BreakingUpIsCrap Posted January 10, 2010 Posted January 10, 2010 Today I'll get to see dumper since NC 2 weeks ago. In that time she has sent apologies (more like crumbs). Should I ignore her? Also why would she be sending me an apology so soon? I know she hasnt had time to reflect on the nasty things she said and did. Havent broken NC but feel rotten for ignoring an apology even though its so obvious that she's only trying to make herself feel better and kill the guilt. Pls help.
JaneDoe35 Posted January 10, 2010 Posted January 10, 2010 Hard to know what she is up to. Possibly just trying to get you to help her relieve some of her guilt..... I wouldn't ignore her. Just say hi and move on from her quickly. Don't get into any lengthy conversation with her. Dont say 'I forgive you', don't even bring it up. And don't give her the chance to. Good luck, JD
paleblue Posted January 10, 2010 Posted January 10, 2010 why are you feeling rotten for ignoring an apology you know is not genuine. she prob is just trying to relieve her guilt. i was going to say stick to NC and keep moving on, but than you said you are going to see her today. so that blows that out of the water. what is the reason for seeing her? if you have too i would just do what Jane Doe suggests, keep it short and polite and dont say much. than after that, move on with your life.
DiscoChick Posted January 10, 2010 Posted January 10, 2010 what is the reason for seeing her? Good question. I'm guessing he's going to interrogate her.
Author BreakingUpIsCrap Posted January 10, 2010 Author Posted January 10, 2010 Thanks all for your advice. Dumpee never showed today. We normaly attend the same church. Thats why we would've met today. NC still in force x
HLP234 Posted January 10, 2010 Posted January 10, 2010 I'm surprised its been a short while before she wanted to say anything. I would be weary anyways, even if it had been months. If they never said anything when you guys broke up, whats the point of listening to her about how sorry she is now. Its not like it will make things better for you, most of the time it does not mean you are gonna be getting back together. Just stick to NC and heal yourself.
TaraMaiden Posted January 10, 2010 Posted January 10, 2010 The only thing you should pay any attention to, if you see fit, is this: "I am so sorry. I realise I made the most dreadful mistake, and I realise I love you more than ever, and would love to try again. Tell me what I need to do, and I'll do whatever it takes to make you trust me again, for as long as it takes. Would you be willing to try again?" Anything else is just trying to reel in a response, and should be roundly ignored. With bells on. I very much doubt this will ever come from her though... Good thing she didn't show today. I suspect she was too embarassed because she knows what a jerkess she's been. (it's a word!)
HLP234 Posted January 10, 2010 Posted January 10, 2010 I wonder if anyone has ever gotten that response. I know I probably won't, shes the one that left me hanging and removed me from all forms of contact. Oh and you are right, she probably never said anything because she knows what she did to me was stupid and not right at all. Probably ashamed a little to even say anything, most likely, or maybe not but that is what I am assuming.
Author BreakingUpIsCrap Posted January 11, 2010 Author Posted January 11, 2010 I don't think this sort of message will ever come. Not with fancy man whispering sweet nothings into her ear from afar... gosh the things I'd promise a woman that was 5k miles away.... she'd be putty in my fingers when we finally met!!! I have now found out that my lady is bi Polar.... I am still digesting that and the whoppers that she gave me along the way...I am scared for her.... The only thing you should pay any attention to, if you see fit, is this: "I am so sorry. I realise I made the most dreadful mistake, and I realise I love you more than ever, and would love to try again. Tell me what I need to do, and I'll do whatever it takes to make you trust me again, for as long as it takes. Would you be willing to try again?" Anything else is just trying to reel in a response, and should be roundly ignored. With bells on. I very much doubt this will ever come from her though... Good thing she didn't show today. I suspect she was too embarassed because she knows what a jerkess she's been. (it's a word!)
Silver_star Posted January 11, 2010 Posted January 11, 2010 I think you answered you own question. Reread your thread and you will read what you have decided already. 1. shes throwing you "crumbs" 2. She is just trying to ease her guilt. So i would not feel bad about ignoring it. You need to do what is right for you, she will need to respect that as a consequence of her decision not to be with you.
Recommended Posts