Does it change when women get to their 30's?

January 4, 2010

I found the cultures to be far different from that here in the US and the behaviors and emotional styles of the ladies in my age group (30's-40's during that period) to be more compatible. I also found men to be more compatible (as friends). I think, if the OP has visited, especially if he's immersed, meaning stayed/worked there for awhile, and finds the environment to be more compatible, well, it's a small world There are a lot of ex-pats out there who agree with that.

From the PM's I get, it doesn't sound strictly male either. Women are expanding their geographical horizons to find compatible mates too. Good on them

From the times I have lived in Europe, their sexual standards were immensely "looser" than here in the States. I'm not sure this makes a difference to you, but it sure seems to make a difference to Cognac. Asia was hit or miss....The women were either over the top conservative or wild and insane.

January 4, 2010

Well yes. Would you think that Mick Jagger is the same as the 50 yr old busker at the buss stop? Mick Jagger is a musician and leads a rock and roll lifestyle, old or not, he walks the talk. Some 50 yr old busker begging for money hasn't quite come to terms with the fact that his career is NOT going to be in rock and roll, and yet he should. [/Quote]
Making music and being a skateboarder are two different things. Music (even though I hate the rolling stones) is something that transcends age and culture. And no, the busker is not any lamer than Mick Jagger, the busker chances are loves music MORE than jagger. He is admirable actually, because he makes music for the sake of it, while mick jagger does something he might not even want to do anymore, to pay the bills.

Again, women seem to think that whether something is positive or negative depends on how much money you make with it. Being a loser is not about dollars and cents in my opinion, being a loser is about your character and brain.

At 21 or 25 it's a lot to ask of a young guy to give up his dreams. Let's get some perspective here shall we? [/Quote]If a guy at 21 dreams of getting paid to smoke grass and skateboard all day, why do you want to waste time with such a jackass anyway?

There are people who play World Of Warcraft, and make a living from it. Does that make them any better than your average fat pimply nerd who does the same? No. The only difference is one got lucky that there are people willing to pay him to play a video game, while the other is not.

Tony Hawk, walks the talk therefore he can wear whatever the hell he wants and he is still true to who he is. He is a professional skater, do you want him to wear a suit and tie and Prada Oxfords when he skates or does appearances? [/Quote]No, what I want is for him to grow the hell up and act his age. But unfortunately, according to the laws of stimulation, as long as masses of asses of drooling retards and women think what he does is cool, he will continue. When you reward idiocy, it inevitably grows.

I don't want tony hawk to wear a suit and tie, but he should get a real job and contribute something to society, like any real man would do.

January 4, 2010

Hi, original poster here. Wow this thread has really exploded since last night;). I have some catching up to do.

For all the talk of men letting their penis' lead them , women are no better. The only difference is that women have the power to make romance healthy and decent , they have the power to decide who are the men who are getting love and how fast they are getting sex and who isn't, they are the ones who choose,

Men have the power to make romance healthy and decent as well if the are strong willed enough.

January 4, 2010

Making music and being a skateboarder are two different things.

no it's not, it's the same thing. It's following a passion. You may think it's stupid and you are entitled to your personal views but it's the same thing.

If a guy at 21 dreams of getting paid to smoke grass and skateboard all day, why do you want to waste time with such a jackass anyway?

Because they were outgoing, hot, funny, cool, dressed cool, they were exciting, they had great musical taste, they had wicked bodies, they were the life of the party, they were just fun guys to be around. What is NOT to like about that at 21?

There are people who play World Of Warcraft, and make a living from it. Does that make them any better than your average fat pimply nerd who does the same?

I am sure a lot of kids can make a living out of their computer talents. Not quite the same thing at 21, at 40 the computer nerd is well cool, and not because he made more money but because being good at what he does and life experience gave him the confidence that he should have had at 21 to make him more appealing like the other "bad boys" who just had it going on.

No, what I want is for him to grow the hell up and act his age. But unfortunately, according to the laws of stimulation, as long as masses of asses of drooling retards and women think what he does is cool, he will continue. When you reward idiocy, it inevitably grows.

