curiousnycgirl Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 To breaking no contact, but I didn't. My ex's daughter in law, who is 8 months pregnant, was in the hospital last night. Heading in to surgery for an infection in her hip. There was a slight possibility that the ex's second grand child was going to have to be born early. So they called me. I was soooo close to calling him to let him know. I figured it was something he had more right to know than me - actually I should not be in the equation anymore. But I didn't! I am very proud of mysef. I figured if his son wanted him to know, he could call his own darn father. Although his son still doesn't know about the breakup - but that's also not my problem. He'll probably figure it out today when his father calls him to wishi them all a merry Xmas and know nothing. Immediatley upon waking up this am, I checked my blackberry for the umpteenth time, hoping he would have at least sent an email. Nope - he's really way past me and us. OMG the heartbreak! I don't think I'll ever understand how this could ahve happened to me/us.
xpaperxcutx Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Well, you're not really over the ex. Expecting his email is evidence enough that you have to remain in NC. I don't know what happened, but from the sound of it, it seems like he was the one who broke things off. You should try finding things to preoccupy yourself with. And no more contact with his family.
Author curiousnycgirl Posted December 25, 2009 Author Posted December 25, 2009 Heck no I am NOT over him, and have never pretended to be. Yup staying NC - and keepig myself busy - tyvm
worlybear Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 I really feel for you. I am lucky in that I still have most of my family with me today but ,despite a heroic effort to move on I am very aware that my ex is with ow and her family, leaving his own family marginalised. It is very hard to let go and not dwell on the past with rose coloured glasses. Christmas is a desperately difficult time for so many people- lets all just grit out teeth and aim for a brighter future in 2010. Good luck and I really hope life gets better for you.
GrayClouds Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 To breaking no contact, but I didn't. My ex's daughter in law, who is 8 months pregnant, was in the hospital last night. Heading in to surgery for an infection in her hip. There was a slight possibility that the ex's second grand child was going to have to be born early. So they called me. I was soooo close to calling him to let him know. I figured it was something he had more right to know than me - actually I should not be in the equation anymore. But I didn't! I am very proud of mysef. I figured if his son wanted him to know, he could call his own darn father. Although his son still doesn't know about the breakup - but that's also not my problem. He'll probably figure it out today when his father calls him to wishi them all a merry Xmas and know nothing. Immediatley upon waking up this am, I checked my blackberry for the umpteenth time, hoping he would have at least sent an email. Nope - he's really way past me and us. OMG the heartbreak! I don't think I'll ever understand how this could ahve happened to me/us. that is a very big step for you CnyG. you hsold be proud. Not only have you stuck to NC, but you resisted your instincts to rush in and take care of the situation. Your are learning healthy boundaries, which is major acknowledgment of your own value. Congratulations, well done Ma lady. What are you going to do to celebrate this progress?
Author curiousnycgirl Posted December 25, 2009 Author Posted December 25, 2009 that is a very big step for you CnyG. you hsold be proud. Not only have you stuck to NC, but you resisted your instincts to rush in and take care of the situation. Your are learning healthy boundaries, which is major acknowledgment of your own value. Congratulations, well done Ma lady. What are you going to do to celebrate this progress? Well I did all kinds of volunteer stuff earlier today - so feeling good about that. Figured I'd come home and try to watch some of the movies the ex left me (while they are still in my house). Chatted with his daughter in law on my way home, only to find out that he actually sent them Christmas presents! I was stunned. I always took care of all Christmas and Birthday gifts, discussed it with him of course. And he never even attempted to reimburse me. Now that I'm gone he can reach into his pocket?! On the one hand I am glad for him and them. On the other hand I am so sad for me - and hearing you GrayClouds in my head saying I told you so. Hurts. ALOT. Only thing I still don't understand is why he hasn't told them about the break up yet. Leaves me puzzled, but I just can't think about it anymore. I've spent for too long trying ot figure him out - clearly with no success. Merry F*cking Christmas.
Author curiousnycgirl Posted December 26, 2009 Author Posted December 26, 2009 really hoping for some answers from you smart people, so I'm shamelessly bumping my post back up.
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