aerogurl87 Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Ok about a month ago I first told my boyfriend I loved him in the middle of sex which I'm sure he didn't put too much thought into, plus it was a pretty muffled "I love you" so yeah, not sure if he even heard it. Fast forward to a week ago and I tell him again when he drops me off at my house that night. Does he say it back? No, he just looks at me with this giant smile and leans in to kiss me again with more passion than anytime before. Then when he gets home that night he texts me to tell me he had a great time and puts a smiley face at the end of his text and we text back and forth before I fall asleep. Now I know my boyfriend isn't so great with telling me how he feels since he says he rather let his actions speak for him, than words. But I'm starting to get very curious to how he feels exactly. I know he cares for me, so I'm not doubting that whatsoever. But I'm starting to wonder if maybe I should've let him tell me he loved me first. I know for one that my telling him first didn't scare him away and actually it seems to have done the opposite, which is awesome So my real question is this then. Guys, would you be put off if your girlfriend told you she loved you first? I mean, would you rather be the one to tell her first and prefer to make her wait to say it to you?
You'reasian Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Ok about a month ago I first told my boyfriend I loved him in the middle of sex which I'm sure he didn't put too much thought into, plus it was a pretty muffled "I love you" so yeah, not sure if he even heard it. Fast forward to a week ago and I tell him again when he drops me off at my house that night. Does he say it back? No, he just looks at me with this giant smile and leans in to kiss me again with more passion than anytime before. Then when he gets home that night he texts me to tell me he had a great time and puts a smiley face at the end of his text and we text back and forth before I fall asleep. Now I know my boyfriend isn't so great with telling me how he feels since he says he rather let his actions speak for him, than words. But I'm starting to get very curious to how he feels exactly. I know he cares for me, so I'm not doubting that whatsoever. But I'm starting to wonder if maybe I should've let him tell me he loved me first. I know for one that my telling him first didn't scare him away and actually it seems to have done the opposite, which is awesome So my real question is this then. Guys, would you be put off if your girlfriend told you she loved you first? I mean, would you rather be the one to tell her first and prefer to make her wait to say it to you? My gf told me I love you first. I was ok with this.
Author aerogurl87 Posted December 28, 2009 Author Posted December 28, 2009 My gf told me I love you first. I was ok with this. Hmm well he seems ok with it too, but I just wonder if he would've preferred to tell me himself first.
You'reasian Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Hmm well he seems ok with it too, but I just wonder if he would've preferred to tell me himself first. What's done is done. Enjoy your love
carolinawanderer Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 When I was younger, my father gave me a piece of advice that I took to heart ever since: "Son, never tell a woman you love her unless you REALLY mean it." He probably isn't sure about you YET and does not want to hurt you by telling you before he knows to soon. Of course, that's just a guess. He's probably very happy you told him this, because of his actions after. He probably feels strongly for you but wants to be sure he actually loves you. It's what I'd do. And no, I would not be put off if a girl did that to me first, and you shouldn't think he is. Based on what you've told me, he'll probably say it to you in due time.
Awesome Username Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 I wouldn't worry too much about him not saying it yet. I've been in the situation where I feel love for the other person but don't say "I love you," because it just always seems so awkward when it's said! "I love you." *symphony music*
sagetalk Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 I would never tell a girl I loved her unless I was 100% certain and far into the relationship. Those are some big words .
Author aerogurl87 Posted December 28, 2009 Author Posted December 28, 2009 Thanks everyone for your responses. Like I said I know he cares about me, which he tells me alot. But I guess he's just waiting to see if he's 100% sure which is fine with me. I wouldn't worry too much about him not saying it yet. I've been in the situation where I feel love for the other person but don't say "I love you," because it just always seems so awkward when it's said! "I love you." *symphony music* Haha that's kind of how I felt when I told him the second time. I felt this weird awkwardness that had my stomach in knots, but his smile kind of made that fade away. I guess I'll just wait it out and see what happens.
thegreatmoose Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Guys, would you be put off if your girlfriend told you she loved you first? I mean, would you rather be the one to tell her first and prefer to make her wait to say it to you? I have no idea why this would matter. Some get so carried away with this one way or the other.
