Artist Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 My ex and I dated for about 10 months. I was not big into face book but kinda got into half way into our relationship. I sent her several requests to put me up as in a relationship with her to which she said she would but never did. I never thought much of it as I was not that into facebook. Months later she breaks up for the third time. After a week I send a text telling her I agree we should not date but I am happy to be friends if she wants. She gets furious with me and starts telling me how she is looking at my facebook page every day and crying every night since the breakup. I tell her I am looking at her page too. I say three times is too much and if anything needs to change she will have to initate it. She says she will. WTF?????? A few days later she puts up at 11 pm that she is in a relationship with this guy that has been her friend for a long time. I look at their history and there is nothing that looks even slightly romantic in their posting. But of course it rips my heart out. So she put that up at 11. By two am I am still a friend. I put on my page a quote about betrayal by those who love us under my profile pic. There is no way she will see this unless she goes to my profile. I do this at 2 am. I get up at 6 am and she has unfriended me sometime between two and 6 am which means she was up looking at my profile. So my question is did she do this just to hurt me?
Beeotch Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 My ex and I dated for about 10 months. I was not big into face book but kinda got into half way into our relationship. I sent her several requests to put me up as in a relationship with her to which she said she would but never did. I never thought much of it as I was not that into facebook. Months later she breaks up for the third time. After a week I send a text telling her I agree we should not date but I am happy to be friends if she wants. She gets furious with me and starts telling me how she is looking at my facebook page every day and crying every night since the breakup. I tell her I am looking at her page too. I say three times is too much and if anything needs to change she will have to initate it. She says she will. WTF?????? A few days later she puts up at 11 pm that she is in a relationship with this guy that has been her friend for a long time. I look at their history and there is nothing that looks even slightly romantic in their posting. But of course it rips my heart out. So she put that up at 11. By two am I am still a friend. I put on my page a quote about betrayal by those who love us under my profile pic. There is no way she will see this unless she goes to my profile. I do this at 2 am. I get up at 6 am and she has unfriended me sometime between two and 6 am which means she was up looking at my profile. So my question is did she do this just to hurt me? It seems she is doing all this to get under your skin.... It is all very childish...but most of us are guilty of doing something silly like that at some point or other.... My advice is: people can play games and be foolish for but so long, they eventually grow weary of it and get tired of being foolish ESPECIALLY when it is ignored. Therefore I suggest you ignore her Facebook and other mediums and live your life, don't be malicious in return or constantly check it and wonder about it...the truth always floats...so eventually it will come to light without you doing anything about it
Author Artist Posted December 24, 2009 Author Posted December 24, 2009 Can you tell me what you mean might come to light? I have been in NC for 19 days and am feeling much better. I had been in NC for two weeks but she sent me a long email so 19 days since she sent that.
LovelyDaze Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 It seems she is doing all this to get under your skin.... It is all very childish...but most of us are guilty of doing something silly like that at some point or other.... My advice is: people can play games and be foolish for but so long, they eventually grow weary of it and get tired of being foolish ESPECIALLY when it is ignored. Therefore I suggest you ignore her Facebook and other mediums and live your life, don't be malicious in return or constantly check it and wonder about it...the truth always floats...so eventually it will come to light without you doing anything about it Beeotch is correct. There is a way to avoid anyone on Facebook short of deleting them of course. My ex is still on mine. He used to put ooey gooey stuff about his fiancee' and as of late has been talking trash and both have "battled" insinuating quotes amongst each other. It's ridiculous. I NEVER go to the Home page or Status Updates because all kinds of friends show up on there. I physically have to click on an actual friend to see what they are up to and talk back and forth. I'm sure my ex and his fiancee is still trying to show off their mess of a relationship but hey...I don't know because I don't look!
Author Artist Posted December 24, 2009 Author Posted December 24, 2009 Yes I agree. I have not looked at her page since the deleting a month ago. Just curious about her actions.
LovelyDaze Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Yes I agree. I have not looked at her page since the deleting a month ago. Just curious about her actions. And whatever you do...PLEASE don't ask to be friends with her again on any social network. MY ex and his new fiancee' fighting each other on Facebook should have made me happy but I don't play games with the heart. It made me sad, actually. Love is not an arena like my ex thinks it is. Not a game, not a movie, not a romantic tug of war. It is supposed to be safe and warm and above all else...honest. I will let my ex drown in his own crap. He is leaving for Afghanistan anyway. There is gonna be a whole YEAR where I can heal without dealing with him. Hope you heal too and never look back!
blackbear_703 Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Since my break-up I haven't paid much attention to my ex's Facebook, etc. updates. I've only looked a few times and those few times she's only talked about partying, getting drunk, or suffering from a hangover all morning. Or any combination of the three. It's pretty sad really. If you don't want to see updates from the ex, just move your mouse cursor over the right of one of their status updates and click on "Hide." That should hide all of their updates. You can also go into your settings and hide their application updates.