Yes dad!

I don't want tony hawk to wear a suit and tie, but he should get a real job and contribute something to society, like any real man would do.

He does have a real job, he is a pro skater and CEO of a very successful company.

C'mon cognac now you are sounding jealous!

January 4, 2010

I don't want tony hawk to wear a suit and tie, but he should get a real job and contribute something to society, like any real man would do.

Why should he suffer large opportunity costs to conform with your idea of what a real man does? He is one of the lucky ones who gets paid money for doing what he loves most in life. That's the real measure of success isn't it? getting paid to do something you would gladly do for free?

If only someone would pay me for flashing the women at the shopping mall... can only dream.

January 4, 2010

If only someone would pay me for flashing the women at the shopping mall... can only dream.

How good are you on stripper poles?

January 4, 2010

I should think you would do well with the 30+ crowd. I'm 1 month shy of 30 and dating an established attorney. It's VERY attractive to date a man that's established.

That's what I'm talkin' about! I think that's a good clue to know if a woman has matured...when she wants to date an established man.

So, I've read up to post 125 and somehow this thread has mophed into a topic about race and islamic religion..wtf?

January 4, 2010

no it's not, it's the same thing. It's following a passion. You may think it's stupid and you are entitled to your personal views but it's the same thing.
[/Quote]

A passion is to make beautiful art, to sacrifice, to respect, defend, and create, to invent something, to build a house from nothing, to make something from nothing with one's own will, to spiritually grow to a higher plane. What , but a soulless and/or unintelligent man, could find passion or fulfillment in propelling themselves on a piece of wood with wheels on it?

Sure, it's acceptable for a kid to be passionate about these things. But supposedly as you age, your brain grows up too, and you seek something more.

I used to be passionate about marbles when I was little. I hope you would respect me if tomorrow I was passionate about playing marbles, and became a "successful professional" marble player at age 40.

Because they were outgoing, hot, funny, cool, dressed cool, they were exciting, they had great musical taste, they had wicked bodies, they were the life of the party, they were just fun guys to be around. What is NOT to like about that at 21?[/Quote]

And this is my problem with women. That if you're "hot" you can be any breed of retard and still get lots of women. You can be a 25 year old man who rides a wheelie board, throws up gangsta signs in pictures, and thinks fart jokes are the pinnacle of humor, and still be successful with women if you're "hot". Back to square one, what makes you think that after you've had your fill of "hot" mouth breathers you deserve an intelligent, masculine, and decent man when you hit 30?

I am sure a lot of kids can make a living out of their computer talents. Not quite the same thing at 21, at 40 the computer nerd is well cool, and not because he made more money but because being good at what he does and life experience gave him the confidence that he should have had at 21 to make him more appealing like the other "bad boys" who just had it going on.
[/Quote]

Is life experience some kind of codeword for "high paying IT job" Because that's the only reason women think nerds are cool at 41, and not 21.

He does have a real job, he is a pro skater and CEO of a very successful company.
C'mon cognac now you are sounding jealous! [/Quote]

Can you name me a single society in any time period or culture outside of modern day america (and americanized nations), where riding a skateboard is considered a job?

January 4, 2010

There was the circus

There was a period, centuries gone by, where royalty employed licensed fools to entertain themselves and their subjects.

Skateboarding has much historical precedence

January 4, 2010

Most sane men like to live by some semblance of respect and honor and when respect that is due is not given and honor is absent, that triggers strong negative emotions, even if you are not directly involved in the situation. After all, what good are honor and respect if you only apply them to your individual circumstances?

Right on. It doesn't bother me much if I go on a date with a girl and she decides she doesn't want to see me anymore. No sweat, I'll move on. Now if she decides she doesn't want to see me and then completely ignores me and just writes me off, i.e no contact, then I lose alot of respect for her, because she didn't have the respect for me to let me know something. Yes, that brings up negative emotions, but really just negativity towards that particular girl. I'm not mad at all females because of her actions. This girl was 26. I had a girl who at 34 was much more respectful than that and I hope to keep in touch and continue a friendship with her. Girl 26 needs to wake up.

