Jump to content

Unbelievable Personal Ad (Long...But A Must-Read)


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

The following is a personal ad posted on CraigslistMontreal...that I recently came across(from a 31 woman)...Yes,it might be

fake but if not...wow!! Men,Would you

respond to such an ad ? Women,would

you ? If the exact same ad happened to be posted by a man ? I mean is this an example what's really out there ? For Men & Women ?

 

The Ad:

 

What I am looking for....the ultimate question.....ok, here goes.....be forewarned, this might be offensive to some.....

 

I am looking for a man who is open to the possibilities of meeting the woman of his dreams. I realize that the odds are pretty slim here on craigs list, but I am of the mind that it is better to try and fail then never to try at all!

 

CONTACT ME IF.....

 

-You have a good sense of humor

-You are intelligent

-You are educated

-You are charismatic

-You are well traveled

-You are enthusiastic

-You are social and active

-You are confident

-You believe in all of the many possibilities in life, not solely romantic, but in career, family, friends, living abroad because of a super fabulous opportunity

-You are positive. Everyone has down days, that is unavoidable, but if you are able to find the bright side eventually that is very important

-You are not judgmental. I have found that real, true self-confidence leads people to be non-judgmental and that superficial self-centered individuals tend to be the most judgmental....

-You are handsome to me (NO PHOTO NO RESPONSE)

-You are taller than 5"11.

-You are fit enough. I am not looking for a hard-core gym guy, but I also don't want a skinny fat guy (meaning a guy that looks thin under his clothing, but due to the lack of exercise throughout his life, has moobs underneath his shirt. A little bit of fat over that muscle is fine, but no muscle at all is not so fine

-You know who you are. I would rather not meet a 40 year old man who is still figuring out who he is.

-You show affection more than you verbalize it. I love receiving compliments, who doesn't, but without action they are just empty words.

 

DO NOT CONTACT ME IF.....

 

-You cannot see the humor in this posting

-You are a drug user (marijuana included)

-You are lazy

-You are an angry person

-You have major mental problems, such as, depression, manic depression, schizophrenia, social phobias, etc.....Everyone has some mental issues, I want to avoid the extreme ones.

-You are a workaholic

-You are looking for a 'casual encounter'. I like sex, but want to have it with someone who wants to wake up with me in the morning and have breakfast and coffee and chat and snuggle. Of course he also has to be someone whom I want to do all those things with as well, this is the tricky part!

-You are married or in a relationship

-You are addicted to drugs, alcohol or porn. I like real sex, with a real man, not internet sex, or sex with a porn playing in the background.

-You are under 5"11 in height

-You are obese

-You are bald

-You are over 41 years of age

-You are commitment phobic

-You are arrogant

-You are a nihilist

-You don't know what a nihilist is

 

Alrighty then, if you are not completely terrified or disgusted, here is a little bit about me!

 

I am 5"9 inches tall. I have a wonderful collections of heals and like to wear them when the day or evening calls for them and can be as tall as 6 feet with my heals on.

I have brown eyes and curly, long, dyed red hair (my hair color often changes with the season, although the length stays the same).

I am a painter and enjoy just about everything artistic and beautiful.

I am well traveled.

I am educated.

I love living in a city for a few years then moving to another city to live for another few years, and so on.....Ultimately I would love to meet a man who would be open to the idea of living, traveling, with me around the world.

I moved to MTL about a year and a half ago and have been finding it difficult to meet new people. This is very difficult for me because I love being social, meeting new people! Unfortunately the circumstances of my life at this time are not conducive to meeting new people on a regular basis....a conversation for another time......

I love great restaurants, art, movies, live music, skating in the old port on a Sat. evening and watching the fireworks, traveling, exploring, reading, people watching, getting dressed up to go out, getting dressed down to go out, getting dressed up to stay in, staying dressed down to stay in, cooking, so many things....

I have a great sense of humor and love to laugh. I don't enjoy cruel humor, although I find sarcasm sometimes funny.

I am insecure about my spelling and have a link to dictionary.com on my computer.

I love love love music and always felt that if I wasn't so passionate about my painting that I would have been a musician.

I have many faults (who doesn't) but would like to find my puzzle piece. A man who's faults fit with mine....

 

I'm sure there's is so much more, but there has to be something left to discover, right? right!

 

And so, if you (for the most part) fit this description and would like to chat, grab a coffee, get to know one another, drop me a line.

 

Please send me your photo and I will send you mine.

 

Posted
DO NOT CONTACT ME IF.....

 

-You don't know what a nihilist is

 

I had to google Nihilist :laugh:

 

 

She sounds like a very dating bitter person and will most likely never find a man that will either fit or become all she is looking for..

 

Why would you even think about replying to this ad ?

