Why do u need to rid yourself of the love in ur life to sort out your life's confusio

[MysticalZ]

Well after a long drawn out 9 months of being with someone who wasn't certain if he was ready emotionally and mentally to commit, he told me today that he needs to be 'alone' to sort himself out, figure out what his direction in life will be. We both feel/felt the soul mate thing, not that that really matters *sigh*. He's had a rough last 2 years, realised that he is internally miserable and I understand why he needs to be alone to work on his life. I would also say that he is clinically depressed, worn down at this time and unable to view his life with clarity.

 

But how hard is it for us who are left stranded by love? Sooo painful. The only faith we can hold on to is that everything will work out as it should. I am hoping that after he's had a few months to seek clarity that he will realise that he misses and needs me.. If he doesn't, well, c'est la vie... That is life...

 

I know the next few weeks/months r going to b painful for the both of us. I need to be strong, move forward as though he may not return. All I have is faith. All I ask for is happiness. All I send him is love. All I want to do is rid myself of this horrible feeling. I wish I was happy.

 

Why do u need to rid yourself of the love in ur life to sort out your life's confusion?

[yogi-mon]

Variety of reasons.

Most of which usually have nothing to do with the question being asked.

IE I would largely place doubt on the question itself.

 

Most likely he wants to "spread his wings" so to speak.

 

He may just feel caught in a loop, and is looking for a scape goat.

You sound, strong, and in control of your emotions.

 

You will be fine. Keep that chin up.

[MysticalZ]

Scapegoat? Not sure of what you mean exactly. As in to leave the relationship or me? He has said he needs to sort out his life, then he can commit to whatever decision he makes with clarity. He said that he is still inlove with me, that he still sees the children and marriage but his life direction is leading to a breakdown and he doesn't feel it's right to bring someone down along with him. He needs to come to his decision without having someone beside him. He feels that should he be ready in future, it's likely I'll be the one he calls. Cross fingers that once the clouds disappear from his view on life, that his love will call..

[UCFKevin]

I just went through this, more or less. Didn't end well. Don't get your hopes up, I hate to say.

 

Sometimes a person's own selfishness can overshadow the love they feel for someone else. Regardless of the past, regardless of what you say or do now, they will do what they want with absolutely no regard to your feelings at all.

[MysticalZ]

Thanks, I agree.

[monkey]

Hey i totally understand, i feel like i have had my leg chopped off, my life is in a void & in limbo, i try to be positive, i hope my girl changes my mind, i think i'm crazy when i plan things for us in my mind, when all she wants is lots of space!! If it's "how it should be" doesn't seem good enough, but i understand!, & it hurts sooo much, but these things do happen ( positive ones), thats all we have, i just hope i haven't been watching too many movies. there is a lot of time in the future & anything can happen, this is how we have to feel, or we'll go crazy..

Take Care.

[lostinthought]

I understand the feeling. I am in limbo. How do one let go when you feel in your heart that it's meant to be? Giving them their space is showing them you love them is so whack! I hate this feeling. I too wish that he gets over his pain. I too wish that love will return. I too wish this terrible missing and longing feeling to go away. I too wish to be happy.

[MysticalZ]

Hi Guys, how r u? Hope ur well,

 

Get this! Since our official break up last Friday where he told he how confused and lost he was, needs to get his head and self straight b4 he can think about love etc, I have had an amazing sense of peace and calm. I truly feel that our love is one that reaches far beyond this lifetime and yet I have no fear of the outcome. It's amazing.

 

I have come to terms with this - If our love is true, if it is truuuly meant to be, then he will see the light. I have utmost faith in that. But, even if he does not and chooses to follow another path, I am still able to send him love and happiness on his venture. I do not have that pain and torture of wanting him to return to me now because I know 'now is not the time'. Everything is to happen in due course with divine timing. I am giving him the space and time he needs because I agree with him needing it to be sure of his direction.

 

I know I may have moments of tears and upset but I thank God that I feel this way right. I hope and send you light and love.

 

MysticalZ