delnoire Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Females, I just wanted some feedback. I know that confidence in a guy is probably the main deciding factor in whether or not her appears attractive to women. Keeping that in mind, I am always conscious of either being confident in myself, or at least seeming to be confident in myself concerning my interactions with women. And I've had good to modest success with women because of it. Can't say I'm a heavy player or anything but i've made a few conquests in my day. That said, there are two things which have always been huge setbacks for me in the confidece department and I need your input ladies to help me come to terms a little, with them. One, I've got an underbite. For those of you that don't know, an underbite is when the lower jaw sticks out farther than the upperjaw. Kind of like Butthead from that cartoon Beavis and Butthead. My underbite isn't particularly large or anything, but still, in my insecure mind it constitutes a facial deformity and so I convinced that every time I approach or flirt with a girl, she is thinking 'Oh my god!! Look at that underbite!!! What an ugly freak!!!" and sometimes its hard for me to maintain my confidence as my insecurities get the best of me. I know it shouldn't, I mean, my underbite doesn't affect they way I talk or eat, it doesn't hamper me in any way physically, but it makes me doubt myself. Sometimes i think that any girl I might be trying to 'date' will always take a guy without an underbite before me. So ladies, is an underbite a huge turn off? Even if you got to know the guy like...over the phone or over the net and you really liked him and then you met him in real life and he had an underbite, would it suddenly be a deal breaker? (this is if the guy had never lied about the way he looked beforehand, but didn't mention his underbite) Just for the record, I haven't ever met a woman off the net for dating purposes, so this is hypothetical. Would I be obligated by decency to tell the woman that I had a underbite before we met. I mean, most women would never think to ask the guy if they have any facial deformities or not. On to my second insecurity. I'm a thin guy. I'm six feet even about 120 pounds. I just can't ever seem to gain weight. I know girls don't like skinnny guys, but its not something I can help. So ladies, if a guy is as thin as I am, is it really a huge turn off? Somewhat of a turn off? And which is the bigger turn-off (or rather, which should I feel more insecure about?) an underbite or being very skinny? I know most of you women are probably thinking 'When I like a guy it doesn't matter to me what he looks like.....' I know this, but right now I want your honest, totally superficial and shallow answers. You can be as blunt and direct as you like. I don't get offended easily. I just really want to hear once and for all what females think about this. thanks.
Awesome Username Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 If it isn't particularly large, it shouldn't be that much of an issue. In fact, sometimes it can define a man's chin a little more. BTW, Butthead is my cartoon husband.
Strych9 Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 what does the rest of the face look like? how do you carry it?
Author delnoire Posted December 23, 2009 Author Posted December 23, 2009 If it isn't particularly large, it shouldn't be that much of an issue. In fact, sometimes it can define a man's chin a little more. BTW, Butthead is my cartoon husband. Its not particularly large, but its not miniscule either. In fact, the underbite is not so much what I'm self conscious of. Its my chin which is a result of my underbite. I've a longer chin than the average face. A few of my friends call it a 'jay leno' chin (though I must put a disclaimer here that that any resemblence to Jay Leno and me ends there!) If my chin wasn't so long, then my underbite would be much less noticable, but my chin draws attention to my jaw. Butt-head, you will notice, has an underbite but a small, attractive,, dainty chin.
Author delnoire Posted December 23, 2009 Author Posted December 23, 2009 what does the rest of the face look like? how do you carry it? The rest of my face luckily is normal. My nose is well defined, dark penetrating eyes. Being as skinny as I am, my cheeks have a somewhat gaunt thing going on which I don't mind at all, as it would look weird for a stick man like me to have big fat jowls right? How do I carry it? I don't know quite how to answer that. What do you mean? How should I carry my face, given my underbite? I mean, how should I carry it so that it is more attractive or less of a turn off?
