Is it wrong to show effection to my husbands best friend?

[Sweetie1977]

My husbands best friend is like a part of our fmaily we see him every wekeend hes like our brother,sometimes ill put my arm around him or on his shoulder in a fun way if the conversations about him

 

I adore him but not in a sexual way hes just such a sweetheart. and my husband never says anything and i know im not doing anything wrong but im just wondering if i should keep a distance just so he doesnt get mad?

 

Do u think its disrespectful?

 

Does anyone else do this or have gone through this?

Edited January 7, 2010 by Sweetie1977

[TaraMaiden]

Well, the fact that you're asking is an indication that you know your intentions might be misinterpreted by others...

I am a very tactile, forward person.

I'm always touching people as I speak to them, on the arm, on the back....

It's a way of connecting with people, because touch is the first connection, or way of communication we ever know.

The first thing that happens to us, when we're born, is that people are helping us on our way...

as a child, we're held, cuddled and kept close....

as we get older, this invisible barrier, of 'personal space' is created, and we actually put distance between ourselves and others, to the extent that an 'invasion' of our personal space, becomes unwelcome, at times...

 

I'm Italian.

'Latin-Europeans' seem to be a lot more tactile than people from other cultures. I don't know why.

People in the UK are becoming warmer in their approach, though I know that British reserve, and the 'stiff upper lip' used to be the norm....

 

The long and the short of it is, continue being your natural self, but if your husband's best friend ever shows or gives an indication that he is reading signals you have not put there, then you may have to deal with that as it happens.

but if this is something you have been doing for a long time, and you have always behaved this way towards him, with no suggestion that he's taking it differently - then don't worry.

 

What other people suspect, is their problem, not yours.

suspicion of this kind is simply an indication of a level of reserve in their own mentality....

[AmIParanoid]

Yes of course it's wrong. You're well on the way down the slippery slope.

 

You have no need to be physically touching this friend or seeking validation for it on the internet.