pandagirl Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 This is a situation that I've heard of a lot lately from several friends. Two people dating anywhere from 6-12 months on a steady basis, but they're not boyfriend/girlfriend. They hang out often, have sex, even go on trips together, but when I ask them what they are, they say: "It's not serious. I don't know what we are." They're also open to dating other people, but not finding anyone better. It's like these people fulfill about 75% of their needs, and they're content with that. This kind of dating would just drive me INSANE. You're either out or in with me and I would hate the ambiguity. I guess...it seems like, they're not just that into them, but into them enough to keep it going? Has anyone been in one of the relationship and explain why it worked for you?
Pizzaman81 Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 This is a situation that I've heard of a lot lately from several friends. Two people dating anywhere from 6-12 months on a steady basis, but they're not boyfriend/girlfriend. They hang out often, have sex, even go on trips together, but when I ask them what they are, they say: "It's not serious. I don't know what we are." They're also open to dating other people, but not finding anyone better. It's like these people fulfill about 75% of their needs, and they're content with that. This kind of dating would just drive me INSANE. You're either out or in with me and I would hate the ambiguity. I guess...it seems like, they're not just that into them, but into them enough to keep it going? Has anyone been in one of the relationship and explain why it worked for you? I don't understand this. The longest i've dated someone before I decided to become exclusive was about 3 months. To me, I think if you start having sex then it should be exclusive no? maybe i'm just old fashioned.
Author pandagirl Posted December 28, 2009 Author Posted December 28, 2009 I don't understand this. The longest i've dated someone before I decided to become exclusive was about 3 months. To me, I think if you start having sex then it should be exclusive no? maybe i'm just old fashioned. Dude, I don't get it either -- that's why I ask. haha. My friend told me last night she's been seeing a guy for a year, but they're not boyfriend/girlfriend. They see each other once a week and have a good time. She said they just had a "talk" about it, but nothing was settled. She doesn't seem upset by the situation though. I have a hunch that people in these situations may be in it for good sex.
Pizzaman81 Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Dude, I don't get it either -- that's why I ask. haha. My friend told me last night she's been seeing a guy for a year, but they're not boyfriend/girlfriend. They see each other once a week and have a good time. She said they just had a "talk" about it, but nothing was settled. She doesn't seem upset by the situation though. I have a hunch that people in these situations may be in it for good sex. Actually I take that back with having sex meaning exclusive. With my ex, we were having sex for about 2 months before calling us exclusive... just to see how compatible we were you know. Here's the dire truth about dating, relationships in general... people can leave for any reason. There's no binding contract or whatever. You can be dating, exclusive relationship or whatever, one of them can just leave. I think it's the emotional attachment that goes with each of these stages that people are afraid of tying themselves to if they don't feel that way. I DONT KNOW ANYMORE!
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