... She ended up leaving me... ....but ultimately I'm glad for it...not because I didn't love her, but I still had so much to learn...I think I would have been MUCH worse off if we were still together and I hadn't experienced these past ~6 months of healing... Just a few thoughts from his perspective...I have many more if you care to hear them...let me know...
OceanTropic Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 Love is love. Why should chronology matter?
Skump Posted January 15, 2010 Posted January 15, 2010 (edited) So anyway, do you think the odds are not in my favor of us lasting since I'm his "first love?" I have some news for you: the odds on any random relationship aren't that good. First "loves" tend to fail disproportionately because: 1) the love birds in question are almost invariably young and stupid. 2) see the first sentence in this post. I'd take odds any day on a "first true love" between two 35 year olds lasting over a "fourth true love" between 18 year olds. People seriously, seriously, seriously, seriously, seriously, seriously overcomplicate relationships. If two individuals are really compatible, and they follow Bill and Ted's philosophy of "be excellent to one another," their union is as liable to work out as any other, external pressures aside. Failing either of those two criteria, the union is likely to fail. Simple as that. Edited January 15, 2010 by Skump
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