Does it change when women get to their 30's?

[InspiredbyYou]

It is not just that relationship but it is the end of it that opened my eyes.

 

 

Well then if it was not just that one relationship then obviously you were the person in charge of inviting those kinds of women into your life.

Your repeated lack of sound judgment is something you should be directly attacking not women in general.

There are millions of men who have not had a track record of attracting nothing but "heart-ache" women so clearly there are good women out there you just have to know how to find them and attract them. Everyone can have a bad experience when it comes to relationships but when it becomes a pattern you can't NOT be held responsible for your choices.

 

I doubt this misogynistic attitude happened over time for you, you've always been like this, let's be honest now. You were at 21 like these bitter kids on this board today, and to all you 21 yr old men out there complaining and whining today have a long hard look at Woggle because that is what you have to look forward to in 10 yrs time if you don't change your stinking attitudes now.

[ella23]

There are tons of men on death row that have women swooning over them. drug dealers constantly have lots of women, nice guys tend to die virgins. Have an explanation?

Well, I can only talk about my own experience. And I can honestly say that I don't know anyone who wants to date a drug dealer. Among my male friends, most of the nice guys have girlfriends. Nice guys tend to die virgins? Come on now.

[InspiredbyYou]

Women can call me a misogynist all they want but my life 10 times better now.

 

 

It shows by how happy and confident you come across!

[betamanlet]

Well, I can only talk about my own experience. And I can honestly say that I don't know anyone who wants to date a drug dealer. Among my male friends, most of the nice guys have girlfriends. Nice guys tend to die virgins? Come on now.

 

 

Every "nice guy" I know is constantly single and not "playing the field".... Every thuggish guy who has a bad boy image, or even a criminal record, is constantly surrounded by women.

 

Will anyone deny here, that you've had the most success with women you have treated the worst?

[stillafool]

Maybe she treated him better than the "prettier" women? Rather than the opposite, I see better looking guys with less attractive looking women.

 

Well if this is the case then he is a happy man and there is nothing to complain about is there?

 

Where I live, it's common to see women large enough to be on the offensive line of the washington redskins to be with in shape guys. Though I think that's the tourists here. I think the locals aren't as that way, but the women are pickier and only want high status men.

 

Well apparently the men who married them are happy. So, these guys didn't go for goodlooking women and are apparently happilly married. So as you can see there are women out there to marry.

You don't HAVE to have a pretty wife to be happy.

[betamanlet]

Well apparently the men who married them are happy. So, these guys didn't go for goodlooking women and are apparently happilly married. So as you can see there are women out there to marry.

You don't HAVE to have a pretty wife to be happy.

The only reason i brought it up is because so many people are claiming that men are so supreficial and only want the most attractive women available, which I observed is absolutely not the case. I would much prefer a less physically attractive woman who had a more attractive personality over some hot chick with a complete attitude.

[ella23]

Is it just me or does anyone else also feel that the problem is not about not being able to find women, but about not being able to find gorgeous women, who are 'good enough'? That seems to be the case judging from some of the posts.

[InspiredbyYou]

Well apparently the men who married them are happy. So, these guys didn't go for goodlooking women and are apparently happilly married. So as you can see there are women out there to marry.

You don't HAVE to have a pretty wife to be happy.

 

that's a bit extreme to suggest that these men should marry or date only non-attractive women to be happy. Let's not go overboard to the other extreme either now!

[InspiredbyYou]

Is it just me or does anyone else also feel that the problem is not about not being able to find women, but about not being able to find gorgeous women, who are 'good enough'? That seems to be the case judging from some of the posts.

 

 

No it's not just you, these men have attitudes of 3's at best who want to find women with attitudes and bodies of a 10.

[betamanlet]

Is it just me or does anyone else also feel that the problem is not about not being able to find women, but about not being able to find gorgeous women, who are 'good enough'? That seems to be the case judging from some of the posts.

 

 

Nope. About the only physical requirement guys I know have is just for her to not be obese. Women have much higher standards re: income, status, height, looks..

 

 

Like I said, i see much more attractive men with less attractive women all the time where I live.

[InspiredbyYou]

I'm going to say it and end of story:

 

You guys with your extremist and victim attitudes just don't have what it takes to attract healthy attractive women, so unless you work on your attitudes you will never land the kind of women you desire.

The end.

 

That's the bottom line. I'm nothing special but I would rather poke my own eyes out than to have to go out with any guy that has issues as big as some of you show on here, so if I am nothing special and I feel this way imagine the special ladies you want to get with and how they feel?

[betamanlet]

I'm going to say it and end of story:

 

You guys with your extremist and victim attitudes just don't have what it takes to attract healthy attractive women, so unless you work on your attitudes you will never land the kind of women you desire.

