calizaggy Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Well what has this thread taught me? Men in the USA need to lobby for legalized prostitution. Often times having sex with the wrong coniving woman can lead to a lifetime of financial slavery, or worse, prison. And nobody cares. So ladies, ok you are right. Men need to take "responsibility" for a child that is only "theirs" when it comes to paying for it. Hopefully more men will start using professionals so they do not have to worry about a lifetime of financial slavery because YOU wanted a baby so badly.
theBrokenMuse Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Well what has this thread taught me? Men in the USA need to lobby for legalized prostitution. Often times having sex with the wrong coniving woman can lead to a lifetime of financial slavery, or worse, prison. And nobody cares. So ladies, ok you are right. Men need to take "responsibility" for a child that is only "theirs" when it comes to paying for it. Hopefully more men will start using professionals so they do not have to worry about a lifetime of financial slavery because YOU wanted a baby so badly. Misogyny, strawmen and whining all in one post - That is quite the hat trick - Kudos to you, sir!
aerogurl87 Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Oh this reminds me of that song Gold Digger by Kanye West "She got one of your kids got you for 18 years I know somebody paying child support for one of his kids His baby momma's car and crib is bigger than his You will see him on TV Any Given Sunday Win the Superbowl and drive off in a Hyundai She was supposed to buy ya shorty TYCO with ya money She went to the doctor got lypo with ya money She walkin around looking like Micheal with ya money Should of got that insured got GEICO for ya moneeey If you aint no punk holla We Want Prenup WE WANT PRENUP!, Yeaah It's something that you need to have Cause when she leave yo a** she gone leave with half 18 years, 18 years And on her 18th birthday he found out it wasn't his"
Sam Spade Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 (edited) Well what has this thread taught me? Men in the USA need to lobby for legalized prostitution. Often times having sex with the wrong coniving woman can lead to a lifetime of financial slavery, or worse, prison. And nobody cares. So ladies, ok you are right. Men need to take "responsibility" for a child that is only "theirs" when it comes to paying for it. Hopefully more men will start using professionals so they do not have to worry about a lifetime of financial slavery because YOU wanted a baby so badly. In many primitive, and some more recent, cultures hookers were respected. Also, hookers were the first real independent women. It's called the world's oldest profession for a reason (this reason). Illegal prostitution merely drives the usiness underground and increases the likelihood of unreported violence against women. Edited December 23, 2009 by Sam Spade
Awesome Username Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 This thread makes me sick. Where the Hell has sense gone? Do people REALLY not care about their children like this? Do men not care if they're sleeping with idiots and psychos as long as they're hot, believe them when they say they can't have kids, and refuse to bag it up unless they can see themselves having children with someone someday? There are all rhetorical questions because I know the answers. No wonder kids are so materialistic these days - there's no morals or love from their parents anymore so they have o fill the void with SOMETHING. By the way, my braces were over 6,000 dollars.
Awesome Username Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Also, it shouldn't ONLY be the women's job to get child support sorted out. If this paper claiming that he doesn't need to pay child support holds any credibility, it will be a non-issue and he will simply not have to pay. If it doesn't, then he let her deal with everything and didn't do his legal research. If you just let a women deal with the fallout of a kid and going to court and organizing everything, then don't be surprised if the judgments are in her favor.
meerkat stew Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Because for every "poor dude" story you hear, I'd just about guarantee there is more to the story. You have it a bit backwards, for every legitimate child support dodging deadbeat dad story, there are ten "poor dude" stories. You just don't hear about all the poor dudes because a) nobody cares as they aren't women, children or minorities and b) their ex wives "transform" them into deadbeats via the female propaganda machine and facile attorneys.
flc Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 (edited) You have it a bit backwards, for every legitimate child support dodging deadbeat dad story, there are ten "poor dude" stories. You just don't hear about all the poor dudes because a) nobody cares as they aren't women, children or minorities and b) their ex wives "transform" them into deadbeats via the female propaganda machine and facile attorneys. Sorry when it comes to child support I don't buy this. The amount you pay is a percentage of your income. The percentages I have seen are reasonable and you certainly would be paying at least that amount if you were married and taking care of a child. If you don't want the responsability but want the sex then get a vasectomy. Alimony on the other hand is still archaic and unfair. I am paying my ex 30% of my net for life unless she gets married or I retire. I am perfectly find paying for a fixed period of time say 5 years until she gets additional skills and gets into the job market but why do you have to support an ex wife for life when you don;t have to support a child with child support for life? Edited December 23, 2009 by flc
calizaggy Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I wonder why "deadbeat dads" are so hated, yet "single moms" seem to be the saints of today. Neither apparently have enough money to raise a child, yet one is despised, and the other is felt sorry for. Maybe women should keep their legs closed instead of being so easy? But instead they choose to not take precaution,allow the man not to use a condom, choose to not have an abortion, then choose to raise the child. I have dated more than a few women who are about 27- 30, no kids, single, and insist I do not wear a condom, and insist they cannot get pregnant..Then I might bump into them a couple years later or see them on facebook and they are single moms, or married with kids..
