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Did I move too fast?


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Posted (edited)

This guy I have been dating for about 7 months said he had an early Christmas present for me, so he came over to my place. We madeout....for quite some time in my room....but within that period I had taken my shirt off….there was groping/squeezing…neck/chest…back massage(norm for makeouts?)

**Also...before this we have only kissed 3 times w/in the 7months bc one of us is always nervous/shy or something**

 

So I am wondering if I moved too fast?? Is this how it's supposed to happen? I have never dated or anything and I’m still a virgin...he is the first guy I have ever kissed(I am 23 and he is 22).

We both had a great time...but I keep thinking that maybe I was supposed to have kept my shirt on?...So when the next few times we makeout again…then it comes off? Is there a certain order/timeframe for all this?

 

I thought it was okay to do because we have been seeing each other for so long and then like bam we were together kissing...when we both have been dying to do so for so long.

 

 

If someone could pleeeeeease give input?

 

The next time this happens should I just undo everything I did before and just kiss normally?

Edited by SinglePeaInThePoD
Posted

no you absolutely did not move too fast. you two are moving at a 4th graders pace, but hey whatever works for you. sounds to me like this guy is just verrrrrry shy, but trust me, if hes been dating you for 7 months, hes ready to get to the goods.

Posted

Do what feels right to you. There is no exact formula when it comes to dating and that's the beauty of it. With that said, if you've been dating 7 months, I see no problem with what you did unless you were uncomfortable with it and it felt forced.

Posted

No you didn't move too fast. Infact, he's probably secretly thanking you in his head. ;)

Posted

Do what feels comfortable. To me, "too fast" is is having sex before being "steady" for a week or two.

 

There is no way it's "supposed" to happen. It just does.

Posted

"Too fast" is relative.

 

I think the above statement of sex after a steady week or so is "too fast."

 

I want a steady month or so.

 

To most, that is LONG time.

 

Either way, sex after a month is still way off your 7 month shirt off time.

 

To be honest though, quit looking for validation from people on a forum. Asking other people's opinion about when it is "time" is pointless. It wont change how you actually feel about it.

 

To me, sounds like it really was "too early" for you, or it was awkward.

 

Figure all that out before proceeding to further things with him.

 

Do things when you are comfortable, not when you think it is "time."

Posted

You two sound adorable together.

 

Anyhow, yah, agree with everyone else, no time frame, just do what you feel is right when it feels right.

Posted

As stated before, "too fast" is relative depending on the individuals involved. ;)IMO - no, that is not "too fast." You asked if next time, your shirt has to come off again. He'll probably expect it - but take his off, too. :D It's amazing how great skin on skin feels.

Posted

whatever you are comfortable with is the most important. If you "feel" you went a little to far then you can always modify your next session.

Posted

First, "too fast" is relative. In my opinion, yes I think that was too fast of a jump (three kisses to topless make out), but most here will say it is too slow.

 

What are your goals in life regarding sex? Do you just want to have fun with guys, or do you want sexual encounters to be the sealing of a very serious relationship? Those are two very different things.

 

If you are still a virgin, I would go slow with this guy. At this point he's probably on cloud nine, but you don't want him to start seeing you only as a sexual object. If he's dated you this long with only 3 kisses, then I would say there's not too much to worry about that though.

 

Use your head and be careful. Sex is a very big deal, especially if you are a virgin (which is awesome btw :)). If you're making out and taking your cloths off, then sex is right around the corner. My best advice is to go slow. The next time you make out, don't take your shirt off and see how he reacts. If he's cool with it, then I think you found yourself a pretty awesome guy :cool:.

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