The end.

 

That's the bottom line. I'm nothing special but I would rather poke my own eyes out than to have to go out with any guy that has issues as big as some of you show on here, so if I am nothing special and I feel this way imagine the special ladies you want to get with and how they feel?

 

 

Would you rather date a serial killer than one of us?

 

How come guys have to put up with all of the issues that women have, or else we are pigs?

[InspiredbyYou]

About the only physical requirement guys I know have is just for her to not be obese.

 

 

Is that really the only guys have? If so then why are you wasting my time with chatter, you should be with a girl right now there are millions, no billions of women, who fit that description, you mean to tell me out of a million women you can't find one who will date you?

[ella23]

Would you rather date a serial killer than one of us?

 

How come guys have to put up with all of the issues that women have, or else we are pigs?

At least come up with some decent examples. You don't seriously believe that most women want go out with drug dealers, serial killers and prisoners?

[betamanlet]

Is that really the only guys have? If so then why are you wasting my time with chatter, you should be with a girl right now there are millions, no billions of women, who fit that description, you mean to tell me out of a million women you can't find one who will date you?

 

If you claim that men are as shallow as you think I challenge you to find a single guy on here, or in person who prefers breast implants, yet women rush out to get them, despite how stupid that being (sticking foreign objects into your body). I'd rather be with someone who was completely flat chested than someone who has breast implants. And don't blame it on men that women get breast implants. I don't know any guy outside of a stripclub that prefers them.

[betamanlet]

At least come up with some decent examples. You don't seriously believe that most women want go out with drug dealers, serial killers and prisoners?

 

 

I'm not saying most women would go out with drug dealers, serial killers, or prisoners. I'm just saying there are more women who find those guys desirable than they find nice guy betas desirable.

[ella23]

I'm not saying most women would go out with drug dealers, serial killers, or prisoners. I'm just saying there are more women who find those guys desirable than they find nice guy betas desirable.

Honestly, every single woman I know would rather be with a nice beta guy than someone with a criminal record. Maybe you need to go after other women.

[betamanlet]

Honestly, every single woman I know would rather be with a nice beta guy than someone with a criminal record. Maybe you need to go after other women.

 

 

Where do you live? OR are these women just saying it? Virtually every woman says she wants a nice guy, but what she goes for isn't what she says she wants.

 

So these women who you say would rather be with nice guys, do they in fact date nice guys, or just say they want to date nice guys?

[ella23]

Where do you live? OR are these women just saying it? Virtually every woman says she wants a nice guy, but what she goes for isn't what she says she wants.

 

So these women who you say would rather be with nice guys, do they in fact date nice guys, or just say they want to date nice guys?

They go for bad guys for flings but mostly have relationships with nice guys, because they want to be treated well. So they aren't just saying that. It has nothing to do with where anyone lives, you're probably going after the wrong women.

[InspiredbyYou]

Would you rather date a serial killer than one of us?

 

 

 

Well if you are going to hold the proverbial gun to my head of course I would date you.

 

Look, you guys are totally datable, not now not like this with your current stinking tudes, but you can be "saved" But you need to believe it and you need to recognize your value. When you hate on women, you are simply projecting your own dissatisfaction with yourselves and you are perpetuating your own failure.

 

Instead of looking at extreme examples of how to be, or cartoon examples of what successful men are like, why don't you model yourselves after the decent men who have a good balance of what healthy desirable women really want?

 

I think the problem is not all the filthy women out there but the lack of solid male role models in your lives.

[GoodOnPaper]

They go for bad guys for flings but mostly have relationships with nice guys

 

So the nice guys get the responsibility and stress and the bad guys get the unlimited sex -- doesn't sound like a very good deal . . .

[ella23]

So the nice guys get the responsibility and stress and the bad guys get the unlimited sex -- doesn't sound like a very good deal . . .

That doesn't mean that they never have flings with the good guys. What I'm trying to say they find the nice guys more attractive than the bad ones. And I'm talking about women in the age range of 19-23 mostly. If at even this age, a lot of them prefer nice guys, surely the 30+ women (the ones this thread is about) are even more likely to go for the nice guys?

[DolceVenganza]

> Reading much of this thread - I continuously wonder where men are meeting such women. Women will never have a problem meeting men, but meeting prince charming will take quite a bit of work to match many of their exhausting standards.

 

> As a guy, I often wonder what makes men think "Gee, I've been wronged, a beautiful, healthy woman should reach out to me for all the wrong that has been done to me to make me feel better," rather than persue her. Truth be told, your target of opportunity, your new beauty, has little care for how women have gamed you in the past. That is baggage and too much won't get you very far.

