fresh-one Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 Little backround, went out with this women for 4 years (lived with her a year and a half) then broke up in october. Reason for break up according to her is someday she loved me and other days she hated me, Since the breakup I havent seen her or spoke to her until this weekend wich is about 4 months since any contact. Sunday morning I woke up to a text that said "happier now?" i wasn't strong enough to not answer so we got to talking. She tells me all about some guy she met thats in the navy who was home for 3 weeks and in those weeks she fell for him and now shes waiting 6 months for him until he returns home and then there planing on moving to some navy bas in florida. (all her family is her in jersey). So anyway im kind of an emotionless person so hearing this didn't hurt just made me think this persons got a screw loose. i just wished them luck and gave her my hinest opinion. So the next day she texted me again and we got to talking and she said she wants to see me and "snuggle" with me cause she misses her boyfriend and shes lonley. so being a normal guy i say sure come over, later that night around the time she was supposed to come over she texted saying she couldn't handle seeing me cause she didnt want to hurt her boyfriends feelings or loose him. so i said no biggie i dont wanna be the one to ruin ur new relationship. So all im wondering is whats up with the mind games? and how much pain do you think she must be in to use this guy to runaway? any thoughts?
sean1970 Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 Dude..? About face and run. Then keep running.
bananaboat11 Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 ...if it were me and I felt like you... I'd probably just go back to NC. I'd say, "I'm sorry... good luck with your life. Glad to hear things are going well, but rekindling anything is a lost cause right now and I honestly don't see this friendship working at this time. Good luck..." But this isn't my situation... so you must do what you wish. I'd suggest continuing NC... this can only be toxic for you, unless you BOTH are willing to make it work.
duece22022 Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 it sounds like your doing good and your over her. no contact sounds like the right idea. she s a little crazy. i think she might want a booty call. and if your o.k. with it, i say go for it!. but if this will get u thinking about her again than just keep doing the no contact. she is just trying to get you jealous by mentioning her b/f.
gaudi Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 I didn't get what her text meant. Did she mean she was happier now ?? Or was she asking you if you were happier now ?? Either way if you don't feel stongly about her, and don't really care for what she gets upto. Then I would say leave her be. you don't want to be the cause for her new relationship to be in trouble. But I don't really think the NC applies in this case. It's more for when you want to get over someone. I don't think NC matters (from your POV) if you're not really bothered about her.
prayingshecomesback Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 Dude..? About face and run. Then keep running. LOL You beat me to it. Listen buddy.... RUN FAR FAR FAR AWAY and dont ever look back. This girl is CRAZY. Dont be her doormat anymore. You deserve better than this.
DustySaltus Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 She breaks up with you and ask you if you are happier now? Sounds like my ex. She probably knows that she screwed up a good thing and just started sniffing around again with this stupid text. But she probably has too much pride to swallow it. Instead she mentions this "sailor" who may or may not even exist to try and reinforce her own insecurities. Stick to NC. She probably realized that the grass isn't greener on the other side because someone who is dedicated to their BF would NEVER do something like this. You got off easy my friend. Find someone that loves you everyday, without prejudice.
HLP234 Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 Same type of behavior happened when my ex and I went on our break. Oh well, just go NC and forget her. If you want to be her friend and have no feelings left for her than do what you want. But I suggest you don't talk to her anymore. The military relationships rarely work out..my friend was at sea for a year and all these dudes were messing around with women in other countries, while their gf/wifes were doing the same at home. Let her live her life and find out the hard way. She will most likely come talking to you again but you have to realize that unless she miraculously changes one day, nothing can work out right now.
ann09 Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 She sounds like a nut. She wanted to snuggle with YOU because she was missing her boyfriend?? Huh?? Really? I miss someone everyday of my life but there would never be a substitute for him!!
Author fresh-one Posted January 12, 2010 Author Posted January 12, 2010 Yea something tells me she is using me to pick up the slack of her boyfriend, and im not the type to do the work so someone else can reep the benifits and it seems like thats what im doin. I was just hoping it was a simple booty call but then the whole games of wanting to see me one minute to not being able to go thru with it in an hour later, i dunno its like girlfriend drama without the girlfriend should i screw the booty call and tell her to piss off?
HLP234 Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 I would tell her that you don't want to talk to her anymore or see her. If she asks why you can tell her that since she left, you don't owe her anything, you don't want to be hurt, and you need someone that appreciates you. Basically telling her to screw off but not literally.
USMCHokie Posted January 13, 2010 Posted January 13, 2010 She sounds like a nut. THIS. Makes you wonder if she ever ran into someone else's arms while you were dating...yikes...
Recommended Posts