MyNameIsJonas Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 I've been back and forth as to whether or not I should post this because I've all but decided what to do, but I suppose some outside advice couldn't hurt. I met this one women over match and we've been out twice. Good chemistry and we communicated every 2-3 days, most of which was initiated by her. She flew home a couple weeks ago which is literally across the country and contacted (text) me while in layover. Everything in that exchange led me to believe that things were ok and interest was high. Shortly after she left, my area had a fairly significant snowstorm. I went out and took several dozen shots as I am big into photography and sent her a couple via e-mail. I also sent her a text telling her to check her e-mail. She said she was out shopping but would look at it when she got home. That evening I was at a christmas party and during this party she sent me 5 text messages in a 2 hour period. I did not respond to any of the messages because I have a rule against communicating with "potentials" when I have been drinking. Anyway, judging by the content of the texts, I figure she was drinking as well so I didn't read too much into it (pun?) and went on with my life. She sent me an e-mail the next evening thanking me for the photos. I texted her the next morning telling her I got the e-mail and that i was glad she liked the shots. We each exchanged one more text and left it at that. I haven't spoken to her, text or call since, short of a standard "merry christmas" text I sent on christmas, which she responded to a few hours after I sent it. The reasoning is that she hasn't been home since august so I figure she is busy with family, friends, and all of that. Plus I've been busy with local friends and family. She flies back to my area in mid january. My question is this: When she flies back, should I contact her or wait for her to contact me? Normally I would just call when she got back, but the length of time away combined with the sudden drop-off in communication initiated by her has me wondering if I should just write off and move on. My female friends are telling me not to worry since less is more in these situations, and my male friends are idiots so I don't listen to them anyway. Thanks in advance.
OnlyJake Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 Why do you think she has to do most of the initiating? It sounds like she probably is interpreting your lack of initiation as lack of interest in her.
Author MyNameIsJonas Posted December 31, 2009 Author Posted December 31, 2009 Why do you think she has to do most of the initiating? It sounds like she probably is interpreting your lack of initiation as lack of interest in her. I never said that I thought she had to do most of the initiating. Her behavior was a bit unexpected. For example, the first time we went out, I had plans to call her in a day or two because I knew she had finals and probably didn't want to be bothered. Plus I was working 12-14 hour days at the time and so my personal time was a bit limited. However, she ended up sending me a text that next afternoon stating how much of a good time she had the previous night. Same story on the second outing, as she was scheduled to fly home the next day and I was going to call her later in the week once she was home and settled. Once again, she ended up texting me the next day while she was in layover saying that she had a good time and so forth. The drastic change in behavior just has me wondering if this is worth my time once she does get back in town. Not to sound like a jerk but I do have other options so it's not like I would go all emo if this didn't work out for whatever reason. I just enjoyed my time with her so it would be nice if this did work out once she got back. Also, I suppose my "lack of initiation" recently is just due to the simple fact that she is so far away. I normally don't call women "just to talk;" when I call a woman, it's to schedule a date where I can see her in person, then we talk.
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