jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 So, I realize this is kind of a disgusting topic, but this just dawned on me. Probably something to do with the hemorrhoids thread, that made me think of it. So, there was this guy I met on Myspace a while back. I went out with him once to the movies, and there wasn't much chemistry on my part. Of course, I didn't want to just nip it in the bud, because I believe you shouldn't always expect that major spark immediately. Well, we spent some time talking online as well. His job required he work a lot of overtime, so we honestly didn't have much time to hang out or talk. He informed me of this problem he had. He told me he has some intestinal issue, that apparently is genetic. To me it sounded more like a bad case of irritable bowel syndrome, but I don't know..... First off, he mentioned dairy bothering him, so I thought "oh, probably lactose intolerance". Nope, he started having to get up to make a run to the toilet, during most of our chats. First it was something as simple as milk or eggs, then it was bacon. It seems like everything he ate he had to go to the bathroom. He then informed me he usually has to go up to 10 times or so a day to the toilet. To top it off he is kind of on skinny side, and I think its because he's loosing nutrition. He actually seemed scared to eat in general because he might have to the restroom. He told me he has been to the doctor, but they do not know for sure what he has. I do not understand how a doctor can't figure this out. Well, honestly it does seem rather disgusting. What would you do if you met a guy, and found this out right away? Would it turn you off, or would it be a deal breaker for you? Luckily, I decided to not date this guy for other reasoning, but let me tell you, if I had dated him , I have a feeling this would have been a huge hassle. I mean, how do you enjoy life, if you live on the toilet, 24/7? I mean how do you deal with that. Thoughts......
threebyfate Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 I'm no doctor but he sounds like he has Crone's disease.
Author jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Author Posted January 9, 2010 I'm no doctor but he sounds like he has Crone's disease. Hmm, that's definitely a possibility, but surely doctor could find that out. Since the doctor supposedly doesn't know , I suggested he try probiotics, and some other natural alternatives. He acted like he wasn't interested. It's almost as if he didn't care to get better.
threebyfate Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 If you're in the U.S. and he doesn't have medical insurance or has a pre-existing condition, he might not be able to afford any kind of intensive testing.
alphamale Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 its generally not a good idea to talk about certain subjects early in the dating process, medical issues is one of them
DiscoChick Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 I think I would be willing to give him a try if he was interesting enough, but in the long run, I'd probably not go beyond friendship with him. I agree with you, he does sound like he has IBS. IBS can cause frequent diarrhea. My cousin through marriage has it, and her symptoms are very similar, except she isn't thin and afraid to eat.
OnlyJake Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 its generally not a good idea to talk about certain subjects early in the dating process, medical issues is one of them This.......
Author jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Author Posted January 9, 2010 its generally not a good idea to talk about certain subjects early in the dating process, medical issues is one of them True, but maybe he didn't think anything of it. Also, difficult to hide getting up every little bit from PC and not coming back for the usual amount of time it takes to use the restroom. I am pretty sure he has medical insurance. He has a really good job too. Sounded like he has had lots of testing, but maybe not. A mysterious intestinal issue.
Author jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Author Posted January 9, 2010 I think I would be willing to give him a try if he was interesting enough, but in the long run, I'd probably not go beyond friendship with him. I see, but if its something he absolutely can't help, wouldn't it be wrong to brush him off because of it? I know this, but at same time, it does turn me off. It sounds kind of gross, and I hope he is very hygienic at least. I once in a while see him on chat, and he talks about how he hasn't met anyone. I hope it's not something to do with his problem...
OnlyJake Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 True, but maybe he didn't think anything of it. It's bad manners to mention those things to strangers. His lack of manners/discretion would turn me off more than his medical problem itself.
alphamale Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 True, but maybe he didn't think anything of it. Also, difficult to hide getting up every little bit from PC and not coming back for the usual amount of time it takes to use the restroom. I am pretty sure he has medical insurance. He has a really good job too. Sounded like he has had lots of testing, but maybe not. A mysterious intestinal issue. a few people have very serious digestive system problems that are hard to manage with therapy and drugs. maybe he's one of them. believe me i know my dads a retired gastroenterologist. if he has a profound case of IBS then that would be hard to treat and you can't just take his colon out
Author jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Author Posted January 9, 2010 It's bad manners to mention those things to strangers. His lack of manners/discretion would turn me off more than his medical problem itself. Actually, even though we went out once. We had conversed back and forth on myspace for a good bit before meeting. When he told me about his issue, I felt like he wasn't a total stranger.
alphamale Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Actually, even though we went out once. We had conversed back and forth on myspace for a good bit before meeting. When he told me about his issue, I felt like he wasn't a total stranger. so whens the second date??
OnlyJake Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Actually, even though we went out once. We had conversed back and forth on myspace for a good bit before meeting. When he told me about his issue, I felt like he wasn't a total stranger. Ooooh, so it was more like it was getting to the point where he felt it was time to disclose that info to you? In that case, my attitude toward his "problem" would depend on HIS attitude toward it.
DiscoChick Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 I see, but if its something he absolutely can't help, wouldn't it be wrong to brush him off because of it? I know this, but at same time, it does turn me off. It would be wrong to brush him off because of it, but I KNOW the relationship would be strained. I'd rather not even get into it.
Author jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Author Posted January 9, 2010 It would be wrong to brush him off because of it, but I KNOW the relationship would be strained. I'd rather not even get into it. Yes, relationship is not the only thing being strained. (yes that's what I mean) There is no second date. We do chat once in a while on IM, and I think he is still interested in seeing me.
Author jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Author Posted January 9, 2010 Ooooh, so it was more like it was getting to the point where he felt it was time to disclose that info to you? In that case, my attitude toward his "problem" would depend on HIS attitude toward it. I'm not sure. I guess its a big part of his life, and was difficult for him to hide. I remember first time he brought it up. We were chatting, and he was like "brb". That's all I needed to know, but he came back and was talking about how the bacon bothered him. Next time, same sort of deal. At first, I thought he was saying he just had lactose intolerance, but then informed me it was worse than that.
DiscoChick Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Yes, relationship is not the only thing being strained. (yes that's what I mean) There is no second date. We do chat once in a while on IM, and I think he is still interested in seeing me. I applaud you for trying. I dated a guy with mild OCD and ADD for a whole eight months.
Author jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Author Posted January 9, 2010 I applaud you for trying. I dated a guy with mild OCD and ADD for a whole eight months. Well, it's not that I don't understand problems. I have ones of my own. Actually, I have a sensitive stomach, but its nothing in comparison to that. It concerned me that he seemed to be losing weight too. I guess it is a turn off because he appears really unhealthy and sits on the toilet half the day. I mean in general going to the restroom is not appealing, but when someone tells you that go all day....
meerkat stew Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Most women I've dated have some form of peanut bladder, so could probably look past it personally.
Author jw90063 Posted January 9, 2010 Author Posted January 9, 2010 Most women I've dated have some form of peanut bladder, so could probably look past it personally. Is that urinary frequency?
meerkat stew Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Is that urinary frequency? Yeah, sorry for the slang, they tend to have to go at least once an hour. I generally keep my women drunk, so that may have something to do with it.
tami-chan Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Most women I've dated have some form of peanut bladder, so could probably look past it personally. Really...interesting...! none of them knew how to do Kegel exercises? you could have benefited from it!
meerkat stew Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Really...interesting...! none of them knew how to do Kegel exercises? you could have benefited from it! C'mon Tami, you know me well enough by now to know I was just setting up the "drunk" joke but I like the way you think re: kegels. I do em, everyone should! But was serious in that I'd wait for other signs, gained from in-person contact, before nixing this guy.
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