New Again Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 is this a double standard women impose on men? What if a woman was still living with her parents, would this be a red flag? A 31 year old woman, who is physically and financially capable of caring for herself and living on her own living at home BECAUSE SHE WANTS HER PARENTS TO TAKE CARE OF HER = RED FLAG. There is no double standard in this scenario.
Chocolat Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 Just to play devil's advocate... Isn't it possible that when he first moved back home he thought it would be temporary, then he met you and realised he'd be better off staying put and increasing his savings so the two of you could get married and buy a house at some point in the not-too-distant future? Or maybe when he moved in he thought it would be unpleasant but he's since discovered that since his folks are away a lot, it's no big deal. He gets to save money and he's helping his parents financially. I agree that it's important to know that someone is capable of living independently, but it's also important to have the wisdom to know when to save and when to spend. Seems to me that a 30yo man who has the opportunity to do some significant saving is smart to take it. Presumably, he'll be married in a few years and once he starts a family the days of saving are largely over. Oh, and I would not read so much into his comment that he enjoys mom's food nor that he doesn't have a 5-year plan. The former comment could have been made light-heartedly and he may not have understood your sub-text with the latter. Or he may have thought you were asking whether he planned to marry you. There are many reasons his response may have been non-committal that don't necessarily point to him being a momma's boy.
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