LovelyDaze Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Since my break-up I haven't paid much attention to my ex's Facebook, etc. updates. I've only looked a few times and those few times she's only talked about partying, getting drunk, or suffering from a hangover all morning. Or any combination of the three. It's pretty sad really. If you don't want to see updates from the ex, just move your mouse cursor over the right of one of their status updates and click on "Hide." That should hide all of their updates. You can also go into your settings and hide their application updates. Hey, blackbear_703!! Can the other person tell if you have hidden their updates, statuses, etc? I don't want my ex to know that I don't want to look at his status updates.
blackbear_703 Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Hi LovelyDaze! If you just click on "Hide Posts From...", he won't know anything. However, if you hide your posts from him or restrict him from other parts of your Facebook profile, he probably will notice that if he's still paying close attention to your profile. If you want to see what he sees, go to Options>Privacy>Profile Information>Preview My Profile and type his name in the box that says "This is how your profile looks to most people on Facebook." Oh, and another thing I forgot to mention: After clicking the little black Hide box in the corner of his post, be sure to click the second Hide box to hide his posts permanently. Otherwise it'll hide them for just one Facebook session and when you log in again they'll reappear!
Angel1111 Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Yes I agree. I have not looked at her page since the deleting a month ago. Just curious about her actions. She sounds like a total psycho to me. Totally ridiculous behavior.
Author Artist Posted December 24, 2009 Author Posted December 24, 2009 Thanks Angel. I think she may be borderline or a narsistic. I am now learning how being with these kinds of people can have a kind of brainwashing effect so you doubt yourself so it is very helpful to hear coments that affirm her behavior is as bad as it feels. It helps me let go. Many thanks.
LovelyDaze Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Hi LovelyDaze! If you just click on "Hide Posts From...", he won't know anything. However, if you hide your posts from him or restrict him from other parts of your Facebook profile, he probably will notice that if he's still paying close attention to your profile. If you want to see what he sees, go to Options>Privacy>Profile Information>Preview My Profile and type his name in the box that says "This is how your profile looks to most people on Facebook." Oh, and another thing I forgot to mention: After clicking the little black Hide box in the corner of his post, be sure to click the second Hide box to hide his posts permanently. Otherwise it'll hide them for just one Facebook session and when you log in again they'll reappear! Thank you so much, Blackbear!!! It is done and I feel so calm. My heart eased into a calmer beat!
blackbear_703 Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 No problem at all LovelyDaze and glad to help! Have a very Merry Christmas...esp. now that the ex's daily updates are safely out of view!
LovelyDaze Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 No problem at all LovelyDaze and glad to help! Have a very Merry Christmas...esp. now that the ex's daily updates are safely out of view! You too! For us that don't want to do the defriending thing, hiding updates is a Godsend! I recommend it to all Facebook users that don't want to see ANYONE'S updates anymore. Thanks, again!
HLP234 Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Yeh these sites can be annoying. My girl and I are on a break and she can post all kinds of stuff about what she is doing on myspace and I can see it and I don't like it at all. One of my friends that knows the situation between us got a hold of my phone while I was in the bathroom at a small club (we had our own table and I forgot to grab my phone, lil too many drinks) and it was logged on to facebook and they put my status as something along the lines of me hanging out with a lot of girls last night. Today I noticed she removed me from her top friends on myspace lol, but didn't even say anything to me at all. Yet before this happened she can put statuses about her staying over some dude's house, and I didn't remover her from my friends.
blackbear_703 Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 What's strange is that my pic and all the romantic messages I left for my ex on her sites are all still there. She hasn't deleted them. I've figured all along it's b/c she is usually too busy to update her sites, but after she avoided discussing her feelings for me last week when I asked her and stormed off when I told her we are supposed to be friends now like she wanted (after giving me a pretty romantic hug and kiss), I dunno. Personally I managed to stop logging on and checking out her updates weeks ago and now I'm focusing on stopping the habitual e-mail/SMS checks, which is easier said than done! I don't plan to change my e-mail or cell phone number this time around since it would be too much of a hassle and I would inevitably end up losing touch with people besides my ex!
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