Gypsie Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 (edited) I ended up ending it with my ex. It wasn't serious (FWB) and had been going on for like two years. I kind of wanted to get out of it because I did want something more, with someone. I have tried to get out of it before, but he kept sucking me back in though. I changed my number the last time I ended it, cause I didn't want it to happen again. Somehow we ended up contacting each other online. (I never gave him my new number though). The last week or so. We kept fighting with each other also and it wasn't working out. It wasn't fun anymore for me either. That's when I ended it for good. I ended up getting this really nasty email from him on the weekend. Saying really hurtful things, that he was seeing other girls (which he knew I hated), belittling me, calling me a hooker, saying that he despised me, amongst other really horrible things. WTF? Blocked him after it but. If he wanted to hurt me by it. It worked. It upset me a lot. Why write something like that to me when he was the one that didn't want anything serious to begin with. . Edited January 5, 2010 by Gypsie
xerofate Posted January 6, 2010 Posted January 6, 2010 if he said he was seeing other girls, to make you jealous, and it made you jealous, yet you were just fwb..... Seems to me like you felt you were in a serious relationship, and were hurt by what he said. Although I have to ask: why do you think he sent you this horrible hateful email if what you did didn't hurt? If it didn't hurt, he wouldn't have bothered sending the email. If I were you, I would re-evaluate where exactly your relationship with him was headed. Perhaps he wanted what you wanted, just doesn't realize it till now?
Catseye8 Posted January 6, 2010 Posted January 6, 2010 Oh Gypsie, I'm sorry. Regardless of what he did or didn't want from the relationship, that was a mean and cruel thing to send you and totally out of line. Why write something like that to me when he was the one that didn't want anything serious to begin with. Sounds like he's hurt/angry at you leaving, and he's lashing out. Just because he didn't want exactly the same kind of relationship you did doesn't mean he wanted a totally commitment-free FWB relationship either; you said he sucked you back in once before, he's clearly not letting you go with a shrug and an 'oh well'. I had an FWB relationship with one guy for almost a year, on/off. It ended for good once he declared that he loved me one night, and then the next day texted me to say he was selling his house and moving 200 miles away so probably wouldn't see me again, be well. Um, right, then... He came back a few months later, but by then I was seeing someone else and not interested. Long-term FWB relationships can be really, really difficult to do. Very often emotions get involved, and not in a healthy way. It sounds like you did the right thing by deciding what kind of relationship you wanted and going to get it; don't let this guy make his problems yours to deal with.
sean1970 Posted January 6, 2010 Posted January 6, 2010 I ended up getting this really nasty email from him on the weekend. Saying really hurtful things, that he was seeing other girls (which he knew I hated), belittling me, calling me a hooker, saying that he despised me, amongst other really horrible things... I'm old enough to have seen the movie The Breakfast Club probably 100 times; there is a high probability that you have never heard of it.. That said, Bender would have replied, "You forgot ugly, lazy, and disrespectful." Gypsie, it is an effort to break you down emotionally; an attempt to gain control. It's bull****. Thank whatever God you believe in that he is no longer your problem.
sean1970 Posted January 6, 2010 Posted January 6, 2010 If I were you, I would re-evaluate where exactly your relationship with him was headed. Perhaps he wanted what you wanted, just doesn't realize it till now? Surely you jest...
Author Gypsie Posted January 7, 2010 Author Posted January 7, 2010 (edited) I will admit a part of me did hope that something more would eventuate. Now I am realising that, that will never happen. It was all about him and about what he wanted. It was doing my head in the last couple of weeks. It was probably the hidden reason of why we were fighting too. I guess because he isn't getting what he wants anymore he is lashing out perhaps? Plus to break me down as well. Agree with that one. He didn't get to me too much though. Already was over it. Now he is saying he was the one that rejected me? Going on about how he blocked me from Facebook early on. LOL. Even after that I still got phone calls and texts from him. Just recently I ended up changing my number. Didn't want to get sucked back into it. Took drastic measures that time. He even showed up at my doorstep at one stage when he couldn't get through on the phone. He worked out that I had changed my number. Had the nerve to ask for my new one. Didn't tell him it and ended up telling him to go, he did. Luckily. After that. That's when the email thing happened. It all just ended up in one big mess. He's problem thank god. Exactly. Not mine. Edited January 7, 2010 by Gypsie
deux ex machina Posted January 7, 2010 Posted January 7, 2010 (edited) Oh, please! Haha. Classic. He's doing the Degrade, Devalue, Discard thing. Whatever you do, don't take it personally. Know that everything he is saying is actually him talking about himself, so know that and stay away from it. This is his mess. Not yours. Keep your head up, sweetheart. You did nothing wrong to deserve this, besides being a walking reminder of how much he sucks. Edited January 7, 2010 by deux ex machina
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