January 4, 2010

Lol, I like the description "propelling themselves on a piece of wood with wheels on it"

However...look at the hero worship of golfers, footballers, basketball players. Same diff, men running around a court, a field, walking around a course and trying to get balls into things. Skill is needed for all, that's why people respect those who can skillfully do something they cannot.

And this is my problem with women. That if you're "hot" you can be any breed of retard and still get lots of women. You can be a 25 year old man who rides a wheelie board, throws up gangsta signs in pictures, and thinks fart jokes are the pinnacle of humor, and still be successful with women if you're "hot". Back to square one, what makes you think that after you've had your fill of "hot" mouth breathers you deserve an intelligent, masculine, and decent man when you hit 30?

'women' in general. 'women' in your experience. Honestly look at the kind of women who date the kind of men you describe (no offence to the poster who went out with the pro skateboarder, I'm not lumping you in here).

If these women are such a bunch of airhead idiots whose heads are turned by fart jokes and infantile humour, then you don't want them anyway, or do you? Is this the issue, that you want the hot girls who go after the hot guys even if you hate yourself for it? That getting 'one of those girls' would be more of a badge of honour than going for someone who you consider to have shared interests and who appreciates your intelligence etc.?

I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just wondering. As I woman I can say with surity and IME that not 'all women' are like this, not even in their twenties. So maybe you are aiming for the wrong type of girl, who if you actually finally got, would find vacuous and boring.

January 4, 2010

Don't hold so much hatred. Yes there are bad men and women out there, but to remain cynical like you come off will only hinder the search for love. You should be looking for the person who is great to you NOW and will be great to you for life...regardless of any past "mistakes". You can't expect a woman to be attractive AND have their life together AND a flawless past AND be single.

Yes..NOBODY is perfect. And humans are very complex animals...the jerk one day can be a great guy the next (and vice versa). I don't think it's right to label people this-and-that...we are all ever evolving, changing, growing, and hopefully maturing.

January 5, 2010

Your best bet is to date younger women (than you), in any case. You're 31, so date women in their late 20s. Women at or above your age in the US are often hunting for $$ so they can have a family. You may want that too, eventually, but don't put the cart before the horse. Focus on your goals in life first, and weed out the low-quality ho's.

I recommend you date a few younger girls too, for good measure...but not long term. They are great in bed but usually immature by a 31 year old's standards.

Good luck.

I have recently dated some younger women in their 20's and didn't have much luck. It seems, at least the ones I went out with just didn't have it together and we're too self involved. Also, I disgree on the 'great in bed' comment...it's all about experience my friend;). Ahh...here, here to women in their 30's!

January 5, 2010

I can only speak for myself (and I am barely 30), but as a woman, I've never seen the point in dating a "bad boy" or whatever you want to call him. Doing drugs is a complete deal breaker for me, and I won't tolerate it. I guess I can see the lure of the alpha male, and sure, I'll flirt with that guy if I'm out, but when it comes to picking a man to be with, I'm going to go for the "nice guy" every time.

With that said....I'm amazed at how often "nice" is a front for "I'm going to cheat on you until you find out, and then try to convince you that you are crazy for thinking I'm cheating on you." Or like here on LS, the number of guys who say they are decent, yet come here and bash women left and right. It's like they think women can't pick up that vibe out in real life??

My spidey sense has gotten much better over the years. and I can now spot those kind much earlier in the process, so I just bail early on.

I am very much looking for a hubby to have kids with at this point, so I won't even consider dating someone I can't see in that role.

Cheers to you Crazy Magnet...hopefully one day you will change your name to Great Nice Dude Magnet.

January 5, 2010

The only bigger lesson I think most who fail need to learn is that complaining here might be a temporary boost of "feeling better", but it doesn't solve the problem. You can't expect the other gender to change. Women who were shallow won't become open-minded. Men who are jerks won't become good decent males.

Change in your life only comes from within.

^ This. And also, decent women (and men) can smell bitterness a mile away. I have a very negative female friend who can't figure out why she can't get a second date -- even though she's quite attractive and has a lot going for her. Men are continually telling her that her negativity is a turnoff. Her response? They're all losers.

