thats what i said Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 I've met a few people online and most will suggest a date within the first few emails. However, I was out of town for a week and let them know and they just said okay and we'd get together when I got back. However, I'm still in touch via email with these same guys and they know I'm back in town but they haven't mentioned meeting up... I've had it happen where I'll meet someone online and we'll just be emailing back and forth (or IMing) for weeks and the emails go nowhere and if they do suggest meeting up, it's very vague and they don't actually ask which just drives me crazy. I prefer to meet these guys after getting to know them a little bit to see if it's something that could go anywhere or if I'm just wasting my time. Usually a week or so of emailing (actually more like just several back and forth emails) is enough for me to know if I want to go out with a guy. So is it okay to just ask him myself if he wants to meet up? I know some guys have issues with that and don't like to be asked but would rather be the ones doing the asking. I just hate dropping a million hints and not getting anywhere. Or is it possible I'm just getting a little carried away and should just be more patient?
CarrieT Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 Heck, yea! I ask guys out all the time. No biggie...
sagetalk Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 If I were talking to you on an online dating site, thought you were cute, and you asked me out. I'd be pretty happy about it .
meerkat stew Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 Nothing wrong with getting the ball rolling by suggesting the first date. The serious men met online, though, are going to get your phone number quickly, call up and ask for a date soon, because they are interested in meeting people in person. A guy who waits around and waits around to ask you out is a mild red flag IMO. There are lots of married and otherwise involved people online flirting around to alleviate the boredom they have in their existing relationship with no intention of ever meeting. They are of course just wasting your time.
Vintage79 Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 I've been asked by women online several times, some times in the very first message (generally I like it, as typing lots of e-mails, without much info about who they are is tough, and it's hard to keep things interesting). If you do it, though just don't do what the last one did with me. She mentioned how interesting her work was, and how it was related to mine, then mentioned how she read a book that I did, and would love another person's interpretation. In the end, she essentially asked me out to essentially talk about work and do a book review - I obviously turned that down, but I'd say earlier is better, and I don't count a first meeting from an online source as a date - it's generally a quick coffee chat to see if there's anything - it may go longer, but generally on the shorter side. Good luck!
Recommended Posts