Ozma Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 She is always saying snotty things to me when noones around and staring at my boyfriend and calling him shes just freaking obssesed wih him. She puts songs on her myspace about him that when I first started dating him she was sending him the lyrics. I know because he let me check out his myspace and I saw a bunch of emails (unopened) from her. I tried to be her friend because he feels bad for her because shes so messed up. He helped her get off meth and he feels responsible to her. He always said that he felt like she was his kid more than she was his girlfriend. Shes a spoiled brat and cant do anything for herself shes 21 and never has even kept a job more than a week, that is with the whole 2 jobs shes had. Im telling you guys this because I know theres no way hed go back to her but I just cant take her anymore. I cant and I dont want him being her friend. I know thats horrible and I dont want to ask him to give up his friends but he says he doesnt even want to ever hang out with her anyway. I know this is completely immature but I moved from the east coast to the west coast to be with him because he couldnt leave his dad yet. I left everyone I know behind for him. ALL my friends and family. I know its unfair of me to ask him to not be friends with her anymore. However I think that I could ask him this because like I said I left everyone behind he could at least stop being friends with her. I finally freaked out on her the other day and cussed her out when he was on the phone with her because she said at the new years eve party I was getting pissed because she was trying to help him. I wasnt! so I had enough and I started cussing her out. Now the way I feel is that if someone was talking crap about him and treating him like dirt I wouldnt be friends with them and I would stick up for him. It hurts my feelings that he is still friends with her when she treats me so bad. I dont know what else to say. I just need some advice. I dont have any friends here yet and I really need someone to talk to. My friends and family worry too much when I tell them stuff like this. Please help me! -Nicole
lucy9216 Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 He must know that this bothers you especially becuase you told her off on the phone right in front of him... what does he think of the whole situation? and is she the only one making contact with him or does he contact her too?
Buckeye Candy Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 Keep him busy with fun things (dates, sex, whatever) and he will no longer have time for her. If she demands his attention and he chooses to give it to her rather than you, you need to give him an ultimatum or decide yourself if any of the drama is worth it.
Author Ozma Posted January 5, 2010 Author Posted January 5, 2010 Well I hadnt worked up why I was so mad about it at first I was just so angry I couldnt talk or think. Or anything so we didnt really talk about it. He did say that he thought I was being childish about it though. Hes really open about his feelings and I find it harder to talk and put together my feelings. If that makes any sense. However she is the one who contacts him. She is always finding some reason to call or she'll just show up at his work. He will call her back eventually if shes called alot though because he feels bad.
Buckeye Candy Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 Well I hadnt worked up why I was so mad about it at first I was just so angry I couldnt talk or think. Or anything so we didnt really talk about it. He did say that he thought I was being childish about it though. Hes really open about his feelings and I find it harder to talk and put together my feelings. If that makes any sense. However she is the one who contacts him. She is always finding some reason to call or she'll just show up at his work. He will call her back eventually if shes called alot though because he feels bad. You're not the only one in the world who has been (rightfully) upset by the actions of crazy exes, so don't feel too bad. Don't act childish though by getting into shouting matches with her, have some self control. If he isn't enabling her behavior it may eventually go away. You'll have to figure out what you can live with in the meantime.
silic0ntoad Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 You're not the only one in the world who has been (rightfully) upset by the actions of crazy exes, so don't feel too bad. Don't act childish though by getting into shouting matches with her, have some self control. If he isn't enabling her behavior it may eventually go away. You'll have to figure out what you can live with in the meantime. Yeah. I feel this. I am seeing a girl I met on the holidays and her ex is a f*cking psycho. He wants to talk to me on the phone now. I am not a little guy, nor am I a pussy, but honestly, I deem it below me to get into an altercation with an estranged love interest. He actually showed up at her condo the other night trying to fight me, so I was stuck there until he left. Now he won't stop calling her. She finally blocked his number today and I guess she is looking into a restraining order. So I know what you mean
Author Ozma Posted January 5, 2010 Author Posted January 5, 2010 Thank you even hearing other peoples stories is making me feel better.
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