Does it change when women get to their 30's?

January 5, 2010

Abstraction about what is valuable and great and what isn't is the key to downfall. Towards the end of their empire the Romans had a passion for banal and stupid things too, America is headed for a similar fate (thank god).

Have you watched a Bollywood film? Have you been to a night club in Tel aviv or watched one of their soaps on tv? Have you used a vending machine in Japan or witnessed a live Tokyo Teenie shoot? watched a bullfight or participated in La Tomatina in Spain, a cohk fight in Mexico, made vodka amongst men in Russia and had to drink until you passed out because otherwise it is was considered weak, gone on a partridge shoot in England? I'll stop there, you get the point. Wanna talk about banal....that's entertainment for you, and if you think it is exclusive to America then you need to get out more.

Well I don't want to sway completely off topic, but modern tendency of abstract art is an embarrassment to real art. Picasso's 'art' is ugly and makes little sense. Then again we live in a world where people think Michael jackson singing over a synthesized beat is the spiritual equivelant to beauty of Bach's Seasons.

My point is that arguing about what makes for good entertainment and what does not is like arguing over what number is better, "ooh I like 23, yeah but 54 is so much better" It's a personal opinion and it has little bearings on intelligence, it is just a matter of what type of escape you

prefer.

What about Yo-Yo's ? There are professional leagues of Yo-Yo's, Yo-Yo professionals who get financial endorsements from Yo-Yo companies, is being a professional Yo-Yo player "cool" or worthy of respect? What about that kid who dropped out of school to pursue a career as a professional Guitar Hero player, he was making a living many adults only dream of doing this, do you think this is admirable?

Do it! There are world competitions for rubics cube champions too. In their community I am sure they feel respected Whatev, if you enjoy it and there is money to be made (bonus), and you are good at it do as the Nike ads and JUST DO IT!

Again, down to money. Making a lot of money does not make a great or admirable person, in my opinion. Nor does it mean they contribute anything worthwhile to the world. I can write a whole library of books as to why not

.

What do you think of people who continually contribute poisonous posts on a public forum about the opposite sex? Is that a good contribution to society?

I'm just sayin'.....

At any rate despite having had a good run with my little extreme athletes when it was time to settle down and think more seriously about love, relationships and a future, that didn't cut it for me anymore. It's one thing to have fun and enjoy things when you are 23 and it's another to want more serious ties as you mature.

So there is still hope for your future yet, some of the women you wish you had now, that are with the Johnny Knoxville types will come around after 25 possibly. Then again with a lot of cry babies being over 25, for a woman, is just not good enough anymore. Just as they complain about the superficiality of some women who pass by good guys to go out with the "badboys" they are the exact same version of these women in male form.

It's not a question of being better than anyone, some people are just quicker and better at getting what they want in life. That's all.

I AM a firm believer of that.

Edited January 5, 2010 by InspiredbyYou

January 5, 2010

Have you watched a Bollywood film? Have you been to a night club in Tel-aviv or watched one of their soaps on tv? Have you used a vending machine in Japan or witnessed a live Tokyo Teenie shoot? watched a bullfight or participated in La Tomatina in Spain, a cohk fight in Mexico, made vodka amongst men in Russia and had to drink until you passed out because otherwise it is was considered weak, gone on a partridge shoot in England? I'll stop there, you get the point. Wanna talk about banal....that's entertainment for you, and if you think it is exclusive to America then you need to get out more.[/Quote]

Things like bullfighting and making vodka are completely different from the type of things people in America find entertaining. It's not a question of whether I like something or not either, it's about the kind of entertainment it offers. I personally think bullfighting is barbaric, and if it was up to me it would be banned, but it has a point, bullfighting is an old Spanish tradition that tests one's manhood. Watching a man test his wits against a very dangerous animal is indeed thrilling to watch. Making vodka is a bonding experience, especially when you drink the fruits of your own labor after!
These things are not aimed at little kids, they're ways for grown men to entertain themselves.