January 5, 2010

I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just wondering. As I woman I can say with surity and IME that not 'all women' are like this, not even in their twenties. So maybe you are aiming for the wrong type of girl, who if you actually finally got, would find vacuous and boring.

That's true, the kind of 21 yr old girl who goes for the Johnny Knoxville type is def. not the same type of girl who goes for the Screech from Saved by The Bell type.

Day and night.

January 5, 2010

However...look at the hero worship of golfers, footballers, basketball players. Same diff, men running around a court, a field, walking around a course and trying to get balls into things. Skill is needed for all, that's why people respect those who can skillfully do something they cannot.[/Quote]

I agree completely. I think the bread and circus culture of worshipping ball players is just as dumb.

Sure, skill is needed to play basketball. But wouldn't it be better if the people who spend their whole lives refining the "skill" of dunking a basketball or riding a skateboard, instead used that time to refine a skill that is actually useful to society?

I'm not much of a christian, but the term "Those who do not work, should not eat" from the bible, rings true to me. If you want to play basketball as a form of exercise in your free time, great, but if the center of your life is basketball, it's safe to say you are probably have the personality and intelligence of a box of rocks.

And even spectator sports like basketball and football are on a whole different level from skateboarding , you must agree. They have form, regulations, rules, require teamwork, underneath all the stupidity of spectator sports, there is some semblance of nobility and masculinity. A 26 year old man who rides a skateboard on the other hand is as big of a nerd as a guy the same age who is passionate about comic books, the only difference is that girls think skateboarders are cool because they're generally "hot" and use drugs and the comic book collector is most likely more intelligent.

'women' in general. 'women' in your experience. Honestly look at the kind of women who date the kind of men you describe (no offence to the poster who went out with the pro skateboarder, I'm not lumping you in here). [/Quote]

Virtually all the young women I know are dating guys like this or want to date guys like this. The ones that don't, want to date overachievers and uptight morons. Both just want to date a "rly hot guy".

This goes across all subcultures and women from a variety of fields. Almost all women would rather date a retarded "hot guy" than a decent looking guy like me with a good personality. The ones who pass on the retards are looking for a guy with money. These are seriously the only two kinds of women in my generation I have met throughout my life.

I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just wondering. As I woman I can say with surity and IME that not 'all women' are like this, not even in their twenties. So maybe you are aiming for the wrong type of girl, who if you actually finally got, would find vacuous and boring.[/Quote]

Well I can say that the only deal breaker interms of physical looks is that I don't like women who are overweight, and I prefer to date within my race. Outside of those two factors, anything goes.

And the "hot girls" you speak of are trash and scum I want nothing to do with. If anything a very hot woman is a turn off, I go for girls who are ok/average looking and have great personalities, and THESE women always have a boyfriend, more often than your run of the mill sorority slut. (I know plenty who are single because they're never happy with any guy and just want to have random sex all the time)

If these women are such a bunch of airhead idiots whose heads are turned by fart jokes and infantile humour, then you don't want them anyway, or do you? Is this the issue, that you want the hot girls who go after the hot guys even if you hate yourself for it? That getting 'one of those girls' would be more of a badge of honour than going for someone who you consider to have shared interests and who appreciates your intelligence etc.?[/Q

January 5, 2010

If you consider the sheer hypocrisy of this, where if these guys are seeing a negative repetitive pattern in the women they're pursuing, in other words, using bad judgement for their people pickers, that they expect that young women will have perfect judgement in men.

January 5, 2010

A passion is to make beautiful art, to sacrifice, to respect, defend, and create, to invent something, to build a house from nothing, to make something from nothing with one's own will, to spiritually grow to a higher plane.

Are you the Passion Licensing Committee? You must be chair of the board. I often wondered who regulated and determined people's passions? I'm glad to make your acquaintance, how many passionate fools' rights did you revoke today?

What , but a soulless and/or unintelligent man, could find passion or fulfillment in propelling themselves on a piece of wood with wheels on it?

