LonelyGuy85 Posted December 31, 2009 Share Posted December 31, 2009 Long story short, i got rid of all my friends about a year ago, but since then i have had a lot of trouble making new friends. I have made some 'friends' at work but the truth is that although i have done a few things with them outside of work i wouldn't call any of them my friends, simply because the frequency within which we do things is so far apart, over a month sometimes. It's made especially more confusing when one of my 'friends' actually invited me out with her a few times with her friends to town in the night. This happened a few months back but not much has happened between us since then. My biggest issue is that my other work 'friends' are the ones who instigate us going out, but that is only because they seem to invite other people along with their friends, so they already have plans in place and they simply are inviting us out with them. I am pretty sure that one of the reasons that she hasn't instigated more things outside work with me is because i don't try and do more things with her. This is because i can't invite any of these friends along with me because i don't have any friends anymore, so i am unable to invite them along to anything as it's not as simple as 'doing xxxx with me and my friends' Is there a good way to overcome this? I am really starting to feel lonely here and this is only made worse today by it being New Years Eve and even though i know these people are out having fun tonight, i am sitting here in the house, alone, again. Link to post Share on other sites
ordinary_girl Posted December 31, 2009 Share Posted December 31, 2009 this is probably all related to why you got rid of your old friends in the first place Link to post Share on other sites
Author LonelyGuy85 Posted January 1, 2010 Author Share Posted January 1, 2010 Well, i originally got rid of my friends because i realised that they weren't really my friends at all. It was more a convenience than a genuine friendship. I realised that we were different than when we first met years ago. They would constantly put me down and make me feel so bad about myself. Since getting rid of them my self worth has increased but i still find it hard to make new friends. Link to post Share on other sites
Green Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 you don't need friends to invite people out to do things. If you want to see a movie just invite people to the movie with you. If you want to go to a resteraunt just invite people with you. If you always want to go to a theme park......... well you get the picture.... yes its a good idea to take the active aproach and expect nothing back... and you could have called people and said you have nothing to do for new years and they might have inited you along or you could have thought of something to do and tried inviting them but you did neither I'm guessing Link to post Share on other sites
Author LonelyGuy85 Posted January 1, 2010 Author Share Posted January 1, 2010 Yes, Green, you guessed right. My problem is that I feel like I am intruding on other peoples lives, like they all have full lives with other, better friends, even though they had already invited me to things. Sometimes i often ask what they are up to only to be told they are just going to chill. Whenever they say they are going to chill i just think it's their way of saving that they want a quiet night in, so i often avoid asking them then. I definitely like the idea of thinking of it more as me going to do something and inviting them along, i just need to step up my confidence. I am trying to become more implusive as well, i am going to start doing it also. Link to post Share on other sites
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