kimflute26 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 I'm a member of a couple dating sites and I can always look to see if someone has read a message that I've sent to them. More than once now I've had situations where I'll send someone a message, I can see clearly that they have read it, but they will not decide to respond until the next day or so. Does this mean they're trying to decide if I'm worth a responce or maybe they're planning what they want to say? Just wondering...
Author kimflute26 Posted December 26, 2009 Author Posted December 26, 2009 P.s. I've started making it a rule that I will not continue a conversation with someone that either cannot put together a grammatically correct sentence, or who's responses are too short...
Mary3 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 I'm a member of a couple dating sites and I can always look to see if someone has read a message that I've sent to them. More than once now I've had situations where I'll send someone a message, I can see clearly that they have read it, but they will not decide to respond until the next day or so. Does this mean they're trying to decide if I'm worth a responce or maybe they're planning what they want to say? Just wondering... Thats because they have hundreds of emails from all the winks and short mails they have sent others....so yours is just ONE out of many. They see yours and they are * thinking about * what to respond back to you , if ever at all...
Author kimflute26 Posted December 26, 2009 Author Posted December 26, 2009 Ya... and I cant tell you how many of these guys are just NOT the same people they wrote about in their well crafted profiles! For example: I saw a brilliant profile by this one guy... He seemed perfect by his description. VERY goal oriented, wants to travel the world (has has traveled a lot of it), loves to read fiction and nonfiction books, doesn't play games, treats a lady right, etc etc..... I send him a couple messages (both his responses were short). At one point I asked him what his goals were and he says "My goal is just to stay out of trouble. I'm good at getting into it" and that was after he made such a huge deal of his "MANY goals".... Oy... NEXT
Mary3 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 Thats because 99.9% of the profiles are LIES. Many have NO goals , ( and alot more lacking , take your pick ) I had that. One man wrote very lonnnnnng eloquent letters but refused , absoulutely refused to talk on the phone. This went on for months. Did not want to call or meet. MOST are cut and paste . Getting them to SAY anything after that...forget it...as you found out. You know what the secret is : Just wrote one line sentence , like a greeting sentence. Like "I love your dog in the picture....Any man worth his salt will make an attempt to make a short paragraph back,.( if interested ) DANGER : BE very leery of those really LONG letters in which the spelling is kinda strange, they tell you how much they love you , they live in Nigeria or UK ( no offense to anyone there ) but I am referring to the Nigerian Scammers...Those sickeningly sweet letters are designed to eventually remove money from your wallet. There pics are fake. Please NEVER send money to anyone , ever. ( unless its a family member , someone you know )
stevejohnson1976 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 I wont respond to an email right away because I don't want to seem to eager. Games, I know....But it's pretty much a rule. I had a girl send me an email around 1pm. I read it, want to respond, but won't until tomorrow. If you respond right away, it could like you have no life and are desperate for someone or don't get any other emails. Waiting a day is not a big deal. I wouldn't look into it AT ALL.
Mary3 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 I wont respond to an email right away because I don't want to seem to eager. Games, I know....But it's pretty much a rule. I had a girl send me an email around 1pm. I read it, want to respond, but won't until tomorrow. If you respond right away, it could like you have no life and are desperate for someone or don't get any other emails. Waiting a day is not a big deal. I wouldn't look into it AT ALL. But it can also mean you are interested . I would rather send an email and if he sends one back I would think he was not into playing games,..
stevejohnson1976 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 But it can also mean you are interested . I would rather send an email and if he sends one back I would think he was not into playing games,.. I hear you.....its a FINE line.
Mary3 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 I hear you.....its a FINE line. Actually its a very clear line. You either go on there and decide you aren't going to play games... Because most smart girls will SEE it very soon and stop talking to you. Be yourself. Be honest. Be respectful. Even if 50% on there don't want to...
b52s Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 Thats because 99.9% of the profiles are LIES. Many have NO goals , ( and alot more lacking , take your pick ) I had that. One man wrote very lonnnnnng eloquent letters but refused , absoulutely refused to talk on the phone. This went on for months. Did not want to call or meet. MOST are cut and paste . Getting them to SAY anything after that...forget it...as you found out. You know what the secret is : Just wrote one line sentence , like a greeting sentence. Like "I love your dog in the picture....Any man worth his salt will make an attempt to make a short paragraph back,.( if interested ) DANGER : BE very leery of those really LONG letters in which the spelling is kinda strange, they tell you how much they love you , they live in Nigeria or UK ( no offense to anyone there ) but I am referring to the Nigerian Scammers...Those sickeningly sweet letters are designed to eventually remove money from your wallet. There pics are fake. Please NEVER send money to anyone , ever. ( unless its a family member , someone you know ) Agreed....I had met women that were in the habit of chatting online or emails....but when you tried to get their number to escalate it further....they'd give me the , "I"m not ready yet" line or "I'm not comfortable." Even after weeks of conversing. One time, I said, "Listen, are we actually going to meet in person or what?" She told me to stop being so pushy then told me to stop emailing her.
Mary3 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 Agreed....I had met women that were in the habit of chatting online or emails....but when you tried to get their number to escalate it further....they'd give me the , "I"m not ready yet" line or "I'm not comfortable." Even after weeks of conversing. One time, I said, "Listen, are we actually going to meet in person or what?" She told me to stop being so pushy then told me to stop emailing her. BIG RED FLAG ! She might be married. She might be overweight. Whatever she is , she does not want to meet. And for those who say don't rush things. You should know after 2 weeks if you want to meet for coffee... Never delay that stuff more than 2 weeks. I know you will get different advice. But 2 weeks tops. Then stop the emails. Move on...
sagetalk Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 Agreed....I had met women that were in the habit of chatting online or emails....but when you tried to get their number to escalate it further....they'd give me the , "I"m not ready yet" line or "I'm not comfortable." Even after weeks of conversing. One time, I said, "Listen, are we actually going to meet in person or what?" She told me to stop being so pushy then told me to stop emailing her. Don't put up with that crap about them not giving you their number. Odds are they are talking to a bunch of other guys and they are dragging you along. Don't be confrontational with them though. Just back off your communication with them and find another girl. Online dating is tough, you gotta go for her number quick. If you don't get it, you're more than likely not going anywhere with her.
hopesndreams Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 The trick is to find the profile that doesn't have the typical bs in it. After awhile, all the profiles sound the same and there is no difference from one to the next. They all become a blur. Then, when you least expect it, you stumble upon one that is not like the others. Send a quick, short message and the sooner they respond, the better. I would rather have someone respond right away then wait hours or days knowing that they are online and chatting up loads of other women or in Steve's case, pretending they are. Which, in my opinion, is a lie right off the bat. Who wants to be lied to? No one. You get caught out pretty early for doing that.
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