 

Each time you choose to meet women, you must be present in a new day, with a new mindset, as if the old pains never happened. Let go of your "identifications" with how past women behaved, learn, live, love and move on. This life is WAY TOO SHORT for people to be accumulating a base of pain and narrowly defining their reality, thus squashing out chances with new women (or men).

 

> Women do not want bad boys or nice guys, they want men in touch with their masculine essence, as men want women in touch with their feminine essence. I will submit that the media/tv/books/magazines have done a fantastic job at modifying the behaviors of men AND women.

 

Rather than art imitating life, life imitates art. Artists had previously sought to communicate the 'human condition,' but as was evidenced in the movie "Network," people believe tv and such to be more real than our own lives. Thus when it becomes time to make decisions and act, rather than reference than own inner judgement or self or their childhood experiences, they dig into a tainted self, warped from years of modification by the media, schooling, etc.

 

Control of 'what people think' predates Joseph Goebbels and the Persian system of schooling - being aware of the 'water you are in as a fish' allows you, the human thinker, to decide WHAT you think - most, however, do not choose what to think, if they bother to think, rather than react at all.

 

> I would suggest that if men are having problem relating to women, they do some self-study similar to what PUA artists used to do during the 80's and 90's. Here's just 'some' of the areas in which PUAs used to and still do study:

 

-self

-expressions, communication

-what they think, what they feel

-confronting their past and any lingering demons

-working out, developing a personal style

-improving one's life holistically

-palmistry, massages, cooking, etc

-biological and physiological mating

-the selfish gene

-human mating behaviors

-spiritual study

-meditation and yoga

 

I know this because I went to the core and source of what they did after many infuriating years as a HS teen who had lackluster dates. I was fortunate that women approached me then, but not ones that I had any real chemistry or zest with.

 

So rather than 'linger' on what ailed me, I went at doing what women might want, what might make me more attractive a partner, what *I* enjoyed, because ultimately the PUA (regardless of your gut reaction), begins with himself and works on that. THEN, he begins to master human interaction, such as approaching women in various settings.

 

Often times when I read such boards as these I heard an undercurrent of "I'm too weak to change or deal with difficult situations, I want everything to conform to me!" Well ya know what? If everything was so easy, everyone would do it. Everyone would be a corporate CEO or lawyer, marry a wonderful man or woman, and have a great life. But good things take work. None of us are born perfect, thus we need to "CHANGE."

 

Human interaction isn't logical, it's emotional, yet many men become frustrated and angry because the equation of what he feels should attract women is not working.

 

--------------------------------

 

This whole game of human mating, interaction, and attraction ultimately boils down to you. Life owes nobody anything. Human empathy often leads to people giving to people out of their own goodness, but nothing of this planet requires it.

 

Men or women need only 1 partner to say yes, so be asking 100 people. Over time, you will get a feel for how to deal with different women and if on the first date or first interaction it is going anywhere. But having a negative mindset of "women are to blame" is a victim game men have NEVER played - its highly unattractive, weak, and puts responsibility on the accused.

 

If men are to begin to change, they have to accept full responsibility and make it happen.

[Eve]

Well, I have been here a while and never ventured too far into this area of the board... mainly because I am happily married. Now I fully understand why the spin off threads occur where women posters poke fun! My goodness! What a lot of bitter people! As one who is nearly 38 I would just like to say that men and women make mistakes at various stages of thier lives. Some mistakes cannot be fixed but the battle should be to never repeat those errors within someone elses life. It makes me sad to think of people being so twisted and hateful.

 

I think most people want the same thing but get side tracked in one way or another. Those who recover the quickest have the better advantage... but at the core one should not think they are entitled to enter the life of a decent person without carrying the same intentions and emotional qualifications. It doesnt fit.

 

I hope that somehow those who are hurting find a way to heal. So sad...

 

Take care,

Eve xx

[Ruby Slippers]

All the things that you men are complaining about women for are things that men have been doing for centuries. Going for the hottie with the body over the person with brains/character, and trading up for a shinier model are behaviors that men have spent many years perfecting.

 

Now that women have more freedom, power, and money than ever before, no surprise, some of them are doing the same thing -- treating men as commodities to fulfill their needs, in the short or long term. Hey, the boys taught them well.

 

A certain percentage of humans, whether male or female, will always behave this way, choosing a partner based on physical strengths/appearance above all, provided they have the means to do so. (And, newsflash, the women in that subset were probably the ones boffing the hot gardener/refrigerator repair man/plumber when they were stuck in the house all day. Now it's all coming out into the open.)

 

Not all men are like this, and not all women are like this. But it IS a time of change and shifting power dynamics in the world. As with any such sea change, though, it can be approached as an opportunity.

 

Step out from behind your fears and find the opportunities.