J_89 Posted January 13, 2010 Posted January 13, 2010 (edited) I was seeing a guy for 3 years. At the end of last year, he broke it off with me. It was tough as hell, but I stayed strong and got offered a job abroad for 7 months - I took it. He called me a month later, said he regretted his decision every day and begged for me back, naturally I was cautious but he apologized profusely and told me he loved me more than he'd ever loved someone and would do anything to get me back and he'd wait. I took him. It was assumed we would see other people for the 7 months- he told me it was OK as long as I kept him informed as to who I was seeing. As I didn't trust him 100%, I let him do the majority of contacting and he contacted me/called/emailed/texted at least twice a week. He constantly told me he loved me and missed me. He seemed to think I had a boyfriend and said it was OK but begged me to tell him the truth. I didn't have one. He was still always so sweet, romantic and great until perhaps August. At that point, I got the chance for an extension. He told me that if I took it, it would be over because he loves me but misses having a gf. I said that was OK. However, I took it but just for another month. He still acted like we were a couple but told me: "I have no need to call it a relationship". I broke it off. 2 weeks later he told me he missed me and would come out to see me - he wanted to kiss me etc. He didn't want to die with us never seeing each other and kissing each other again. Another 2 weeks later, we had a big discussion about it, him basically trying to back out of the relationship but saying he did have feelings. I told him I'd be back in a month but he still seemed reluctant - he told me, you can be anything you want - friend, lover, girlfriend or wife, but I won't be in a LDR. I told him: it won't be. He seemed to just want sex. When I came home, he wasn't there, but he was away on holiday/vacation for a month. When he got back, he contacted me very infrequently and didn't seem over-enthusiastic (but not rude) about seeing me. I told him we'd just be friends, he agreed, but became more rude. It seemed like HE was angry at ME.. he'd come online just when I was online, hang around and wait for me to say hi, and then when I'd leave (turn my status to invisible) he'd become invisible too. He'd give one word answers instead of the full ones that he'd used to - but it didn't seem like he was ignoring me, rather that he was purposefully doing it. So, I just ignored all messages from him that were one-word. So then, he has been back to IMing me pleasantly 3 times a week. He calls me "hon" "baby" and wants to know how I am and what's new in my life. Extremely pleasant and caring - always wanting to know what is going on and hoping that I'm doing well. I generally ignore him still though. It's crushed me and killed me. How could I have let him back into my life for another year after last time? It made me feel so bad. But I decided to stay strong and forget it. I found the strength to block him and was doing well. It's been the second time I've had to do this since knowing him, but I've done it and I was recovering. I was determined to make a better life for myself without him. He e-mailed me a week ago wanting to know what was new in my life, he told me his was full of "parties, girls and working hard - life's good". He's still calling me hon/baby. I never emailed him or asked him to tell me this. I felt it was cruel and hurtful and just made me feel 1,000,000 times worse. I don't know what I did to deserve it. If he was trying to make me jealous, that's the only possible explanation.. if not, why would someone be that cruel? Is he just being cruel or can't work out his feelings? Nobody could be that stupid to email their ex and tell them that. Edited January 13, 2010 by J_89
DiscoChick Posted January 13, 2010 Posted January 13, 2010 He is an idiot and is trying to make you jealous because he knows you still have feelings for him. Delete him from your life and move on. Spare yourself further heartache.
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