Skateboarding is still for babies.

My point is that arguing about what makes for good entertainment and what does not is like arguing over what number is better, "ooh I like 23, yeah but 54 is so much better" It's a personal opinion and it has little bearings on intelligence, it is just a matter of what type of escape you
prefer. [/Quote]

Thanks for completely ignoring my good and intelligent point, even after I addressed the predictable point you made here in advance.

Do it! There are world competitions for rubics cube champions too. In their community I am sure they feel respected Whatev, if you enjoy it and there is money to be made (bonus), and you are good at it do as the Nike ads and JUST DO IT![/Quote]

Again, ignored my post. Do you think professional Yo-Yo players are cool? The only difference between playing YoYo and riding a skateboard is that skateboarders tend to be hotter and use drugs. Simply because someone is hot, little girl, doesn't mean they aren't dumb and should be looked down on.

At any rate despite having had a good run with my little extreme athletes when it was time to settle down and think more seriously about love, relationships and a future, that didn't cut it for me anymore. It's one thing to have fun and enjoy things when you are 23 and it's another to want more serious ties as you mature.

So there is still hope for your future yet, some of the women you wish you had now, that are with the Johnny Knoxville types will come around after 25 possibly. Then again with a lot of cry babies being over 25, for a woman, is just not good enough anymore. Just as they complain about the superficiality of some women who pass by good guys to go out with the "badboys" they are the exact same version of these women in male form.

It's not a question of being better than anyone, some people are just quicker and better at getting what they want in life. That's all.

I AM a firm believer of that.[/Quote]

We don't want you.

January 5, 2010

This is true, but the frustrating thing is that 2 of every 3 women I meet fall under this category.

Not at all. Do you guys think this girl is so "hot" that she is unattainable? http://c2.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/67/l_7dc35f0407b8872abc99ef3e1517e9b9.jpg

She was attractive to me sure, but her personality is what made me want her. But of course, after spending time getting to know her and falling in love, I find out she has a ****ing boyfriend. Rinse and repeat 3 or 4 more times and that's the story of my life.

No, but I think she thinks she thinks she is so hot that she's unobtainable. I can see it in the pose and the way she's looking at the camera. Whether she's unobtainable or not is besides the point, she sees herself as a certain type of person and so becomes that.

Don't waste too much time 'getting to know girls', you will get instantly friendzoned, or find out later that they have a boyfriend. Leap in there and ask them out, on a date, or express an interest sooner rather than later - before you fall for them from afar only to get rejected (and yes, this has happend to me with guys).

It sucks to be rejected, and especially over and over. But instead of HATING the guys that get the girls, and HATING the girls as well, just look at some things you can change about yourself. Not your innate self, but just pick and choose bits and pieces from others that will work for you. Don't be a fake, be yourself with pride, but if what you are doing isn't working, change something. For instance, I used to be too embarrassed to flirt in front of others, to flirt in front of friends, to flirt full stop and got so frustrated that men weren't interested in me, but how could they be? I was just invisible to them because I did nothing, gave no indication that I was interested or sexy etc and so got ignored and got bitter. But ultimately no matter how much I grumbled about men, the problem was actually mine.

So, slowly (took a looong time) I just trained myself to get used to flirting and not feel like an idiot or embarrassed. Now it feels like a normal thing to do and things have changed for me. So, why not just add some needed skills to what you've already got? This doesn't mean you're not great as you are, but never any harm in fixing 'glitches' that are causing all of us more pain than good.

January 5, 2010

Obviously. But that doesn't mean we have to agree that being passionate about rap, marijuana and skateboarding , is the same as someone who is passionate about curing cancer, building a car or house, creating beautiful art, or even a religion. I think it's silly that i even have to defend this point.

