scotsabroad Posted January 11, 2010 Posted January 11, 2010 Hi everyone, this is my first post on the forum and I am utterly baffled at what I should do. I've been with my partner for 5 years and he is the kindest, most caring person I could ever want who worships the ground that I walk on and is truly in love with me. My problem is that I'm not sure I feel the same any more. Over the last few weeks and months I have slowly come to the realisation that I love him like a brother or a best friend but not as a partner. For me there is no physical attraction any more and it is really eating me up inside. I'm starting to feel resentful towards him because I feel trapped in a situation I can't get out of. Financially we're pretty dire at the moment and if I leave I screw him completely and break his heart. If I stay, I will end up resenting him even more, act crazy and horrible towards him and just be a complete a**hole to him. I don't want to do that and it is killing me thinking what it will do to him if I leave. We've just made a big move and we are literally down here knowing no-one. If I leave he will have nobody.. I don't know what I should do and I really care for him and have no idea how to get myself out of this situation. Any advice would be welcome
giotto Posted January 11, 2010 Posted January 11, 2010 (edited) We've just made a big move and we are literally down here knowing no-one. If I leave he will have nobody.. I don't know what I should do and I really care for him and have no idea how to get myself out of this situation. Any advice would be welcome why did you make the big move if you felt this way towards him? Did you think that the move might fix the relationship? Do you have any children? edit: did you move abroad from Scotland? Edited January 11, 2010 by giotto
bestplayer Posted January 11, 2010 Posted January 11, 2010 Hi everyone, this is my first post on the forum and I am utterly baffled at what I should do. I've been with my partner for 5 years and he is the kindest, most caring person I could ever want who worships the ground that I walk on and is truly in love with me. My problem is that I'm not sure I feel the same any more. Over the last few weeks and months I have slowly come to the realisation that I love him like a brother or a best friend but not as a partner. For me there is no physical attraction any more and it is really eating me up inside. I'm starting to feel resentful towards him because I feel trapped in a situation I can't get out of. Financially we're pretty dire at the moment and if I leave I screw him completely and break his heart. If I stay, I will end up resenting him even more, act crazy and horrible towards him and just be a complete a**hole to him. I don't want to do that and it is killing me thinking what it will do to him if I leave. We've just made a big move and we are literally down here knowing no-one. If I leave he will have nobody.. I don't know what I should do and I really care for him and have no idea how to get myself out of this situation. Any advice would be welcome r u married ?
Author scotsabroad Posted January 12, 2010 Author Posted January 12, 2010 We moved about 6 months ago, everything was still good then and I think I had maybe just started suspecting I felt differently but hadn't really identified what the problem was yet. I'm not married yet but I think it could be on the cards soon.
giotto Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 We moved about 6 months ago, everything was still good then and I think I had maybe just started suspecting I felt differently but hadn't really identified what the problem was yet. I'm not married yet but I think it could be on the cards soon. I suppose you don't have any children... it's not an easy position to be in... have you talked to him about it? Before you ditch everything, maybe you could try a bit of marriage counselling?
bestplayer Posted January 12, 2010 Posted January 12, 2010 We moved about 6 months ago, everything was still good then and I think I had maybe just started suspecting I felt differently but hadn't really identified what the problem was yet. I'm not married yet but I think it could be on the cards soon. if u dont love him , do u desire to be in love him ? if u do want to be in love with him , it can work out . If u really have no desire to be with him u need to be honest & leave him. he might be devastated , but this is life not everybody gets the love of his life. besides that , this is not very uncommon situation & most of the times it passes of its own best of luck
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