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When/How did "Nice" Become Pejorative ??

TheWatcher

By TheWatcher
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skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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Another friend of mine was in a 6 month relationship with a girl but basically answered her beck and call. He even went so far as to risk a DUI by drunk driving her and two of her drunk friends 45 minutes out so they would all get home. She got bored with him and they broke up a few months later.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

exactly. act "nice" , do "nice" things for her & it is certain you will get dumped

muse08 Established Member

muse08

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...if you have a gf, just start treating her "nicely" you will be sent down the road before you even know what happened

 

Come on...so not true.

skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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Come on...so not true.

 

 

 

 

if you have a gf, try it. especially if you want to break it off. just start treating her "nice" and you won't have to go through the pain of dumping her, because she will, in fact, dump you first

muse08 Established Member

muse08

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Another friend of mine was in a 6 month relationship with a girl but basically answered her beck and call. He even went so far as to risk a DUI by drunk driving her and two of her drunk friends 45 minutes out so they would all get home. She got bored with him and they broke up a few months later.

 

 

exactly. act "nice" , do "nice" things for her & it is certain you will get dumped

 

That whole situation is a bit crazy to begin with. Going out and getting drunk to me is for losers. It only gives people an excuse to be an *ss. However, in your friend's case he was drunk as well , am I correct? So when you're doing what you know isn't right, how can you call someone else on it...or expect other people to think clearly. When you date someone who gets drunk from time to time, EXPECT PROBLEMS and impaired judgement.

 

Y'all better chill out on the a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-alcohol.:cool:

muse08 Established Member

muse08

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if you have a gf, try it. especially if you want to break it off. just start treating her "nice" and you won't have to go through the pain of dumping her, because she will, in fact, dump you first

 

I'm a str8 female. Don't plan on ever dating women no matter how bad it gets. Sorry to mess up your fantasy;)

muse08 Established Member

muse08

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I think a lot of guys distort the difference between treating a girl like crap and teasing her a bit.

 

What do you mean by this?

skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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I'm a str8 female. Don't plan on ever dating women no matter how bad it gets. Sorry to mess up your fantasy;)

 

 

 

 

 

i date plenty of women

skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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let me guess muse, you are the kind of girl who prefers a weak, sweet "sensitive" guy who wont stand up for himself right? the typical "beta male" yea sure

littlebittle Established Member

littlebittle

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Hmm, I've never NOT dated a nice guy.

muse08 Established Member

muse08

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i date plenty of women

 

I think you misunderstood me. I was just saying that "I" don't plan on dating women.

 

Was just responding to your post when you said "if you have a girlfriend, try it".

skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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I think you misunderstood me. I was just saying that "I" don't plan on dating women.

 

Was just responding to your post when you said "if you have a girlfriend, try it".

 

 

 

 

 

oh. truly sorry about that

skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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Hmm, I've never NOT dated a nice guy.

 

 

 

 

& i bet YOU dumped every one of them

muse08 Established Member

muse08

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let me guess muse, you are the kind of girl who prefers a weak, sweet "sensitive" guy who wont stand up for himself right? the typical "beta male" yea sure

 

lol...what? why would you say that? i like a man who is sensitive to me when necessary, but I can't stand a weak man! I have a strong personality so I NEED a man with a backbone to put his foot down...when it's time to. This is why I broke up with my ex.He was not very assertive and that made me not trust his judgement. I'd be afraid of having to be the one to stand up for us both. Plus he had too many issues going on in his life.

 

You should read my previous posts...and some prior threads.

skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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lol...what? why would you say that? i like a man who is sensitive to me when necessary, but I can't stand a weak man! I have a strong personality so I NEED a man with a backbone to put his foot down...when it's time to. This is why I broke up with my ex.He was not very assertive and that made me not trust his judgement. I'd be afraid of having to be the one to stand up for us both. Plus he had too many issues going on in his life.

 

You should read my previous posts...and some prior threads.

 

 

 

 

exactly my point you cant STAND a weak man that is the perfect one word descrption for a beta male, a "nice guy"

littlebittle Established Member

littlebittle

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& i bet YOU dumped every one of them

 

Ha, nah. I've been in 4 long term relationships. One was a genuinely mutual breakup (we dated for 2 years and it just sort of evolved into friendship). That was four years ago. We're still best friends, he just got married this past summer and I was in the wedding. Um, let's see... I got dumped by two of them. One was my first boyfriend, and when we went away to college we had to do the long distance thing and it just didn't work. He broke up with me and I was heartbroken for so long! It took me awhile to get over that, but we still talk from time to time, he's a good guy. Then my most recent boyfriend broke up with me because he's not over his ex. It was definitely really sad, but an amicable split. Then yeah, I did dump one guy. Again, it was a time/distance issue. I really cared so much about him, but he traveled so much for his job, and we ended up growing apart. Still friends with him, too!

