InspiredbyYou Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 DY-NO-MITE!!! LOVE IT! What should I have changed you think? I mean it's a stable life with a great person...but outside of that love it's pretty mundane... I dunnow, but the B is standard, most marriages end in divorce these days anyway. But A was a little over the top. My initial reaction was that the love of my life would not be someone who has 0 ambition and who is working @ MickyDees with no goals to get out. So you kind of lost me right there. That would never be "the love of my life".... The movie Sideways comes to mind when the character who is a writer is in wine country and meets his "love interest" who happens to be a waitress, his friend talks him into going out with her because she shares his affinity in wine and is also really good looking. But the writer still has reservations because afterall she is "just" a waitress. They all finally go out and in talking to her one on one he finds out that she is getting her masters in horticulture, his interest level shoots up by a million that night and it ends with them having a very passionate discussion about wine where she leaves him breathless and fumbling like a fool. You'd be surprised how much these little factors can affect the way we process attraction.
threebyfate Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 Neither, there's no reason why you can't have both, as long as you both bring it to the table.
shadowplay Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 Just popping in to say you're hot (personality + looks).
Author DustySaltus Posted December 30, 2009 Author Posted December 30, 2009 LOVE IT! I dunnow, but the B is standard, most marriages end in divorce these days anyway. But A was a little over the top. My initial reaction was that the love of my life would not be someone who has 0 ambition and who is working @ MickyDees with no goals to get out. So you kind of lost me right there. That would never be "the love of my life".... The movie Sideways comes to mind when the character who is a writer is in wine country and meets his "love interest" who happens to be a waitress, his friend talks him into going out with her because she shares his affinity in wine and is also really good looking. But the writer still has reservations because afterall she is "just" a waitress. They all finally go out and in talking to her one on one he finds out that she is getting her masters in horticulture, his interest level shoots up by a million that night and it ends with them having a very passionate discussion about wine where she leaves him breathless and fumbling like a fool. You'd be surprised how much these little factors can affect the way we process attraction. Sideways is a great movie. One of my favorites. I actually drove a cab when I had just got out of college and started working at my bank because I was trying to earn extra money for law school. I started off making coffee for my boss and now am VP. But when I was driving a cab, people (girls mostly ) would treat me like I didn't exist. Then one day this girl was in my cab and I asked her if she would mind if I just stop by my car real quick to get something on the way to her destination. She said ok and then she saw my car (which was an infiniti) at the time and started acting totalling different when I explained my situation to her. She was cute, but I never asked her for her # .
Bejita463 Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 It's either sacrificing your own ambitions for love or potentially sacrificing love for your own ambitions.... I understood your intent, but the actual scenario lists person A as being someone who has no drive to better themselves. Rather than saying they'll never WANT to move beyond the assistant manager job, it probably would have been a better choice of words to say they simply wouldn't. Nit picking details, I know. I blame my think outside the boxery. Just popping in to say you're hot (personality + looks). Why thank you, I truly appreciate that.
InspiredbyYou Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 (edited) My fave lines: writer: "Aspargus, and a nutty Edam cheese" ditsy actor: "Strawberries yeah definitely strawberries...but not the cheese.." when they do their first tasting of white and "NO if anyone orders Merlot I am leaving, I am NOT drinking Merlot! Respect to cab drivers Dusty!! I've taken a few cabs where I started talking to the drivers and more often than not these are young ambitious guys who are putting themselves through school and some of the older ones are making a killing just from driving a cab alone. My observation is that I have never had a flat conversation with a cab driver, these men are often well rounded and insightful and well educated. It is also a dangerous job that is very hard on the physique. I would date a cab driver but I would be worried of all the drunken women they would be exposed to pretty much on a daily basis. I've heard a lot of stories of what goes on in cabs...and if the guy's cute forget it! Edited December 30, 2009 by InspiredbyYou
melodymatters Posted December 30, 2009 Posted December 30, 2009 I guess I'm confused as to why MY life would be boring because my partners JOB is boring ? I have dated men from all walks of life, and it never impacted my artsy or business endeavours. I can still travel, have kooky friends, throw ethnic food and wine dinner parties etc. So : A !
MyNameIsJonas Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 Maybe I'm more of a risk taker, but I would take B. The reasoning is that a 50% shot of the relationship working out is worth the ambition associated with the employment described in situation B. If we decide to have kids, that much income would do wonders for their future in terms of higher level education. While the choice of guaranteed personal fulfillment over financial security may seem like an obvious choice, I feel that the limited income and potential advancement seems like a destined conflict point for the life of the relationship. Bottom line is that if I have children with my future wife, I want my kids to be set financially to go to college anywhere in the united states, just as my parents did for me. I'd be willing to risk a 50% failure just to have that security.
BUENG1 Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 A) You meet the love of your life. I mean he/she is all you ever dreamed of. The only problem is that he/she is an assistant manager at McDonald's and will never aspire to be anything more than that. They will love you unconditionally, be a great partner and never leave you or cheat on you under any circumstances. You would be working at a job that pays $50,000 a year for the rest of your life. Straight 9-5 job, Monday through Friday but again, you have the perfect relationship OR....... B) You and your partner both make $250,000 a year but there is a 50/50 chance that things will not work out. What do you choose? A because 50k plus her 30 or is plenty to live a comfortable life. I don't plan on kids though. If kids are in the picture like the poster above me mentioned it will be harder.
and.then.some Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 Does it have to be McDonald's? So everyone knows that my 45 year old husband is still working at a fast food joint? LOL If an angel of the Lord came down to me and gave me a choice between the two, I'd still want to ask more about guy A. I would want to know his temperament and why he would never aspire to anything more. Is he prone to depression, substance abuse, or fits of jealousy? Or, is he one who wholeheartedly rejects commercialism, mass consumerism, and capitalism? (In which case he probably wouldn't work at Mickey D's.) If I could get a guarantee that guy A was happy, healthy, stable, and would stay that way, I would choose him over guy B. However, if those things wouldn't be in the contract, I would take guy A, being sure to carefully invest my portion of his money. :-p
carhill Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 I have it on good authority that A is also helping out at the local Ronald McDonald house, volunteering at an animal shelter one day a week and assists in the care of Grandma in her old age. Being necessarily frugal, A has saved up enough money to buy a house, a foreclosure, taking advantage of the first time home-buyer credit and the current real estate market, and also has a paid-for 10 year old vehicle, a small truck, which A uses to transport supplies to work on the house, as well as 'finds' which A donates to those less fortunate. A has a pretty busy and productive life, little of which is in evidence by 'working at McDonald's'. Some people go about the business of life quietly.
blueberries Posted December 31, 2009 Posted December 31, 2009 i know i'll sound like a snobbish bitch when i say this, but i don't think i can date (let alone fall in love with) someone who works at mcD's, if i'm a well educated, successful woman. so i guess i'll pick B.
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