Awesome Username Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Thanks everyone for your responses. Like I said I know he cares about me, which he tells me alot. But I guess he's just waiting to see if he's 100% sure which is fine with me. Haha that's kind of how I felt when I told him the second time. I felt this weird awkwardness that had my stomach in knots, but his smile kind of made that fade away. I guess I'll just wait it out and see what happens. Yeah, a my ex did that and I smiled real big and kissed him. That was supposed to be my, "I love you too," but later he brought up how I didn't say it back and got all " :c " about it. I said, "Of course I do - but saying I love you too is just cheesy!" To each method their own, eh?
You'reasian Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Yeah, a my ex did that and I smiled real big and kissed him. That was supposed to be my, "I love you too," but later he brought up how I didn't say it back and got all " :c " about it. I said, "Of course I do - but saying I love you too is just cheesy!" To each method their own, eh? Must be a California girl thing...jk
Awesome Username Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Must be a California girl thing...jk Yeah, Hella.
JL911 Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Ya know this works both ways...sometimes each of the opposite sex can have issues putting those words out there.... I feel very strongly for my current gf, but am still very reluctant to throw those words out there...I know that once they are said there truly is no going back.
MyNameIsJonas Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 So my real question is this then. Guys, would you be put off if your girlfriend told you she loved you first? I mean, would you rather be the one to tell her first and prefer to make her wait to say it to you? Assuming the relationship has gone on for a bit of time and we are both comfortable with each other, then no, I would not have a problem if she said it first. I would rather a woman tell me how she felt then try to hold it back for fear of rejection or whatever. That being said, that phrase is very powerful regardless of who states it first. I haven't experienced this personally, but I have friends who have been in relationships where this has been stated by one or the other much too early in the relationship and the relationship crashed and burned as a result.
Author aerogurl87 Posted December 28, 2009 Author Posted December 28, 2009 Assuming the relationship has gone on for a bit of time and we are both comfortable with each other, then no, I would not have a problem if she said it first. I would rather a woman tell me how she felt then try to hold it back for fear of rejection or whatever. That being said, that phrase is very powerful regardless of who states it first. I haven't experienced this personally, but I have friends who have been in relationships where this has been stated by one or the other much too early in the relationship and the relationship crashed and burned as a result. Yeah I didn't want to say it to early but it's done now. We've been dating for 3 months now so I didn't think that was too early, plus we've known each other for almost a year now. I don't think it's really hindered our relationship at all since it's seemed to bring us closer together.
MyNameIsJonas Posted December 28, 2009 Posted December 28, 2009 Yeah I didn't want to say it to early but it's done now. We've been dating for 3 months now so I didn't think that was too early, plus we've known each other for almost a year now. I don't think it's really hindered our relationship at all since it's seemed to bring us closer together. Yeah it sounds like you are in a good place. Glad to hear it worked out in your favor! When I said "too early" I mean weeks, not months. I actually had a friend tell a girl that he loved her no more than 4 weeks into a relationship, where they did not know each other very long beforehand. Relationship ended 2 weeks later when he caught her making out with some db at a local bar.
Author aerogurl87 Posted December 28, 2009 Author Posted December 28, 2009 Yeah it sounds like you are in a good place. Glad to hear it worked out in your favor! When I said "too early" I mean weeks, not months. I actually had a friend tell a girl that he loved her no more than 4 weeks into a relationship, where they did not know each other very long beforehand. Relationship ended 2 weeks later when he caught her making out with some db at a local bar. Thanks, yeah my ex told me he loved me after we'd been "dating" for a week. Scared the crap out of me since I had already told him I wasn't too sure about how our LDR would work out.
Recommended Posts