dashing daisy Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 he called me the love of his life, now 2 months later he says he doesn't love me, but he cares about me as a friend... why are guys such ****ing *******s
Limbo21 Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 False hope & mixed signals are not exclusive to men. I'm testimony to that. For what it's worth I feel your pain Daisy, I feel the same - heartbroken
curiousnycgirl Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 He went on a major vacation with me (I paid), planned trips (that I would pay for) through the end of next year - then told me every time I open my wallet I cut his balls off. I gave him 5.5 years of unwavering support and love - when I told him I couldn't take him hurting me anymore he said "ok bye." Yup I feel your pain. Hugs to you
DustySaltus Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I'm sorry Daisy. I know where you are coming from. I thought I would be married by now after I had mad so many sacrifices to be with her. Nothing was ever good enough and it made me feel like I wasn't good enough at one point. But now when I look back I realize that I am capable of great things and those great things we shouldn't waste on someone that doesn't appreciate us. Not all men are like this just like I know most women are not like my ex. There's a reason that this happened. I know it sounds cliche' but there's no doubt about it. I've been through tough relationships in the past as well but i'm still here. And if i'm still here after all i've been through, you're going to be just fine.
teanoranges Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I get so annoyed when I notice how much this happens to so many people. Its like life is a script that everyone has the same one, and we're all too dumb to look ahead.
Author dashing daisy Posted December 23, 2009 Author Posted December 23, 2009 I think I'm losing my mind. How could he just stop loving me? He considers himself single and is looking for someone better...
Kantor Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I think I'm losing my mind. How could he just stop loving me? He considers himself single and is looking for someone better... I know, its horrible isn't it. I joined here less then a month ago in the same spot, how can someone just change how after four years... (granted my situation is a little different, I caused her change in behavior.) Every day you'll make it further, you'll have your ups and downs (we all do). Many here find that No Contact is what you need to move on and push through these tough times. Were all here for you *hugs*
LovelyDaze Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I know, its horrible isn't it. I joined here less then a month ago in the same spot, how can someone just change how after four years... (granted my situation is a little different, I caused her change in behavior.) Every day you'll make it further, you'll have your ups and downs (we all do). Many here find that No Contact is what you need to move on and push through these tough times. Were all here for you *hugs* You know why he can just change at a drop of a dime? Because he is no good at relationships. That is not to say that every dumper is cold hearted but the way most of them do it, is. Your ex(and many of ours) did not even want to resolve whatever he felt was broken. Says he just wanted to bail and wash his hands completely of it. No answer he'll give you will make sense because he doesn't know what the hell he wants himself. You can't ask an illogical person logical questions. It doesn't work. We all KNOW the hurt you are feeling. We feel we are the ONLY ones in the world walking around trying to piece together a broken heart. But look around LS. There are MANY of us, hell there are millions of other sites with people who are feeling the same way and don't forget the ones who don't go on sites at all that are crying over an ex right now!!! We have fallen in love before, we will again. Trust me.
Author dashing daisy Posted December 23, 2009 Author Posted December 23, 2009 Thank you. I just can't stop beating myself up, I can't believe I didn't see this coming, I can't believe I let him break my heart, I can't believe I put myself in this position. This is just the worst feeling. Why does this happen? I can't believe all of us feel like this, why do we even bother with relationships??
curiousnycgirl Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Thank you. I just can't stop beating myself up, I can't believe I didn't see this coming, I can't believe I let him break my heart, I can't believe I put myself in this position. This is just the worst feeling. Why does this happen? I can't believe all of us feel like this, why do we even bother with relationships?? That is exactly my current dilemma!
Eisenhower Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Daisy, I watched the same thing happen to me from my ex. I actually sent her back the stack of effusive love letters she sent me over the preceeding year. I guess I wanted her to realize (tangibly) the hypocrisy of all those commitments ... "You're the man of my dreams; I never knew what it was like to be with a good man; I want to be with you forever; we (her kids and her) need you in our lives," etc., etc. I'm starting to really fear I'll never give my heart away again, because I watched her change in the span of a couple short months - I don't know how I'll ever trust again. Anyway, I know how you're feeling. If I could give you a hug I would, cuz I know it's hard. Eisenhower
Author dashing daisy Posted December 24, 2009 Author Posted December 24, 2009 Daisy, I watched the same thing happen to me from my ex. I actually sent her back the stack of effusive love letters she sent me over the preceeding year. I guess I wanted her to realize (tangibly) the hypocrisy of all those commitments ... "You're the man of my dreams; I never knew what it was like to be with a good man; I want to be with you forever; we (her kids and her) need you in our lives," etc., etc. I'm starting to really fear I'll never give my heart away again, because I watched her change in the span of a couple short months - I don't know how I'll ever trust again. Anyway, I know how you're feeling. If I could give you a hug I would, cuz I know it's hard. Eisenhower It's so awful, I don't understand how they can say all these things. My ex said similar things, even when he broke up with me. "I want to spend every day with you forever" "I feel like you are my perfect match" He called me the love of his life...I don't understand how people can say these things and then just give up and bail so easily. If I really felt those things, I would at least make an effort, not just throw it away at the first sign of difficult. It's bull****. I can't imagine being in another relationship, although he says he is looking for one. I still want to throw up when I imagine him holding someone else. I can't imagine him being here and not being with me. If circumstances were really what got in the way, and circumstances changed, how could he not want to be with me? It can't be circumstances...if you really love someone you will try to make it work. He absolutely insisted that we stay together over long distance, saying he would be able to do it no problem, then dumped me by e-mail 11 days after I had gone to visit him. I can't imagine ever trusting someone again. I'm sorry you are going through this too, it feels absolutely terrible. I'd give you a hug too. This is so hard.
Sunset Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Do not contact...make him wonder what he is missing, the ones who contact usually regret it later, keep the mystery, keep him wondering at what you are doing. Hurt his ego, he expects you to miss him and will start to wonder why you aren't getting in touch...wasnt he such a big part of your life, how could you possibly not be missing him. Even if you are, dont let him know. Trust me, its a mind game, play him at his own game only better. Read why men love a bitch. Will work especially well with a to$$er. Big hugs to you x
kimmi Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 I think I'm losing my mind. How could he just stop loving me? He considers himself single and is looking for someone better... Try finding your ex after over 6 years together on a dating website and there opening line is " I can finally find that special one now" said to friends "hell is finally gone" "I never loved her" "It is the sweetest thing being without her" That hurt to see it at first and I kept on looking at it shocked but in the end he is right. He thought he loved me but in fact he never did really. I am okay with this also. One day we all look back and see it all. ((HUGS TO YOU))
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