MeganDoll Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 You are msitaken if you think a women doesnt care what a guy looks like Looks are just as important to us as they are to Men, if were not physically attratced to a man theres no chance we would be with him no matter how nice he was
Vintage79 Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I'm not a girl, but I'd guess being very skinny is the bigger turn off, unless the underbite was crazy (which it doesn't sound like it is). I'm a slender guy myself, at least I think I am, but at 6 feet and 160-165, I'm quite a bit different than you. I know for a fact, that even with my build, I've run into some ladies that want a bit more meat. One of the primal desires of women is to feel like the guy can protect them, and with an overly thin build, making them feel safe and protected can be rough. I'm just calling it like I see it, and drawing off my past experiences. As for how to carry your face - well, you'd probably need to show some pictures (which may or may not possible here). Besides, what can you honestly do, aside from differing levels of beard, hair cut, hat and/or glasses? That said, a broad/large chin is considered an attractive feature by many women, as it tends to generate a broader looking face...not sure how it looks on you, but just the basic description doesn't sound like too much of a deal breaker. FYI: Definitely try to add some weight, based on the standard BMI index, you're considered severely underweight, and being in that weight category actually has a larger negative affect on your life expectancy than being over weight. If you honestly can't gain weight, it might be good to see a doctor/nutritionalist/etc. for your general well being as something may be wrong.
Strych9 Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 You can tell when people are trying to hide certain features, I love when a man has crooked teeth and he's trying to hide it by laughing into his sleeve, or trying to hide it with his tongue. Just makes me want to see them laugh even more. Do you carry it with confidence? Judging by this post, it's a hangup. Would you post a photo of yourself?
PJKino Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I'm not a girl, but I'd guess being very skinny is the bigger turn off, unless the underbite was crazy (which it doesn't sound like it is). I'm a slender guy myself, at least I think I am, but at 6 feet and 160-165, I'm quite a bit different than you. I know for a fact, that even with my build, I've run into some ladies that want a bit more meat. One of the primal desires of women is to feel like the guy can protect them, and with an overly thin build, making them feel safe and protected can be rough. I'm just calling it like I see it, and drawing off my past experiences. Protect them from what? The boogieman?
Simon Attwood Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Well actually it's Beavis that has the underbite
Dolos Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I would be more concerned about the weight thing than the underbite. Unless its pretty big most people probably don't even notice the underbite, like you said you're just self conscious about it so you think they do. But six feet and 120? That seems really underweight. Im just thinking about it compared to myself, im six four and weigh about 165-170, and im pretty damn skinny. There might be some sort of medical reason you cant put on weight, did you bring it up with your doctor?
Author delnoire Posted December 23, 2009 Author Posted December 23, 2009 You can tell when people are trying to hide certain features, I love when a man has crooked teeth and he's trying to hide it by laughing into his sleeve, or trying to hide it with his tongue. Just makes me want to see them laugh even more. Do you carry it with confidence? Judging by this post, it's a hangup. Would you post a photo of yourself? I have crooked teeth btw....just saying.... But yeah, I think I carry it with confidence, outwardly. Only because I'm always ultra conscious that I have to otherwise I'd never be able to land a date. Is it a hang-up in my own mind? Definitely. But hopefully I don't let it show. I don't have the guts to post a pic of myself even though I know it would help all of you women give a more informed piece of advice. Is it against the rules to post an e-mail addy? Probably....
temple Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 You've pretty much described Louis Theroux in which case I'd say you sound good to me Oh, and assuming you're not Theroux, I'd say the underbite is a bigger turn off than the skinniness.
Strych9 Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 You've pretty much described Louis Theroux in which case I'd say you sound good to me Oh, and assuming you're not Theroux, I'd say the underbite is a bigger turn off than the skinniness. That is a handsome devil if I ever saw one!
Author delnoire Posted December 23, 2009 Author Posted December 23, 2009 I would be more concerned about the weight thing than the underbite. Unless its pretty big most people probably don't even notice the underbite, like you said you're just self conscious about it so you think they do. But six feet and 120? That seems really underweight. Im just thinking about it compared to myself, im six four and weigh about 165-170, and im pretty damn skinny. There might be some sort of medical reason you cant put on weight, did you bring it up with your doctor? My doctor, and past doctors have always been aware of my weight problem. I can't say my bill of health is clean, but I'm not disabled in any way nor would there be any baggage brought into a relationship as far as functioning from day to day. Just the symptoms one would expect from one of my height and weight. Easily exhausted. Hands get the shakes sometimes. Gets faint sometimes with too much exertion. But I'm by no means bedridden and I my job keeps my physically active every day. Never been on any medication or had any major health issues. I think its just in the genes. I have a ten year old daughter, normal appetite and everything and she's a rail-thin waif like her father but healthy all the same. So....it sounds like the weight issue is a bigger turn-off than the underbite....a surprising turn of events. I've always been much more self conscious of my underbite. That actually makes me feel a little better.