 

She made it impossible for any man to reply to her ad...

Posted

no I would never reply to someone who takes himself so seriously (if it was a he). it's not a dumb ad but she tried to cover every possibility so she is probably a control freak. likely to be pretty annoying in person I reckon.

 

I like laid back, masculine men so I would find an ad like that very off-putting

Posted

CONTACT ME IF.....

 

-You are handsome to me (NO PHOTO NO RESPONSE)

 

 

Please send me your photo and I will send you mine.

 

 

When I was online dating this part would guarantee me not replying..

 

She doesn't post her own picture but mentions that if you don't reply to her with yours then you are out..

 

Kinda crazy sounding honestly..

 

What is wrong with a guy not replying with no picture to an ad that doesn't have a picture ?

 

I also would never reply to an online ad that didn't put her picture out there..

I always had my posted and would expect any match of mine to do the same.

Posted

I am 5"9 inches tall. I have a wonderful collections of heals and like to wear them when the day or evening calls for them and can be as tall as 6 feet with my heals on.

 

You should respond with "I like women who can spell"! :laugh:

Posted
I had to google Nihilist :laugh:

 

"We are nihilists, Lebowski! We believe in nothing!"

 

and

 

"Say what you will about the tenets of National Socialism, dude, but at least it's ethos"

Posted
You should respond with "I like women who can spell"! :laugh:

 

Haha ! Love it...I caught it too...

Posted
Haha ! Love it...I caught it too...
If she's targeting educated men, the least she can do is to bring education to the table! :p:laugh:;)
Posted
If she's targeting educated men, the least she can do is to bring education to the table! :p:laugh:;)

 

 

Well, you can cut her some slack -- she does state, "I am insecure about my spelling and have a link to dictionary.com on my computer."

She just forgot to use it before she placed her ad!

Posted

Yeah, it's pathetic when a woman starts making her personal ad sound like more like a list of TERRORIST demands than an actual personal ad. :laugh:

Posted

typical laundry list. nothing new

Posted

"-You are addicted to drugs, alcohol or porn. I like real sex, with a real man, not internet sex, or sex with a porn playing in the background. "

 

Well this just says to me "I don't like to experiment." XD

 

 

Just to be nitpicky, she says:

 

CONTACT IF:

-You are taller than 5"11.

DO NOT CONTACT IF:

-You are under 5"11 in height

 

What does the poor sap who is exactly 5'11" do? :lmao:

 

 

DO NOT CONTACT IF:

-You cannot see the humor in this posting

 

Honestly, I really don't see much humor in her ad at all. O.o

 

And "heals"? >.<

Posted
typical laundry list. nothing new

 

Your hitting reply as we speak.. aren't you ?

Posted

Honestly, I really don't see much humor in her ad at all.

 

Yeah.. zero humor

Posted
Well, you can cut her some slack -- she does state, "I am insecure about my spelling and have a link to dictionary.com on my computer."

 

She just forgot to use it before she placed her ad!

 

"Hi, I can't spell or use punctuation and grammar defeats me, but I want an educated man."

 

Sorry, she's getting no sympathy or slack from me. :rolleyes:

Posted
Your hitting reply as we speak.. aren't you ?

 

 

no, and it is "you're"

Posted

At least she's honest and crystal clear about what she wants and doesn't want. :laugh:

Posted
no, and it is "you're"

 

hahahaha..... I've never said my grammar/spelling is great.. so the fact that you expect me to have perfect spelling and grammar on a relationship board is kinda funny..

.

I'm married by the way... :laugh:

Posted

I saw humor in the LS posts over her post.

 

Honestly I would not respond to her post for the following reasons.

 

Whoa! so not my type!

Her list is just unbearable, at least she has standards.

Just the wrong vibe

I'm pretty easy going but her ad made my red flags, caution flags, checkered flags, etc... go off.

Posted
Well, you can cut her some slack -- she does state, "I am insecure about my spelling and have a link to dictionary.com on my computer."

She just forgot to use it before she placed her ad!

'heal' is a legitimate word, so it wouldn't have shown up as an error.

 

I am constantly typing the word 'form' instead of 'from' and have to go back and correct for myself, because the spell-checker doesn't underline it as incorrect.

Posted
'heal' is a legitimate word, so it wouldn't have shown up as an error.

 

I am constantly typing the word 'form' instead of 'from' and have to go back and correct for myself, because the spell-checker doesn't underline it as incorrect.

 

That pesky 'a' key, always getting in the way of my second attempt to hit the 'e' key!

Posted

no, she really doesn't know that heel is spelt 'heel' and not 'heal'.... but as both words are correct, she wouldn't know she's made an error.

Posted
no, she really doesn't know that heel is spelt 'heel' and not 'heal'.... but as both words are correct, she wouldn't know she's made an error.