That's fine so you don't see the art, I am sure similar things were said about Picasso's work, "what fool would find passion in disfiguring bodies and making them look like cubic monsters and call that art?"

You've heard of that Picasso guy right?

Sure, it's acceptable for a kid to be passionate about these things. But supposedly as you age, your brain grows up too, and you seek something more.

I hate to break it to you but there is no future in "marbles" there is a possible future if you are pro snowboarder or skateboarder or surfer. At least pick a hobby that is somewhat feasible, and no, nose picking doesn't count either!

It's no different than being a basketball player or a football player, "What kind of retard aims to get paid to dance around a court with a ball?" Oh wait, the kind of man who sees what kind of money is pumped into the whole sports industry, that's what kind.

What kind of fool goes into dentistry for a living? Who the hell wants to work on people's rotting mouths for a living? Oh right the kind of fool who realized they can make some serious coin fixing people's teeth.

See it could be applied to anything really?

January 5, 2010

If these women are such a bunch of airhead idiots whose heads are turned by fart jokes and infantile humour, then you don't want them anyway, or do you?[/Quote]

This is true, but the frustrating thing is that 2 of every 3 women I meet fall under this category.

Is this the issue, that you want the hot girls who go after the hot guys even if you hate yourself for it? That getting 'one of those girls' would be more of a badge of honour than going for someone who you consider to have shared interests and who appreciates your intelligence etc.?[/Quote]

Not at all. Do you guys think this girl is so "hot" that she is unattainable? http://c2.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/67/l_7dc35f0407b8872abc99ef3e1517e9b9.jpg

She was attractive to me sure, but her personality is what made me want her. But of course, after spending time getting to know her and falling in love, I find out she has a ****ing boyfriend. Rinse and repeat 3 or 4 more times and that's the story of my life.

January 5, 2010

Sure, skill is needed to play basketball. But wouldn't it be better if the people who spend their whole lives refining the "skill" of dunking a basketball or riding a skateboard, instead used that time to refine a skill that is actually useful to society?

It is useful to society it provides entertainment. Did it ever occur to you that we would not even be having this discussion via this medium if people weren't motivated to create entertainment?

I'm not much of a christian, but the term "Those who do not work, should not eat" from the bible, rings true to me. If you want to play basketball as a form of exercise in your free time, great, but if the center of your life is basketball, it's safe to say you are probably have the personality and intelligence of a box of rocks.

If everyone did something "useful" with their lives there would be an over-saturation of professions. We can't all be IT consultants, and doctors and police men.

You sound bitter because you must not get paid to do what you love. There is something to be said about people who follow their passions and manage to make a good living from it, that is the epitome of success regardless of what it is.

And even spectator sports like basketball and football are on a whole different level from skateboarding , you must agree. They have form, regulations, rules, require teamwork, underneath all the stupidity of spectator sports, there is some semblance of nobility and masculinity. A 26 year old man who rides a skateboard on the other hand is as big of a nerd as a guy the same age who is passionate about comic books, the only difference is that girls think skateboarders are cool because they're generally "hot" and use drugs and the comic book collector is most likely more intelligent.

It's all the same, jocks living it up.

Virtually all the young women I know are dating guys like this or want to date guys like this. The ones that don't, want to date overachievers and uptight morons. Both just want to date a "rly hot guy".

That explains the rage.

January 5, 2010

Are you the Passion Licensing Committee? You must be chair of the board. I often wondered who regulated and determined people's passions? I'm glad to make your acquaintance, how many passionate fools' rights did you revoke today?[/Quote]No, but I am a member of the "normal and intelligent people's commitee", and I revoke the license of any adult who has the same passions as my 12 year old cousin.

Abstraction about what is valuable and great and what isn't is the key to downfall. Towards the end of their empire the Romans had a passion for banal and stupid things too, America is headed for a similar fate (thank god).

