Gabriele Posted January 8, 2010 Posted January 8, 2010 So silly, I find myself daily checking in here. I keep looking for that post that will help me find some...... I don't know comfort, answers..... I am glad I found this site, it helps knowing that I (we all) are not alone in this, even though each situation is so different. And I have found some great insight. Funny enough......it hasn't all gone away. darn. Misery loves company i guess . anyone got the right post?
HeyThere Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Is this question related to your thread of “Husband cheated years ago, but just told me....anyone else with similar story?” I would assume you are feeling a lot of pain – my heart goes out to you. I haven’t read the thread other than the original post and your comment of searching for resolve brought that to mind.
Spark1111 Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 Gabriele, I, too go through periods of great resolve, optimism, and living a better and happier life. When I feel stronger, more in control, I seem to have less need for LS. It is the times I backslide, feel a trigger, experience weakness, that I turn to LS to get some questions answered. Sometimes, I do not even truly know what the the question IS, so it becomes hard to know what I am searching for on these boards. But I do continue to search, and at times, I am even lucky enough to find a post that causes me to have an "AHA" moment in my own recovery. And that is a good thing. I hope you have the same from time to time.
wheelwright Posted January 9, 2010 Posted January 9, 2010 I did get some great realisations from LS. It takes people being in a similar situation or in the situation of the person you are concerned about to get those AHA moments I think. Perhaps your case is not so common here. I have experienced what you did, but in my R I had also been unfaithful. Perhaps search in yourself to find what you are really asking to resolve, and start a thread on that? Is it jealousy? Or that you don't fully understand what happened? Is betrayal for you a life long trigger? Is there a reason you want to question the M beyond this old betrayal? Do you know why your H brought it up after all this time? Is he triggering trust issues in any other way? Are you bored and this is the most emotionally challenging thing that has happened in a while? Why the strong focus? Search yourself, ask here, and you may find some of the answers you seek. I understand that searching you are doing. For me, it meant finding the focus of the things I needed to work through.
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