 

I don't know, they were all nice people and I still love all of them, even the ones who hurt me. I really have learned something from every relationship I've been in. None of those guys were a-holes or douchebags. Just genuinely kind-hearted, sweet, altruistic. That's really what I look for. I'm a social worker, and I see a lot of sad stuff everyday, so I like to be with someone who is not only strong and supportive, but also positive and compassionate towards others. I just steer clear of anyone who seems mean, bitter, manipulative, immature, selfish, etc.

muse08 Established Member

muse08

Posted
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exactly my point you cant STAND a weak man that is the perfect one word descrption for a beta male, a "nice guy"

 

You're a funny guy. I'll bet you're just as sweet(NICE) as can be;).

 

Try reading from the top of this thread. I like the nice/nice guy, which is the kind who is really nice,but when a female or anyone else does something out of line or disrespectful he won't hesitate to put someone in check. THAT is what I like...that's what I need.

 

That kind of guy is still a nice guy. He just has assertiveness where the other nice/weak guy doesn't.

b52s Established Member

b52s

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It comes from, "he's nice, but boring"

 

 

"Nice" is someone a woman would finally settle down and marry....otherwise, she's just looking for a fling or something not so serious when dating.

 

But....this whole "boring" thing isn't prevalent to just women , but American society as a whole.

 

We live in a disposable society.

 

But, you can draw a relationship between spoiled little kids who get tired of a new toy rather quickly, to a woman who gets bored of a man.

 

It's a shame actually.

skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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You're a funny guy. I'll bet you're just as sweet(NICE) as can be;).

 

Try reading from the top of this thread. I like the nice/nice guy, which is the kind who is really nice,but when a female or anyone else does something out of line or disrespectful he won't hesitate to put someone in check. THAT is what I like...that's what I need.

 

That kind of guy is still a nice guy. He just has assertiveness where the other nice/weak guy doesn't.

 

 

 

thanks for the compliment but i'm not sweet. (but i've been told i'm funny @ times) but a "nice guy" will NOT put someone in check when they are out of line. hell, he'd probably hide behind you and expect you to take care of it

shadowplay Established Member

shadowplay

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I love the nice guy though, who puts his foot down (in a respectful way) when it's time to...it's really sexy!

 

MEN: Pay attention to this! This is what a woman likes. She wants to date a guy who is kind, but has the confidence to drop her without hesitation if she ever crosses the line. She can tell a guy is like this by how he relates to her and others. Does he let other people walk all over him, or does he set boundaries?

Edited by shadowplay
Pizzaman81 Established Member

Pizzaman81

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... but has the confidence to drop her without hesitation if she ever crosses the line....

 

My problem is... i tend to drop everyone, and I end up alone. Where is this going.. i don't know. Have fun!

shadowplay Established Member

shadowplay

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My problem is... i tend to drop everyone, and I end up alone. Where is this going.. i don't know. Have fun!

 

Maybe you're just picky. Do you drop people for legit reasons?

muse08 Established Member

muse08

Posted
Posted
MEN: Pay attention to this! This is what a woman likes. She wants to date a guy who is kind, but has the confidence to drop her without hesitation if she ever crosses the line. She can tell a guy is like this by how he relates to her and others. Does he let other people walk all over him, or does he set boundaries?

 

You know you're not right for that...Twisting my words. Men DO have the ability to reason and use their brains right? Don't you? Just because a man is assertive and puts his foot down to disrespect and nonsense, doesn't mean he's an a-hole. Why can't a man be assertive and nice at the same time?

 

I don't see how an assertive man equates to being mean/cold/callous...b/c it doesn't mean the same thing, lol...

 

Come...on...

shadowplay Established Member

shadowplay

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Posted
You know you're not right for that...Twisting my words. Men DO have the ability to reason and use their brains right? Don't you? Just because a man is assertive and puts his foot down to disrespect and nonsense, doesn't mean he's an a-hole. Why can't a man be assertive and nice at the same time?

 

I don't see how an assertive man equates to being mean/cold/callous...b/c it doesn't mean the same thing, lol...

 

Come...on...

 

huh?? :confused:

muse08 Established Member

muse08

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huh?? :confused:

 

Was just responding to you b/c it sounded like you were being facetious.

shadowplay Established Member

shadowplay

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Was just responding to you b/c it sounded like you were being facetious.

 

Uh, no...

 

 

 

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