cognac Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Where are all the women? I remember going out on a thursday night maybe a month ago, relatively nice night and everything, me and my friends went to atleast 25 bars throughout manhattan (walked a LOT) looking for places where the ratio of men to women was atleast equal, and out of the 25 only 2 were favorable (and both were "dive" type bars, downstairs from the real bar), the girls were hardly down to earth though and really bourgeois- JAPy/WASPy upper class types, and this is in the "City that never sleeps"! It defies logic, where are all the accessible, not ugly, single women hiding? Are they all in the fancy nightclubs I can't afford to go to? Sometimes I think it's harder to even MEET a woman who is not ugly, is single, and socially accessible in New York than it is to become a millionaire. Not only am I at a disadvantage by being short, poor, and not having a car, but the odds are ridiculously against me when there are 6 guys (many who run laps around me in looks, money and macking powers) for every 1 woman, and sometimes that 1 woman is a prostitute! (I actually love hookers to be honest so I'm happy when they are) It's hard NOT to be lonely in this crappy city. Not to mention the few women I meet in social situations are HARDLY approachable, beautiful, ugly, short, or fat, all of them think they can do better, (and unfortunately, many times they can!!!).
SoulSearch_CO Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Don't know. Considering the ratio is 81 single men to 100 single women. I thought I had read a few places that it was harder for a woman to find a man in NYC than the other way around. http://www.epodunk.com/county_data2/mw33.html
Author cognac Posted December 25, 2009 Author Posted December 25, 2009 Don't know. Considering the ratio is 81 single men to 100 single women. I thought I had read a few places that it was harder for a woman to find a man in NYC than the other way around. http://www.epodunk.com/county_data2/mw33.html Those statistics are misleading. It is almost universal that women outlive men, creating more single women than men (elderly). Add all the "career" women who are married to their job and money, and hence are single out of choice (outside of some random sexual encounters with a very small fraction of extremely good looking, lucky men) and you have even less. I do see plenty of women per se all the time. But they are all 50 and up! OK looking girls my age who aren't complete morons and are attracted to me in any way all have boyfriends without exception, a line of guys waiting behind for their turn. Instead, I would love to see the ratio of men to women in the 18-30 crowd, there are definitely more men! Every young person centered event, from house parties, to bars, are complete sausage fests. There's just an extreme shortage of females to date, to bang,to talk to, to do anything with at all.
jerbear Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Cognac, I know what you mean, not all cities are like that. There is always someone bigger, more mack, more money, more power, influence, etc... The thing about NYC is that everything is bigger and better and if it does not work out there are 8 million plus more people to meet. The city never sleeps and is very mobile and disposable unfortunately. If the relationship does not work for you, you just bail and move on to the next one. Singles in cities like the south, west, Boston, DC, even Minneapolis have different views. Just that NYC has more "disposable" relationships. Depending on your job, aka not 9-5, you might be able to hit on the clients'! (yeah I've done it and it was with NON-DIRECT clients, example is one of their staff or them but not the one that signs or authorizes payment)
xpaperxcutx Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Just that NYC has more "disposable" relationships. Absolutely. People break up so easily around here, because the thing about is people in NYC are more shallow and demanding. They always want something bigger and better. Hence the problem isn't that there aren't any attractive women ( because there are plenty) it's just that, according to you, you're " short, poor, and doesn't have a car".
Beerme Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Its funny because I lived in NYC for 2.5 years, and found it the easiest city for me to meet women. There are so many single people there. It seems a lot of people move there for work, and don't have their usual circle of friends, so everyone is looking to make new friends. I'm a pretty outgoing guy, and just being somewhat friendly in a bar/grocery store/party usually lead to some pretty decent conversation.
Woggle Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 You have to venture outside of upper Manhattan to have any real success. Unless you are some yuppie with loads of money you will not get anywhere there.
