CaspianDreams Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 I've gone out with a girl 4 times (over the last month or so), things have been decent, with a few kisses, reasonably good chemistry, etc. (definitely on the slow side, but there's been some interuptions with trips, etc., so it's fine with me - although I'm not sure if it's fine with her (she hasn't mentioned anything though) ). Now we're a ways away from each other for the holidays and won't see each other for at least another week, is a lighthearted, holiday e-mail a good idea, should I call, text, or should I not bother with holiday communication? As for the situation, there generally isn't much, if any, contact, e-mail, calls, or texting, between outings. I'm tempted to just call her in a few days to catch-up, but was wondering what other peoples' takes were. That said, is the e-mail, call, or text the best way to procede given the minimal communication while we're both away, or should I just forget about any contact all together until we're both back in town to set up another date? For that matter, should I try increase commnication level, or is the rare contact fine for this point in the cycle? Just trying to learn the lay of the land - any insight would be great, thanks!
Kiley12 Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Has she generally been responsive to your communication efforts? If so, I would say she is interested in you. If I were the girl, I would love to get at least one phone call over the holiday break. See how she reacts to the call and if positive I'd increase the communication - whether it be a follow up call in a few days or a text/email every other day. It's always nice to see a guy making an effort to keep in touch!
Author CaspianDreams Posted December 26, 2009 Author Posted December 26, 2009 She's generally been responsive. So Xmas letter or not? I'll likely call her on Sunday or Monday evening, unless every one's screaming contact her today. By Monday, I wouldn't have had any contact for a week, and it would likely be about another week until I could see her again. The historic levels of contact make me wonder what to do. So quick letter/text now with a call in few days, or just wait and call in a few days so I don't seem as in her face? Or after 4 dates, do most women like more contact than 1-2 times a week.
Kiley12 Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 I say send her a text or a quick light-hearted email now (one or the other not both) and call her on Sunday evening. I don't think that's too much at all. You've been on 4 dates with her so there's obviously an interest on both sides. She has to see that there's some progression and you're taking it up a notch. If I haven't heard from a guy I've been on 4 dates with after a week, I would be really frustrated and feel like he's giving me mixed signals. I also like contact more than 1-2 times a week or I would feel disconnected from him.
Author CaspianDreams Posted December 26, 2009 Author Posted December 26, 2009 What kind of contact do you generally prefer - a few texts/e-mails a week, a call or two, date or two...just curious to see what an actual girl prefers as opposed to what I'd assume. Would you prefer contact essentially every day after 4 dates, every other day, signfinant contact like chatting on the phone for half an hour, or just a brief e-mail/text to let her know you're around? And would it seem strange to increase contact level, given the historical levels of contact?
Author CaspianDreams Posted December 26, 2009 Author Posted December 26, 2009 How important is it to give her the impression that I'm really interested after just a few dates? I've heard conflicting stories, ranging from keep a distance to seem interesting, non-clingy, etc. to the other, end of the sprectrum. Anyhow ideas when the frequency of contact should increase - or am I way behind the curve. Honestly, our schedules haven't been the best over the past month, which has led to contacting each other rather infrequently, but it wouldn't be hard to do a bit more.
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