trueblue72ny Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 I have been hanging out here & there with this girl for about 3 or 4 months. She says she is interested, but yet does not act on it. so I keep telling her, its ok if you just want to be friends, but she swears I got it wrong and has been wanting to have some kind of talk with me. this has been going on for about 2 months. I don’t get what this talk is supposed to be about. if you are interested, you just see each other. Right? Or you show it thru your actions. we see each other maybe once a week for a couple hours to grab a bite to eat. That’s it. We have never even kissed! So I keep wondering what the heck is going on, this is getting annoying. but its never a good time for her to talk. and that’s fine, I take that as my answer. My motto, You either want to, or you don’t. & actions speak louder than words. So I keep telling her, its ok, we can just be friends. Now I have been backing off over the last few weeks. Letting her initiate contact etc. then she tells me it bothers her and how are we supposed to have a relationship like that. her birthday was a couple weeks ago – I didn’t get to see her. she made excuses. I didn’t get to see her for xmass. More excuses. in fact this past weekend was the first time I have seen her in 3 weeks! And it was an hour and a half dinner at Fridays, then we went our separate ways. xmass eve she drives up to my house, drops off cookies on my doorstep and leaves! She didn’t even knock on my door and I was home! does anyone else think that is weird? Finally, last night I have had enough. I said you make excuses. in response she tells me I am being childish. I say I am not. There is nothing wrong with knowing where you stand with someone. This morning I dropped the bomb. I was reading one of tara maidens posts and it made perfect sense in my situation, so I used what tara said (thanks Tara!) and told my friend this morning: Listen, I don’t want this to get messed up, so I will say this. You have a lot on your plate, I don’t think you even know what is up. I will be there for support, but for now I can only be there just as a friend until you feel ready to commit to a relationship, then maybe we can both review the situation if/when we cross that bridge. Not trying to be mean, hope you are having a good day. Ttyl. Her response: if and when you can have these conversations verbally, I will be here to listen. Take care. My response: I have been asking you to talk forever so when you want to let me know. Her response is just totally bizarre. We will see what happens. I mean in order to have a relationship with someone you have to be able to spend time with each other right? You hang out and get to know each other more than just a couple hours on a weekend, if that. And after 3 months of this, I think its time to make a decision. I guess i am just venting because it annoys me to no end that I spent the last 4 months talking, 3months of seeing, someone who keeps telling me one thing but acts like another. I mean seriously. That is what annoys me the most! Why do that to someone! I offered just friends a bunch of times. so why lead me on! although I am a bit down about the whole thing, I do feel proud for sticking up for myself. not allowing myself to become a doormat this time. I mean how can you feel good about yourself telling someone one thing, but then doing another?? Maybe she is just trying to freeze me out, hoping I would get sick of it, and leave, then the blame is on me for leaving. When in fact her behavior is the cause for the effect.
sean1970 Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 Games bro... games... Doormats are for wiping your feet on. You have better uses for you time.
nobmagnet Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 What a blummin mind f*ck!!!!! tell her to sling her hook! if she is this bad at the beginning what the heck would she be like when you falll for her?? Dump and run. You dont need a freind like this let alone a lover. Dodged a bullet! well donexxx
Author trueblue72ny Posted December 29, 2009 Author Posted December 29, 2009 Thanks guys. I am really disturbed by her response to me, wtf! That is one of my concerns as well nobmagnet… how good is it going to get? If its like this now… will everything magically change after some alleged talk??? Can someone be a cold fish one day? Than affectionate, and a dynamo in the sack the next? Doubtful.
nobmagnet Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 yep head blow. She doesnt sound too well in the head but it is not your job to fix it. NO Florence Nightingale!!!! PLEASE!!! lots of lovely babes out there! You can take my short shirt out anytime!! ( Bridget Jones Diarys) hahah xx
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