Another lonely Christmas

[betamanlet]

The odds are about the same as some sending me snippets of posts that include you divulging personal info about your previous "conquests". A ton of people tried to help you on other boards, and you threw them all under the bus. Whatever it is you have has to stop, it's beyond being unhealthy.

 

PS: Am I assuming you have no facts, btw?

 

 

You're not her. And what "conquests"? What personal information?

[McGrupp]

go read "the power of now"

 

anxiety is just worrying about the past or the future. live in the now man.

 

just breathe in this moment and realize nothing else matters.

 

also...fat girls

[betamanlet]

go read "the power of now"

 

anxiety is just worrying about the past or the future. live in the now man.

 

just breathe in this moment and realize nothing else matters.

 

also...fat girls

 

 

Thanks, I'll check out that book.

[jw90063]

OK - are you a qualified therapist? Are you able to help him through this time? My point is that I see nothing productive whatsoever about coming on an online forum to bitch and moan about how ****ty one's life is. Get off your ass and go do something about it if it's that bad. If things are truly as bad as he says about the anxiety - GO TO A THERAPIST. Nobody here has a magic wand to fix him.

 

I have some incredibly ****ty things going on in my life right now. I know for a fact that nobody on here can magically fix them - therefore, I choose to do something to fix them - not sit and bitch and moan about it.

 

Not only that - I'm a little uptohere with "FML" posts. Things are NOT that bad. Give me a break.

 

Why do I have to be a qualified therapist to not criticize his first post in this thread and make ridiculous accusations against his character.

 

I simply was suggesting therapy, which is obviously a good idea. Maybe he just felt like venting, and needed some encouragement. I highly doubt referring to someone as a loser at a computer, and making sarcastic comments about him being a good catch is the way to go.

 

There isn't enough evidence based on this thread that he is a troll. Also, what if someone wants to bitch and moan about something. Do they not have the right to do so on here? I know some other members have been doing a little too much whining lately which is annoying, but not everyone is on here primarily for that. I think that is rude, to tell someone to get off their a** and do something about it and quit whining. I agree, especially at his age, its TIME to do something, but in this situation, he clearly has some issues holding him back. It's not as easy as it looks. If your anxiety level is not equivalent to his, you just don't get it.

 

So what if he is a troll, and just on here to whine? Why not wait and see what else he has to say before labeling him.

 

you mean he's talking about having a "meaninful relationship"? i must have missed that

 

He never said he was just looking for sex.

go read "the power of now"

 

anxiety is just worrying about the past or the future. live in the now man.

 

just breathe in this moment and realize nothing else matters.

 

also...fat girls

 

Let me guess, you don't have anxiety, nor do you know how it can be.

[imagine]

Virgin,

 

I did not want to post today but.... I feel the need to share this with you -I lost my virginity at 39 (nearly forty). I regret that I was not married. Getting married- required me to adjust my lifestyle to marriage, and later children. This did require stress on both me and my wife.

 

I had choices that prevented my marrying any of my previous girlfriends. I did feel lonely for many years attributable to my pursuit of "manly" interests. I was declared a "mans man" and despite friendly contacts - none of the ladies were suitable. Rest assured that I had very sexual desires but did not act on them.

 

I did end up marrying the "Belle of the ball". She is three years older than me and still turns heads. Many of my colleagues and my friends were jealous. This was only God's providence. She was the divorcee of an abusive husband. She had determined to raise her daughter in a proper manner without the intrusion of men. She knew only me after her divorce and had acquired the name "Icelady" from the time after her divorce.

 

A good friend of mine is fifty two, and still a virgin. He too would like to have met a good woman, but is presently focused on his business. Do not think that you are alone in this predicament.

 

I wish you well and a merry Christmas!

[betamanlet]

Why do I have to be a qualified therapist to not criticize his first post in this thread and make ridiculous accusations against his character.

 

I simply was suggesting therapy, which is obviously a good idea. Maybe he just felt like venting, and needed some encouragement. I highly doubt referring to someone as a loser at a computer, and making sarcastic comments about him being a good catch is the way to go.

 

There isn't enough evidence based on this thread that he is a troll. Also, what if someone wants to bitch and moan about something. Do they not have the right to do so on here? I know some other members have been doing a little too much whining lately which is annoying, but not everyone is on here primarily for that. I think that is rude, to tell someone to get off their a** and do something about it and quit whining. I agree, especially at his age, its TIME to do something, but in this situation, he clearly has some issues holding him back. It's not as easy as it looks. If your anxiety level is not equivalent to his, you just don't get it.

 

So what if he is a troll, and just on here to whine? Why not wait and see what else he has to say before labeling him.

 

 

 

He never said he was just looking for sex.

 

 

Let me guess, you don't have anxiety, nor do you know how it can be.

 

 

Maybe the book helped his anxiety. I found a cheap used copy of it on amazon and bought it. All I know is that I have crippling anxiety, and I would love to get rid of it.

[McGrupp]

no...if you read my old posts on the coping forum, i had huge anxiety after being dumped.

 

huge. didnt sleep for 3 weeks, lost 35 lbs. basically suicidal with a huge tinge of anxiety and depression.

 

then it hit me after i read that book.

 

anxiety is mostly that. it was me overanalyzing things i couldve and shouldve said, and me being super worried ill never find someone again and things that relate to that.

 

so yeah, ive had anxiety and still do...but i also learned to just let go.

[jw90063]

no...if you read my old posts on the coping forum, i had huge anxiety after being dumped.

 

huge. didnt sleep for 3 weeks, lost 35 lbs. basically suicidal with a huge tinge of anxiety and depression.

 

then it hit me after i read that book.

 

anxiety is mostly that. it was me overanalyzing things i couldve and shouldve said, and me being super worried ill never find someone again and things that relate to that.

 

so yeah, ive had anxiety and still do...but i also learned to just let go.

 

 

Oh interesting, but though you call people losers on their computers. That's good you fault the anxiety, but you don't need to make others feel like losers because they haven't.

[jw90063]

Oh, also McGrupp....

 

You said you had anxiety after being dumped. Many people have that sort of anxiety. It's called general.

 

I think the OP has more along lines of social anxiety. That makes he hard to socialize, meet women and more.

 

That's definitely more difficult to beat than temporary anxiety caused by being dumped. Trust me I've known people who developed anxiety or panic attacks because of a specific situation in their lives, they will never truly understand severe anxiety that has been with you a lifetime.

[McGrupp]

i would agree with that. perhaps i was too intoxicated when i wrote the "losers" comment.

[v g]

Assuming he's not a troll, he needs to get help as soon as possible.

 

Lord knows even if he is a troll that there are others reading this thread that are in similar situations.

 

I'm not looking to just get laid, I want a loving relationship and marriage.

 

Me too.

 

 

go read "the power of now"

 

anxiety is just worrying about the past or the future. live in the now man.

 

just breathe in this moment and realize nothing else matters.

 

Thanks for this info.

[phineas]

Christmas eve.

The kids are in bed, i've got beer & i'm in my boxers.

No woman in site.

 

I'm quite content.

[Green]

Well if you've never been kissed then I say you just kiss a girl. Next time your at a party and talking to a girl just kiss her! that is if she is a potential love interest (not married ect.)