That's fine so you don't see the art, I am sure similar things were said about Picasso's work, "what fool would find passion in disfiguring bodies and making them look like cubic monsters and call that art?"
You've heard of that Picasso guy right?[/Quote]Well I don't want to sway completely off topic, but modern tendency of abstract art is an embarrassment to real art. Picasso's 'art' is ugly and makes little sense. Then again we live in a world where people think Michael jackson singing over a synthesized beat is the spiritual equivelant to beauty of Bach's Seasons.

The basis of a cultured human is not how many years of college they have, but the ability to discern between what is superior and what is inferior.

I hate to break it to you but there is no future in "marbles" there is a possible future if you are pro snowboarder or skateboarder or surfer. At least pick a hobby that is somewhat feasible, and no, nose picking doesn't count either![/Quote]What about Yo-Yo's ? There are professional leagues of Yo-Yo's, Yo-Yo professionals who get financial endorsements from Yo-Yo companies, is being a professional Yo-Yo player "cool" or worthy of respect? What about that kid who dropped out of school to pursue a career as a professional Guitar Hero player, he was making a living many adults only dream of doing this, do you think this is admirable?

It's no different than being a basketball player or a football player, "What kind of retard aims to get paid to dance around a court with a ball?" Oh wait, the kind of man who sees what kind of money is pumped into the whole sports industry, that's what kind.[/Quote]Again, down to money. Making a lot of money does not make a great or admirable person, in my opinion. Nor does it mean they contribute anything worthwhile to the world. I can write a whole library of books as to why not.

What kind of fool goes into dentistry for a living? Who the hell wants to work on people's rotting mouths for a living? Oh right the kind of fool who realized they can make some serious coin fixing people's teeth.[/Quote]
Dentists provide an extremely useful service to society, they deserve their money. What do skateboarders who smoke grass and play games all day contribute? Nothing. They are the same as the hobo on the street, only difference is some corporation that wants to pedal their junk is willing to endorse such people. I wouldn't be surprised if Thunder Bird bum wine corporation started endorsing hobos next.

Edited January 5, 2010 by cognac

January 5, 2010

Sure, skill is needed to play basketball. But wouldn't it be better if the people who spend their whole lives refining the "skill" of dunking a basketball or riding a skateboard, instead used that time to refine a skill that is actually useful to society?

It is useful to society. Many millions of people love to watch basketball and other sports.

Do you think they just play ball and go out and have a good time for the rest of the day? No, they work very hard to be the best of the best. If an athlete performs at a top level and millions of people want to see it, then they deverve a big salary. It's as simple as that.

January 5, 2010

No, but I am a member of the "normal and intelligent people's commitee", and I revoke the license of any adult who has the same passions as my 12 year old cousin.

Dentists provide an extremely useful service to society, they deserve their money. What do skateboarders who smoke grass and play games all day contribute? Nothing. They are the same as the hobo on the street, only difference is some corporation that wants to pedal their junk is willing to endorse such people. I wouldn't be surprised if Thunder Bird bum wine corporation started endorsing hobos next.

People can choose their own passions and if an adult has the same passions as your 12 year old cousin, that's their personal choice.

Dentists do provide a very useful service to society and deserve to be paid for it. The top skateboarders also provide a useful service since a good number of people enjoy watching skatebaording. They are both useful, but in different ways.

January 5, 2010

People can choose their own passions and if an adult has the same passions as your 12 year old cousin, that's their personal choice.

Obviously. But that doesn't mean we have to agree that being passionate about rap, marijuana and skateboarding , is the same as someone who is passionate about curing cancer, building a car or house, creating beautiful art, or even a religion. I think it's silly that i even have to defend this point.

Dentists do provide a very useful service to society and deserve to be paid for it. The top skateboarders also provide a useful service since a good number of people enjoy watching skatebaording. They are both useful, but in different ways.[/Quote]I think we would be more affected if dentist's disappeared from the earth a little faster than skateboarders. Imagine if people 2000 years ago made a skateboard out of coconuts and did that all day instead of creating philosophy, architecture, art, music, science, etc. If the type of man women thought was "cool" predominated on the earth, mankind probably wouldn't even have the wheel.

The fact that a certain demographic thinks skateboarding is cool or useful past 15, doesn't make it so. It's still for babies .

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