minutebyminute Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 Okay, as stupid as it sounds, i want to send something to my ex OM, via mail addressed to him, who is living with his new love. He moved in with this person as a place to live, and guess what, they became lovers!! I need final closure. He shouldn't get away with goodbye see ya later that's it and no contact should he?? I still have this fantasy we will be together someday. .fanasy broken, I want to send him a book that mirrors our relationship together. I have it planned so that the new girlfriend will not suspect (horrible, I know) but need him to know what he meant to me and it will be my end or closure. I hurt okay, he ****ed me over and told me about it. Seven months later, I want him to know what he meant to me, which was everything, my everything. I want to send him this book with a note, Am I WRONG or RIGHT for doing this
awkward Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 Please consider NOT sending him anything. Right now you are still hurting. Later when he becomes an afterthought, I think you would be happier knowing that you didn't send it. IMO it is best to stay with the no contact. I'm sorry that you are hurting. It will get easier.
Fallen Angel Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 I agree. Don't send it. He already knows what he meant to you, he just didn't care enough to do right by you. You deserve better than to give this man even one more minute of your time, or thoughts. Instead of spending your money buying him that book, take yourself out to a movie, or buy yourself a special treat (some great bubble bath, a scented candle)
crystal_lostheart Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 Don't bother wasting anymore energy on this assh**le. Do you think he is thinking about you? Do you think he is hurting like you. Forget him. Move on, be happy- he is NOT worth it
temple Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 Don't send it. A guy like this wouldn't look at the book and be 'reminded' of how great your relationship was. He'd probably just be delighted that he has all these women pining over him. Don't give him the satisfaction of letting him know you still want him back.
Hazyhead Posted December 29, 2009 Posted December 29, 2009 Completely agree with all the other posters. PLEASE DO NOT SEND!!! I know how you feel, you want him to feel the same hurt you feel, you want him to pick up the book and feel wistful. Even if he did what good does that actually do you? You will feel far worse not knowing his reaction and not hearing back than you would if you just keep trying to move past it. He is with somebody else now, I'm so sorry you're still hurting MbM but you have to let him go for your own sake.
Author minutebyminute Posted December 29, 2009 Author Posted December 29, 2009 Thank you, I won't send him anything. I cannot believe I still feel this way after 7 months. Everyday thinking of this guy. Anyway, no contact, I'll just keep posting here.
silverplanets Posted January 5, 2010 Posted January 5, 2010 I agree - don't send - and am pleased for you that you didn't. This is not about him any more - your responsibility to him ended 7 months ago. Whilst sending it would have helped you in one way it would also have also drawn you back into it in another way and therefore ultimately you would have needed to re-do some of what you've achived in those dark months. On the positive side, you NOT sending it is a sign that in some small way you are not as caught up in it as you were ... and that progress (however small) should be something you are proud of. If you can take this small step to protect and put yourself first then you can keep going and take another. This isn't about him any more - it's only about you :-) Chris
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