I think we would be more affected if dentist's disappeared from the earth a little faster than skateboarders. Imagine if people 2000 years ago made a skateboard out of coconuts and did that all day instead of creating philosophy, architecture, art, music, science, etc. If the type of man women thought was "cool" predominated on the earth, mankind probably wouldn't even have the wheel.

The fact that a certain demographic thinks skateboarding is cool or useful past 15, doesn't make it so. It's still for babies .

You are completely missing the point.

There is a demand by almost the whole population for dentists (even though most of us hate going, we want to keep our teeth). For this reason there are many many thousands of dentists who make a living at it.

There is also a demand from a good number of people to watch skateboarding. If you don't like skateboarding, then please don't watch it. Some people enjoy it. In fact, enough enjoy it that there's a market for professionals. You don't get to choose other people's hobbies.

January 5, 2010

We don't want you.

Then who do you want and what's stopping you from getting her?

January 5, 2010

No, but I think she thinks she thinks she is so hot that she's unobtainable. I can see it in the pose and the way she's looking at the camera. Whether she's unobtainable or not is besides the point, she sees herself as a certain type of person and so becomes that. [/Quote]Ahh, exactly my point. Do you see what I'm saying? My struggle is not that i'm going after the really hot girls and they're rejecting me, but rather that I'm going after girls who are like me, and they already are taken or want someone "hotter". This has been my experience every time with no exception.

Don't waste too much time 'getting to know girls', you will get instantly friendzoned, or find out later that they have a boyfriend. Leap in there and ask them out, on a date, or express an interest sooner rather than later - before you fall for them from afar only to get rejected (and yes, this has happend to me with guys). [/Quote]My problem is that I do not like most women's personalities (and they don't like me), so I like to get to know them first before asking them out on a date to see if I can see myself with her. And I don't buy the friendzone crap, this girl in particular that i mentioned felt the same way I did for her, but for whatever reason dropped off the face of the earth (probably to cut me out of her life and stay with her whigger pothead boyfriend). If a girl likes you physically and your character, she won't friendzone you no matter what.

It sucks to be rejected, and especially over and over. But instead of HATING the guys that get the girls, and HATING the girls as well, just look at some things you can change about yourself.[/Quote]I only hate certain guys who get girls and the girls who go for them.

There is very little to change about myself, except maybe getting more muscular I guess. (I've lost muscle due to giving up weight lifting) The girls I liked who didn't think I was their "type" is because I am 5'7, and I can't change my height. The others it's because they had boyfriends. CAn't change that either.

Not your innate self, but just pick and choose bits and pieces from others that will work for you. Don't be a fake, be yourself with pride, but if what you are doing isn't working, change something.[/Quote]Other than becomming the stereotypical club going frat boy type, what do you want me to do? The type of changes I think you are implying would only attract the kind of woman I don't want.

For instance, I used to be too embarrassed to flirt in front of others, to flirt in front of friends, to flirt full stop and got so frustrated that men weren't interested in me, but how could they be? I was just invisible to them because I did nothing, gave no indication that I was interested or sexy etc and so got ignored and got bitter. But ultimately no matter how much I grumbled about men, the problem was actually mine.[/Quote]It's different for girls.

So, slowly (took a looong time) I just trained myself to get used to flirting and not feel like an idiot or embarrassed. Now it feels like a normal thing to do and things have changed for me. So, why not just add some needed skills to what you've already got? This doesn't mean you're not great as you are, but never any harm in fixing 'glitches' that are causing all of us more pain than good.[/Quote]Like what? I make acquaintances with people I like, can make people laugh, have a wide range of conversational topics, a lot of interests and passions, have nice hair, have an artistic side, am self-assured and confident, have atleast passable looks, have decent hygiene, and dress in clothes that fit me, I don't think there is anything else I can do to make me a better catch.

January 5, 2010

Are you the Passion Licensing Committee? You must be chair of the board. I often wondered who regulated and determined people's passions? I'm glad to make your acquaintance, how many passionate fools' rights did you revoke today?