Beerme Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 You have to venture outside of upper Manhattan to have any real success. Unless you are some yuppie with loads of money you will not get anywhere there. This wasn't the case for me though. I'm more a blue collar worker, but during my 2.5 years there, I had two somewhat serious relationships. Both of them were lawyers, and they didn't have any issues with my job or my salary. Maybe my situations were more the exceptions than the rules.
Throne Of Lies Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Yeah, you are going to do a lot better for yourself if you start engaging women wherever you see them, instead of just in designated zones. If you see something you like, take a shot at it right then and there, don't wait until that night and try to track her down in one of thousands of bars across the city. That said, meeting chicks in the Williamsburg area bars is about as hard as picking change up off the ground. Especially if you are under 30, clean cut, and don't look like a hipster. That might seem counter intuitive, but give it a try, you will be pleasantly suprised.
Author cognac Posted December 25, 2009 Author Posted December 25, 2009 Its funny because I lived in NYC for 2.5 years, and found it the easiest city for me to meet women. There are so many single people there. It seems a lot of people move there for work, and don't have their usual circle of friends, so everyone is looking to make new friends. I'm a pretty outgoing guy, and just being somewhat friendly in a bar/grocery store/party usually lead to some pretty decent conversation. Maybe you are an exceptionally good looking guy who is tall and has big muscles. Am I right? Depending on your job, aka not 9-5, you might be able to hit on the clients'! (yeah I've done it and it was with NON-DIRECT clients, example is one of their staff or them but not the one that signs or authorizes payment)[/Quote] Well I work crappy retail in a relatively quiet and little neighborhood, so I see the same customers every day. I would feel extremely awkward, since unlike other situations, if a woman rejects me where I work I'll still have to see them and deal with them after. Hence the problem isn't that there aren't any attractive women ( because there are plenty) it's just that, according to you, you're " short, poor, and doesn't have a car".[/Quote] Yeah I know. Although I have a lot of things going against me, I'm still relatively decent looking and have a pretty entertaining personality (According to all the people who know me). I don't expect a supermodel, just a girl who is like me, and they're almost impossible to find (or have a boyfriend).PErsonally I don't even bother looking at the very good looking women of this city, so it's not that Im too picky. This year I met 5 women and I thought i was in heaven, then it came to late that 4 had boyfriends they were keeping a secret, and 1 moved away. Just god awful luck. Yeah, you are going to do a lot better for yourself if you start engaging women wherever you see them, instead of just in designated zones. If you see something you like, take a shot at it right then and there, don't wait until that night and try to track her down in one of thousands of bars across the city. That said, meeting chicks in the Williamsburg area bars is about as hard as picking change up off the ground. Especially if you are under 30, clean cut, and don't look like a hipster. That might seem counter intuitive, but give it a try, you will be pleasantly suprised. [/Quote] I don't know, I feel kind of pathetic doing that. You'd be surprised at how many men there are who go around chatting up women wherever they go. The other day some guy was doing it on line at my store, and the girl asked me to call security! I've been tempted to hit on one of my customers but again my situation of having to see them afterwards, I would be pretty ashamed. By asking a woman out and her rejecting you, she is essentially cementing her superiority over you, and I think women thinking they are better than me is not a fun idea. (considering I am better than them).
pandagirl Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Dating in NYC is no easy task -- period. Actually, let me rephrase -- find a relationship in NYC is no easy task. Finding a date should be no problem though.
Throne Of Lies Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 I've been tempted to hit on one of my customers but again my situation of having to see them afterwards, I would be pretty ashamed. By asking a woman out and her rejecting you, she is essentially cementing her superiority over you, and I think women thinking they are better than me is not a fun idea. (considering I am better than them). First off, you aren't 'better' than any group of people. You are better than some, and worse than some. Secondly- if you don't approach a woman because you are afraid that you will fail and she will assert superiority over you, then you have already failed, because you assume she is superior to you. Your baseline assumption HAS to be that your approach will work, and if it doesn't, nothing bad will come of the attempt. If you are operating under any other paradigm, you will have very limited success.
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