Author delnoire Posted December 23, 2009 Author Posted December 23, 2009 (edited) Well I can't say I look anything at all like the guy in that pic so I guess I'm ugly, but anyways, here's a fellow who looks much closer to what I look like, except my hair is much darker and somewhat shorter. P.S. this man was considered a mutant in his day, because of his jaw. I hope this link works since I've never posted a link before.http:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Juan_de_Miranda_Carreno_002.jpg If it doesn't work, just go to wikipedia and look up charles the second of spain. Edited December 23, 2009 by delnoire
PJKino Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Gain some wieght,women today are more repusled by skinny guys then fat guys
sonicranger Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 I'm kinda in the same camp, with the weight thing that is. I'm 6'2" and about 160, so I'm thin. Here's the thing tho, I am THIN but I look good because I maintain a bare minimum workout routine. I do pushups and situps and similar home exercises to keep my physical appearance. When I take my shirt off, it shows that I do SOMETHING, rather than just sitting around. So, as far as that is concerned you might want to try that, little by little you'll at least LOOK better tho you might not gain any weight.
kiss_andmakeup Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 I'd be willing to be that the underbite is something you notice way more than other people. I haven't seen your face to it's very hard for me to say, but I'd guess that if you have a decent looking face, having an underbite or a strong chin wouldn't make that much of a difference. The weight thing, however, would be a very big turn off to me. I am 5'8 and 110lbs and most people consider me a skinny girl! So I can only imagine how thin you are! I tend to like more stocky men. However, that said, it's a VERY personal preference and I do have friends that love skinny guys. Do you get hit on by bigger women a lot? I tend to see a TON of large/overweight woman with super skinny man couples. Not knockin' it, just very curious!
Surfer Girl Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 I am with a skinny guy with crooked teeth as the physical aspect doesn't play into the fact of the personality.... I find him very attractive because his confidence and witty charm makes him more attractive....
Star Gazer Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 6'/120 pounds for a guy is sickly thin, bordering on anorexic...if not already anorexic. (For reference, Christian Bale is 6' and lost weight to get down to about 125 for his role in The Machinist. http://cdn-www.cracked.com/articleimages/wong/balejuice1.jpg) And Temple, Louis Theroux is 165 pounds, not 120. So the weight would be much more of an issue for me than any underbite.
Throne Of Lies Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 (edited) If you look like that Wikipedia guy, the underbite is going to be a more severe problem, as it is impossible to conceal with clothing. Can you not have it repaired orthodontically? I understand they might have to do some hacking on your mandible, but if it looks like that, it might be worth it. The weight thing is a big issue- but I wouldn't worry about it too much. Do this- Every day for 2 weeks, write down what you eat. Don't try to eat more or less, just eat whatever you feel like, but make an annotation in a notebook every time you eat of what you ate and how much you ate. You will see that you really don't eat as much as you think you do, as you might gorge one day, but then eat 400 calories the day after that. Skinny people don't have faster metabolisms, contrary to popular belief, rather their mind simply suppresses their hunger if it's caloric requirement for homeostasis has been met. It is an interesting evolutionary feature found only in ectomorphs that you will have to overcome to become a more healthy weight. Good luck! Edited December 24, 2009 by Throne Of Lies
SoulSearch_CO Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Well actually it's Beavis that has the underbite I'm glad I'm not the only nerd that knew that.
v g Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 For me, too slender is a turn-off. My ex was very slender. I remember the first time I saw him with his shirt off. He looked so frail. I was afraid of hurting him, and I'm itty-bitty. I got over it and past it, but it was distracting in the beginning.
BobSacamento Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 I believe the majority of women want to look thinner than the person they are dating. Given the rarity of a slender woman these days it is more beneficial for a man to be less slender. Or less frail, however you want to put it.
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