We better watch out!

If I write down my list of passions, cognac may cross out a few and I can't be passionate about them anymore! After all, he is the entire Passion Licensing Committee.

January 5, 2010

Again, ignored my post. Do you think professional Yo-Yo players are cool? The only difference between playing YoYo and riding a skateboard is that skateboarders tend to be hotter and use drugs. Simply because someone is hot, little girl, doesn't mean they aren't dumb and should be looked down on.

.

I don't know if they are I have never had the pleasure of meeting one. But if I had to guess I would say no, as opposed to extreme athletes who put their life's at risk (stupidly nonetheless) to contort their bodies in certain ways to master a skill, I don't see yoyo'ing as a very macho, testosterone laden sexy sport. It could change of course and I am no longer 25, so what appeals to 25 yr olds today may not necessarily be what appealed to me when I was 25.

I didn't ignore your other post because it was brilliant, quite the opposite. Sorry.

January 5, 2010

We better watch out!

If I write down my list of passions, cognac may cross out a few and I can't be passionate about them anymore! After all, he is the entire Passion Licensing Committee.

Oh I have a feeling I know of a few others who sit on this panel. Hang out here a bit TGM and you can pretty much see who the entire governing body is.

January 5, 2010

Oh I have a feeling I know of a few others who sit on this panel. Hang out here a bit TGM and you can pretty much see who the entire governing body is.

I can only imagine who may be on it. I wonder if there will be enough votes to overrule cognac.

January 5, 2010

I don't know if they are I have never had the pleasure of meeting one. But if I had to guess I would say no, as opposed to extreme athletes who put their life's at risk (stupidly nonetheless) to contort their bodies in certain ways to master a skill, I don't see yoyo'ing as a very macho, testosterone laden sexy sport. It could change of course and I am no longer 25, so what appeals to 25 yr olds today may not necessarily be what appealed to me when I was 25.

I didn't ignore your other post because it was brilliant, quite the opposite. Sorry.

You're arguing with him, but you're essentially agreeing with his point, that those who are passionate about yo-yo'ing (is that even a word? ) are less attractive than those whose passions lie in what's traditionally defined as more masculine (or at least is associated with higher status if you don't consider skateboarding masculine).

January 5, 2010

Cognac is from Cork, Ireland

January 5, 2010

You're arguing with him, but you're essentially agreeing with his point, that those who are passionate about yo-yo'ing (is that even a word? ) are less attractive than those whose passions lie in what's traditionally defined as more masculine (or at least is associated with higher status if you don't consider skateboarding masculine).

So? I don't get your point. My point is still the same one and not sure what you are trying to get at.

he asked me if I thought it would be a hot passion to have, essentially. My guess is no. But by no means does that mean someone should not follow their passion, just because it won't be a chick magnet? Follow your passion because you are good at it and it makes you happy, not with the sole underhanded intent to bed chicks. Duhhh!

January 5, 2010

cognac:
Women are responsible for so many men here feeling insecure, because women are too damned picky. If you're not a "super hot guy" women will invent a flaw for you. Women derive the whole value of themselves and others by their physical appearance, regardless of what they type here on this forum. Men do judge women too, but it's not nearly as thorough and cold, with a man, if you have an OK face, an OK personality, and an OK body, you are probably in.

A woman can’t force you to feel insecure and inadequate unless you already felt this way to begin with. I do not know anyone of my friends, nor myself, that is holding out for a “super hot guy”. I have turned down all kinds of men and have been turned down by all kinds of men. Not just “super hot guys”. Hell, I had a crush on a over weight, 39 year old man and he turned me down and I am a heck of alot hot then he was.

I will say what woman want is someone that likes women. And likes them more for their body and youth. That is something that is clearly missing from quite a few men from this board. And that is what is really sad.

