thatguy100 Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 I have looking around on this website, and well it gave me a few idea's for how to deal with my situation. I had dated a girl for a year and a quarter, she broke up with me 2 months ago, tired being friends but we constantly talked about the past and the relationship, it has only been just recently where I have stopped talking to her about the relationship to her. Because I realized that I was doing no good (Its been 2 weeks since we talked about it). I have decided to go with NC, because I need to get my thoughts straight, I am currently on day 5, and wow it has been tough going this far without talking to her. But I have to say I have been having fun and enjoying myself, but I find myself thinking about her. I have started to do different things, stuff which I usually would not do just trying different things. But again she still is on my mind, I am fine if she goes out and date another guy like I won't stay home and cry, I will just go out and live my life. I just don't know, she was my first serious relationship. Like apart of me wants her back and to try and win her back, but the other part of me just wants to let her go because it was her choice not to be with me anymore, yes certain things did happen between us but ... she wants to be friends and maybe if she see's what she is missing she might come back. I don't know what are some suggestions?
DenverBachelor Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 You seem to be handling this very maturely for this being your first relationship. What I can offer you is my own experiences and let you know how things progress. We lived together for a year and one of the hardest things for me to bare after the breakup was not knowing how her day went or what was going on in her life. Unfortunately in a breakup, you don't get the luxury of slowly moving out of contact. What you do experience is having and knowing how someone is doing and feeling every day of your life and then almost going immediately to not knowing anything about them or their lives. It is as if someone flipped a light switch and you went from walking around a lit room to being completely in the dark. I wish for you it could be easier -- for us both, my friend. But the nature of the beast is that we have to swallow and accept the new found reality and move forward with our lives. It will be one of the hardest experiences in your life, but I do also promise you that you will be stronger from the experience and have more enriching relationships in the future. You don't have to lose sight of what you had, but you must let go and move on with your life. Try and incorporate the good times you guys had together and learn from the weak spots. It's a tough road, but you can walk it.
1life8love1trust Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 thatguy90, whats up? Hey were we not going to get in contact with each other? So going NC huh? We should team up and get through this together. I don't know your exact story, but all I know is things need to happen. The whole one window closes another one open saying... Hit me up on my yahoo email account. We can talk. I am still thinking about her, too. I am a musician, I play the guitar, but I am about to learn Drums. What are you doing to stay busy?
Author thatguy100 Posted December 31, 2009 Author Posted December 31, 2009 Thank you, it is nice to hear that, but I have to admit I was not handling things very maturely for that month and a bit that we remained in contact with each other. I don't know what hit me but I realized that the best thing I can do, is just cut myself out of her life, I know she wants to be friends with me because I am important to her, she trusts me and that she can't lie to me right now. She also said about the future if we ever got married(but if she finds a guy that she is happy with she won't mourn to much), which I know is true she finds a guy she is happy with she will stay with him because she is happy. She called me the perfect guy for her, and she would be happy with me, the way I was earlier in the relationship, I want to be that guy, but I need to get this stuff out of my head and to be the person I was before all of this happened, and to be a stronger person at that. thatguy90, whats up? Hey were we not going to get in contact with each other? So going NC huh? We should team up and get through this together. I don't know your exact story, but all I know is things need to happen. The whole one window closes another one open saying... Hit me up on my yahoo email account. We can talk. I am still thinking about her, too. I am a musician, I play the guitar, but I am about to learn Drums. What are you doing to stay busy? what is your yahoo email account?
Author thatguy100 Posted December 31, 2009 Author Posted December 31, 2009 the way I am keeping busy is by increasing my hours at work, going to the gym, taking up a few of my old hobbies. Also I am planning to learn a new instrument and different things.
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