 

Oh, I know and agree with you. :p Just saying that your "form/from" typo is different than a "heel/heal" typo.

Posted
The following is a personal ad posted on CraigslistMontreal...that I recently came across(from a 31 woman)...Yes,it might be

fake but if not...wow!! Men,Would you

respond to such an ad ? Women,would

you ? If the exact same ad happened to be posted by a man ? I mean is this an example what's really out there ? For Men & Women ?

 

The Ad:

 

What I am looking for....the ultimate question.....ok, here goes.....be forewarned, this might be offensive to some.....

 

I am looking for a man who is open to the possibilities of meeting the woman of his dreams. I realize that the odds are pretty slim here on craigs list, but I am of the mind that it is better to try and fail then never to try at all!

 

CONTACT ME IF.....

 

-You have a good sense of humor

-You are intelligent

-You are educated

-You are charismatic

-You are well traveled

-You are enthusiastic

-You are social and active

-You are confident

-You believe in all of the many possibilities in life, not solely romantic, but in career, family, friends, living abroad because of a super fabulous opportunity

-You are positive. Everyone has down days, that is unavoidable, but if you are able to find the bright side eventually that is very important

-You are not judgmental. I have found that real, true self-confidence leads people to be non-judgmental and that superficial self-centered individuals tend to be the most judgmental....

-You are handsome to me (NO PHOTO NO RESPONSE)

-You are taller than 5"11.

-You are fit enough. I am not looking for a hard-core gym guy, but I also don't want a skinny fat guy (meaning a guy that looks thin under his clothing, but due to the lack of exercise throughout his life, has moobs underneath his shirt. A little bit of fat over that muscle is fine, but no muscle at all is not so fine

-You know who you are. I would rather not meet a 40 year old man who is still figuring out who he is.

-You show affection more than you verbalize it. I love receiving compliments, who doesn't, but without action they are just empty words.

 

DO NOT CONTACT ME IF.....

 

-You cannot see the humor in this posting

-You are a drug user (marijuana included)

-You are lazy

-You are an angry person

-You have major mental problems, such as, depression, manic depression, schizophrenia, social phobias, etc.....Everyone has some mental issues, I want to avoid the extreme ones.

-You are a workaholic

-You are looking for a 'casual encounter'. I like sex, but want to have it with someone who wants to wake up with me in the morning and have breakfast and coffee and chat and snuggle. Of course he also has to be someone whom I want to do all those things with as well, this is the tricky part!

-You are married or in a relationship

-You are addicted to drugs, alcohol or porn. I like real sex, with a real man, not internet sex, or sex with a porn playing in the background.

-You are under 5"11 in height

-You are obese

-You are bald

-You are over 41 years of age

-You are commitment phobic

-You are arrogant

-You are a nihilist

-You don't know what a nihilist is

 

Alrighty then, if you are not completely terrified or disgusted, here is a little bit about me!

 

I am 5"9 inches tall. I have a wonderful collections of heals and like to wear them when the day or evening calls for them and can be as tall as 6 feet with my heals on.

I have brown eyes and curly, long, dyed red hair (my hair color often changes with the season, although the length stays the same).

I am a painter and enjoy just about everything artistic and beautiful.

I am well traveled.

I am educated.

I love living in a city for a few years then moving to another city to live for another few years, and so on.....Ultimately I would love to meet a man who would be open to the idea of living, traveling, with me around the world.

I moved to MTL about a year and a half ago and have been finding it difficult to meet new people. This is very difficult for me because I love being social, meeting new people! Unfortunately the circumstances of my life at this time are not conducive to meeting new people on a regular basis....a conversation for another time......

I love great restaurants, art, movies, live music, skating in the old port on a Sat. evening and watching the fireworks, traveling, exploring, reading, people watching, getting dressed up to go out, getting dressed down to go out, getting dressed up to stay in, staying dressed down to stay in, cooking, so many things....

I have a great sense of humor and love to laugh. I don't enjoy cruel humor, although I find sarcasm sometimes funny.

I am insecure about my spelling and have a link to dictionary.com on my computer.

I love love love music and always felt that if I wasn't so passionate about my painting that I would have been a musician.

I have many faults (who doesn't) but would like to find my puzzle piece. A man who's faults fit with mine....

 

I'm sure there's is so much more, but there has to be something left to discover, right? right!

 

And so, if you (for the most part) fit this description and would like to chat, grab a coffee, get to know one another, drop me a line.

 

Please send me your photo and I will send you mine.

 

 

Wow, she's going to be single forever. Bless her heart....

Posted

she'll never find a man that meets her standards, because the man that does meet her standards would rather date a hotter, younger, less drama ridden woman.

×
×
  • Create New...