As for men not being nearly as judgy on looks as women or as cold? I think porn is a pretty cold judgement of women’s looks. I think most male oriented media’s show a very cold outlook and judgement on woman’s looks. Who here has not heard a man at one point or another place the value of a woman in her chest size and waist size. Who here hasn’t heard one of their male friends make a derogatory comment about a woman about “how they would hit it, and toss it”. Or something to that affect. Spare me the “boo hoo” I’m not as pretty as a Jonas brother. You do NOT have this tribulation coined. And what you also fail to understand is that women don’t want a man who finds her “okay”. So maybe that is also part of the problem. I’ve said it a million times here. Women have an INATE desire to beautiful to their man. If we know by a man’s words or treatment that he finds us just “okay” or just above subpar enough to date, then we are going to know intuitively and we are not going to want to entertain him. Especially when we see that same man that thought we are “okay” enough turn to millions of other entertainment avenues to indulge himself in “hot women”. But you don’t really care about any of that do you?

What we are arguing however, is that if you meet a 6'3 guy with spikey hair and muscles who is a bully, uses drugs, has little intelligence and a scumbag, and you meet a 5'8 guy with an athletic build who is decent looking, intelligent, funny and confident, give the second guy a chance for once. Nobody is asking for you to date UGLY, fat, or boring guys, we're just asking you to put a more logical focus on looks, rather than making one night stands with the "hottest guys" you can find your only goal in your 20's.

If a man meets a high maintenance supermodel, and a cute girl next door who loves him for him, 9/10 times girl next door is in. For women it's the other way around. For women, more is always better, they can never have enough, they are avarice embodied. Just ask Adam and Eve.

What you painted is such a caricature. I don’t know any woman that is currently dating a 6’3 abusive jerk with spikey hair. Or has passed up a truely good catch at 5’8.

Alot of men have that same goal in their 20s, 30s and early 40s. They want to make their goal how many women they can be with, without committing. Men aren't exactly big on committing to one woman anymore. Why are you not bemoaning the injustice in that?

Oh and I am SO glad you used a Bibical reference. You do realize that both Adam and Eve sinned equally correct? You can not possibly believe that God only thought Eve sinned or that Eve was to blame for Adam’s sin do you? To insinuate that it was all Eve’s fault is exactly the sin Adam had accured. Let me give you a little Bibical lesson. Eve’s sin was not having trust or enough belief in God. She thought he was holding out on her and ignored his creed to take the apple. But Adam is also at fault. Because he knew what Eve was doing was wrong and he failed to stand up for her AND himself. He failed to protect both of them. And she failed to have the trust in God she should have. Now think about current day issues that men and women struggle with and see how handily that correlates.

The problem is this, that everyone from plain jane to sandra bullock fantasize about the same kind of guy. Most plain jane's would rather have 2 minutes in a seedy hotel with the ed hardy shirt wearing, fake tanned, spikey haired, BMW driving cocaine dealer, than go out on a date with a normal guy.

Keep telling yourself that because it makes you feel better about your own dating failures.

January 5, 2010

All I know is I'm 25, dating the quintessential nice guy and I am becoming more disinterested and distant by the passing day. Here is my analysis of my situation in particular (I cannot speak for the masses):

-He ****ing ASKS to kiss me, ASKS to grab my ass, puke. Just do it damnit.

-I cannot remember a time he has ever said no to something

-He clears his schedule, rearranges his pre-made plans, just to be with me (and we've been dating 4 months)

I really enjoyed dating him in the beginning but he has become more clingy everyday. From all my experience it seems I can only find guys like this or guys who are so cold that you are constantly guessing. Considering that all people want what they can't have (men included) I suppose is the reason I enjoy the latter more than the situation I'm in now. Someday I hope to find someone who strikes that balance of a little sweet and a little spicy.

January 5, 2010

There is a reason why people don't get millions in sponsorship dollars to spin a yoyo, no one thinks that's entertaining enough to build a business around it. Watching some guy on a board with wheels, or a board on the snow doing crazy flips in the air or catching rails when he could easily crack his head open is pretty darn entertaining.

