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Could really use outside on the matter of ex-girlfriend?

JSEAN

By JSEAN
in Second Chances

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JSEAN New Member

JSEAN

Posted
Posted (edited)

Okay, this is not something I would normally do, but this has somewhat been driving me crazy the past few days so I could use your opinions guys.

 

I once had a girlfriend whom I met when we were set up at the prom back in high school. We had instant chemistry when we met and I loved being around her. I was 18 back then, and she was 17.

 

We were together for 2 1/2 years, from my senior year in high school up to the early days of my third year in college. She was my first serious relationship and vice versa so as expected, we were both very immature. We'd fight constantly over small things, and broke up a couple of times and then got back together. Regardless of all this, she was just so much fun to be around and up until now, she's the only person whom I can say really knows me.

 

We finally broke up after one of our usual fights and I said a lot of harsh things. It was a mutual break up. A couple of weeks later I asked for her back and she said it was too late. That it wouldn't make sense anymore for us to keep trying. I didn't listen. For 4 months I tried winning her back. A no every time. I then decided to move on, and she had a new boyfriend. I stopped talking to her and lived my life. I was a huge mess after our break up and slowly but surely, I recovered.

 

FASTFORWARD to 2 years later. I graduated college, now have my own successful business, dated tons of girls and am now seeing someone whom I really like and is crazy about me.

 

Recently though, me and my ex got in touch and have been hanging out. Also found out that she and her boyfriend are over. For the past 2 months, I'd visit her at her place, we'd talk for hours. She loves travelling to beaches and all so she'd always ask me if I wanted to go with her and her friends. I'm very busy with my business so I'd casually decline. So we see each other every couple of weeks and just a couple of days ago, she asked me if I wanted to 'catch up' when in fact, we've been catching up so much already. We hung out from 9 PM to the wee hours of the morning and she'd say that 'you're so cool now that we're friends' and would repeatedly say 'you're so awesome' and that she thinks I've grown up and have achieved so much at my young age. Whenever I would ask her about her ex, she'd mention that they would often fight because deep inside, she was comparing him to me. That last night we hung out, she asked how it was going with this new girl of mine and I said pretty well. Part of the night, she'd keep talking about the guys that she's gone out with and even show me pictures on the computer and asked me what I thought. She also asked to see pictures of all the girls that I've dated since we broke up.

 

IT WAS THAT NIGHT that I started feeling something coming back. And I didn't like it because I remembered how bad it hurt when I lost her. I enjoy being with her. I feel like I'm home whenever when spend time together and she just completely gets me, and vice versa. I'm now 23 but I feel like she's the love of my life, but I can't risk looking stupid again if she only sees me as a friend and besides, I also have to think about my current girl, who's invested so much emotions on me already. Right now, the confidence and the swagger that I've gained from our break up is gone, and I'm going crazy thinking about her. I need advice and I need to settle this soon. I can't work and I can't get started on my new venture as well because I keep thinking about her.

 

The question is, do you guys think she's still interested? Or does she just really like hanging out with me as a friend?

 

IF NOT, then I plan to stop talking to her so that this mess in my heart will stop and I can just go on with my life before we started being close again.

Edited by JSEAN
Chingaling Established Member

Chingaling

Posted
Posted

Ask her.

 

Don't let the chance get away.

 

If you don't ask, you'll never know, and trust me... it will haunt you forever.

 

Good luck....

RBA80 New Member

RBA80

Posted
Posted

Yea, I think so. I mean sometime we have to be apart for a while before we realize what we really want out of life. Things change and people change even if you've know them forever. People change and learn from their mistakes.

  • 4 weeks later...
Wolf710 New Member

Wolf710

Posted
Posted

Hi. I was just wondering how things ended up. Going through a tough time now with a girl that wants a break.

Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

Posted
Posted

The question is, do you guys think she's still interested? Or does she just really like hanging out with me as a friend?

 

WOW... how are we suppose to know that for sure...

The best way to find out is to actually ask HER ...

Kamille Established Member

Kamille

Posted
Posted (edited)

 

I'm now 23 but I feel like she's the love of my life, but I can't risk looking stupid again if she only sees me as a friend

 

If she sees you as a friend, then she respects you enough not to think 'you're stupid' because you have feelings for her. Tell her - try that - try building a friendship with her. It doesn't mean you can't also be more than friends. For a lot of people, friendship is the basis of love. Especially in long term relationships. And you two have known each other for a long time.

 

 

 

Respect and communication are key, whether in love or friendship.

 

 

and besides, I also have to think about my current girl, who's invested so much emotions on me already.

 

 

How much emotion have you invested in the current girl? If you don't think you can feel for her what you feel for your ex, then the right thing to do is to let current girl go.

Edited by Kamille
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