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Worth a Second Chance?

willNYC

By willNYC
in Second Chances

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willNYC New Member

willNYC

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After my ex left me I was hoping one day she would return and ask for me back. Well the day has come and now I am unsure if I can give it a second chance. We had 3 year relationship a good one but after I screwed up with flirting but told her it all she left a little while later for my good friend. Now she wants back because I am the one so she says. I am very unsure can this be a worthy second chance? can write more detail if needed

LoveSparks New Member

LoveSparks

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hey, i'll be straight up with you. i think it's shady that she dated one of your good friends after y'all broke up. kinda shady of your friend too. no offense, just being honest.

 

did you want her back because it was something you were used to or because the relationship was fulfilling for you?

 

personally, if my ex dated a good friend of mine, i wouldn't take him back cuz all i'd be able to think about was THEM being intimate. i'd feel betrayed.

 

that'd be my main reason for not getting back together. if it's something that bothers you, trust your instincts. if not, make sure there are no other reasons. i mean, you DID say that y'all broke up cuz of your flirting habbits, so you need to make sure that THAT won't resurface and continue this time around.

 

your best bet is to be honest with yourself and honest with each other when you talk about the relationship and where you both want it to go.

 

sometimes when people get back together, they either realize why they broke up in the first place or that they really can't live without each other and decide to leave the past behind.

 

hope this helps :)

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willNYC New Member

willNYC

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Posted

Thank you for your answers

 

hey, i'll be straight up with you. i think it's shady that she dated one of your good friends after y'all broke up. kinda shady of your friend too. no offense, just being honest.

 

personally, if my ex dated a good friend of mine, i wouldn't take him back cuz all i'd be able to think about was THEM being intimate. i'd feel betrayed.

 

I agree that it is shady. But I think that during the time they were together she came to find that I was better and she made a mistake she said. Not that it makes it better or anything.

 

did you want her back because it was something you were used to or because the relationship was fulfilling for you?

 

I can be honest and say she did bring out the best in me and I matured with her and was very happy

 

f not, make sure there are no other reasons. i mean, you DID say that y'all broke up cuz of your flirting habbits, so you need to make sure that THAT won't resurface and continue this time around.

 

I agree too. I worked on myself a lot and will continue to forver with other women even if this second chance doesnt happen.

 

your best bet is to be honest with yourself and honest with each other when you talk about the relationship and where you both want it to go.

 

sometimes when people get back together, they either realize why they broke up in the first place or that they really can't live without each other and decide to leave the past behind.

 

hope this helps :)

 

The problem I think is the shadiness you said. I think any small problems can be easy fix with some work.

LoveSparks New Member

LoveSparks

Posted
Posted

The problem I think is the shadiness you said. I think any small problems can be easy fix with some work.

 

ok, so she may have realized that you're the better man for her but if her shadiness really bothers you, you gotta tell her and make it very serious.. kinda like, "you can't have me back if you're gonna be shady. how can i trust you in the future?"

 

woman always want what they can't have (i guess men too). anyways, if she REALLY wants to be with you, she'll make the necessary changes and prove to you that you can trust her again.

 

did she give you any reasons to not trust her during your relationship? or was it just afterward?

 

best thing to do is have a serious conversation like adults and ask her why you should take her back. yeah, it's blunt and kinda sounds like the dreaded interview question "why should we hire you", but it'll put her on the spot so you can study her reaction.

 

i'm not saying do this to be cruel or harsh.. i've been put on the spot before by a guy i REALLY liked with a similar question and even though i was stuttering and couldn't spit the words out, my genuineness showed through. THAT'S what you gotta look for and appreciate.

 

if you like her answer and your intuition says it could possibly work out, give it a try and TAKE IT SLOW. be cautious and give it time to develop again. sometimes when we get back with our exes, we remember why we broke up in the first place. other times, we see the changes and it's like being with someone new. 50% chance i guess.

 

how long have y'all been broken up and how long has she dated your friend? just curious to know how long it took her to realize what she had.

 

best of luck 'n talk soon :)

Oh Moe Established Member

Oh Moe

Posted
Posted

Well I wanted my ex back more then anything in the world three months ago. I would have died for a second chance. Well she was abusive to me. rude and disrespectful. She dumped not only on me but my kids.

She called I ignored her, text I ignored her. Then I thought of her kids and maybe she did something or they were sick. She wanted to meet and I said OK. She tells me she's not happy but her CrackHead B/F still is home in our bed. She misses me and loves me. She said this all along but wanted her unemployed CH BF.

I had little respect for her at this point but figured we would talk. Well I'm embarrassed to tell what I did to her but I didn't think she would ever contact me again, guess what she tried to talk to me a few days ago. I have no feelings for her at all none actually don't even like her.

Like you dude she's not the same person if she slept with your friend, like mine slept around.

Be careful and very slow if you do it. You will always be looking over your shoulder for another friend with his zipper down.

LoveSparks New Member

LoveSparks

Posted
Posted (edited)

Hey Will (I'm guessing)..

 

I ran across a solution that might help you out. I read an e-book I'm selling about how to rekindle love and reunite with your ex. I came across a few pages (pg. 18-19 if you do end up getting it) that talk about infidelity and whether you should or should not get back with your ex.

 

Anyways, it made me think of your situation. The whole book was actually quite eye opening to me. The author decoded relationships in a very simple way, it was nuts. I thought I knew a lot about relationships but after reading about the "core" factors, I'd have to say, I didn't even consider the points he brought up. Oh yeah, 'n it's written by a guy so it's not all mushy or anything.

 

If you want to check it out, go to www.getyourexbackstrategy.com/magic. Like I said, I am selling it but I really *REALLY* recommend you check it out because I really think it'll help you out. If you buy it from me then GREAT! You can figure out whether you want to get your girl back AND help me pay my bills (win-win!). If not, no hard feelings, promise. :)

 

Best of luck!

Edited by LoveSparks
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