If you think watching men in dangerous activities for the pleasure of the masses is something created today, you need to look up Roman Colosseum and Gladiators. Yoyo tricks would get eaten alive, even back then.

January 5, 2010

Many men like to look at porn but we know it is a fantasy and even that I can't stand modern porn. I have looked at old Playboys from back in the day and the women looked so much better. What do women these days have against looking like real humans? Women like Pamela Anderson are ugly to me.

Women on the other hand watch these romance movies and read these books thinking real life is actually like that and god help a man if he can't deliver it.

Many do not want to commit but when you look at the walkaway wife trend and read the divorce horror stories on this board can you blame them? What rational person wants to jump into something as volatile and unstable as modern relationships are for a man?

January 5, 2010

-He ****ing ASKS to kiss me, ASKS to grab my ass, puke. Just do it damnit.

OH GOD I know exactly the type.

An any guy who thinks it's bitchy to think this way and that we women just want jerks who will mistreat us, all I ask is that you walk a mile in the shoes of someone who is with someone who is not only too nice for their own good, but who is also suffocatingly predictable. THEN tell me about it!

Balance is all a person really wants, anyone who thinks that extremes are good has severe issues. Being with someone who is that nice and predictable is the exact same think as being a complete jerk, it just sits on the opposite sides of the spectrum but the outcome is still very undesirable.

January 5, 2010

So if a man does not force himself on you then he is unattractive? Years of no means no feminist propoganda have created the type of man you describe.

January 5, 2010

And for pity's sake let that type of man still be around in the world, because some of us actually mean it when we say no!

January 5, 2010

And for pity's sake let that type of man still be around in the world, because some of us actually mean it when we say no!

True but according some women on here if a man respects those boundaries he is too nice.

January 5, 2010

All I know is I'm 25, dating the quintessential nice guy and I am becoming more disinterested and distant by the passing day. Here is my analysis of my situation in particular (I cannot speak for the masses):

-He ****ing ASKS to kiss me, ASKS to grab my ass, puke. Just do it damnit.
-I cannot remember a time he has ever said no to something
-He clears his schedule, rearranges his pre-made plans, just to be with me (and we've been dating 4 months)

I really enjoyed dating him in the beginning but he has become more clingy everyday. From all my experience it seems I can only find guys like this or guys who are so cold that you are constantly guessing. Considering that all people want what they can't have (men included) I suppose is the reason I enjoy the latter more than the situation I'm in now. Someday I hope to find someone who strikes that balance of a little sweet and a little spicy.

There are many men in between the extremes. You just have to find one and that could take a number of tries.

I don't agree that all people want what they can't have. Many people are in happy relationships and marriages.

January 5, 2010

So if a man does not force himself on you then he is unattractive?

Woggle don't act stupid, do you ask your wife for permission to kiss her? When you are feeling frisky and playful do you sneak up behind her and tap her on the shoulder and say "can I pinch your bum, I'm feeling flirty?" or do you just go up to her smack her in the ass, like a man who is wanting to flirt with his woman does?

She was talking about her boyfriend not some random douche on the street. Get real!

How you always manage to take every single point to a nebulous height that also happens to be in the same atmospheric tier as your one track minded cloud of misogynistic gas, is not only predictable it is actually making me wonder if there isn't some deep male-ware happening here and I should actually try to be more patient with the handicapped.

January 5, 2010

So if a man does not force himself on you then he is unattractive? Years of no means no feminist propoganda have created the type of man you describe.

That's NOT what the women are saying here. They are saying don't ask for permission for everything you do.

If you try to kiss them and they don't want it, I'm sure they will make it obvious. If you persist anyway, that's forcing yourself on them.

January 5, 2010

So a woman in a relationship is now a man's property? Marital rape laws should no longer apply? I thought married women hated when a man felt he was entitled to their bodies.

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