meerkat stew Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Sorry when it comes to child support I don't buy this. The amount you pay is a percentage of your income. The percentages I have seen are reasonable and you certainly would be paying at least that amount if you were married and taking care of a child. They vary from state to state, some states more severe than others. Monies are spent on the hyper-indulged U.S. children today to an extent that my parents and their peers would have howled with laughter at, and ironically, with all the guitar lessons and extraordinary expenses showered on today's kids, the generations of children and teens I see out and about are some truly vapid, physically unhealthy, intellectually stunted, spoiled brats of the highest order, so at least all that money is well spent while Dad is in debtors prison .
flc Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 (edited) They vary from state to state, some states more severe than others. Monies are spent on the hyper-indulged U.S. children today to an extent that my parents and their peers would have howled with laughter at, and ironically, with all the guitar lessons and extraordinary expenses showered on today's kids, the generations of children and teens I see out and about are some truly vapid, physically unhealthy, intellectually stunted, spoiled brats of the highest order, so at least all that money is well spent while Dad is in debtors prison . Do you have children? Daycare = $150/wk depending on the age of the child Food = $100/wk Clothes = $50/wk 50% college savings = assume typical state college costs $120,000 for a four year degree Medical? So $1500-$2000/mo for child costs for a single parent is not unreasonable is hardly indulgent Edited December 23, 2009 by flc
theBrokenMuse Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 (edited) I have dated more than a few women who are about 27- 30, no kids, single, and insist I do not wear a condom, and insist they cannot get pregnant.. My advice is to immediately stop dating tarts who are purposely trying to risk getting STDs or getting pregnant against the odds the second you realize they are that touched in the head. I've heard guys use the whole 'shooting blanks' or 'I'll just pull out' or 'I can't perform using condoms' crap too you know. It's not a one way street. Stop trying to pretend as if it is. Men can be irresponsible idiots and women can be irresponsible idiots - humanity is still quite the work in progress and there are more than just a few morons running around who never use their heads when it comes to sex. Edited December 23, 2009 by theBrokenMuse
meerkat stew Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 (edited) Do you have children? Daycare = $150/wk depending on the age of the child Wonder how many parents seek options to expensive daycare such as neighorhood coops, family etc? None. Food = $100/wk Ridiculous, I spend much less than that per week on my own fully grown adult food, and I eat well. Clothes = $50/wk Ridiculous here also, there is no reason whatsoever to spend $50 per week on a single child's clothing, none. More indulgence. 50% college savings = assume typical state college costs $120,000 for a four year degree Already stated once, college is not a CS issue, and moreover, I do not share the received view that parents are liable for the college education of their children. Most college educations are not worth the money today anyway unless the school is in the national top 50, the expense and opportunity cost have jumped the shark of "increased opportunity/income benefit" years ago. Better to bank the money (if the parent has the wherewithal for such a gift), let them learn a trade or join the military, practice that trade, and pay for it themselves if it becomes a necessity for them to go back. So $1500-$2000/mo for child costs for a single parent is not unreasonable is hardly indulgent Third time now, I have no interest in becoming your or anyone else's financial consultant in this thread. This is the last of such posts I will answer. Happy to discuss the THREAD TOPIC though, if any of you would care to discuss that. Here is an interesting blog that makes the point I've tried to make, but since it's a blog, doesn't share the same space constraints. The comments are also informative. http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4287 Finally, it's completely irrelevant whether I have children or not as far as knowing what things cost, seeing how money is actually spent, and knowing that there are significantly more frugal options. The next person who asks me if I have children will be asked in turn if they have a law degree in financial/tax/business law from a top 25 law school, 10 years experience practicing finance and commercial law, have over 10 years of prior experience as a personal financial consultant, and before that several years of experience as a consumer banker. If you don't have those things on your resume' spare your breath asking me whether I have children or not in an attempt to discredit claims I have made here. Edited December 23, 2009 by meerkat stew
Woggle Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I have a friend who had his daughter's mother run off with a convicted rapist and now she is back and trying to get custody after 7 years. Should he get custody and should she have to pay child support? I just wonder if the same rules apply the other way.
Author b52s Posted December 23, 2009 Author Posted December 23, 2009 Sorry when it comes to child support I don't buy this. The amount you pay is a percentage of your income. The percentages I have seen are reasonable and you certainly would be paying at least that amount if you were married and taking care of a child. If you don't want the responsability but want the sex then get a vasectomy. Alimony on the other hand is still archaic and unfair. I am paying my ex 30% of my net for life unless she gets married or I retire. I am perfectly find paying for a fixed period of time say 5 years until she gets additional skills and gets into the job market but why do you have to support an ex wife for life when you don;t have to support a child with child support for life? What woud happen if you just up and decided to stop paying alimony? Are the consequences just as bad as for not paying Child support?
hotgurl Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 College is NOT a child support issue. Don't include it as such. most child support agreements state that college expenses are to be 50/50
carhill Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 If you're interested in how due process was warped by the Bradley Amendment(s), some of which have been challenged as unconstitutional, Google it or look it up on Wikipedia. Fun stuff. Like I said somewhere else, men have done it to themselves. Makes me so not proud of what our country has become...
hotgurl Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I'm sure someone can spend a million dollars a year raising a child, but that's not what the thread is about The OP's 'friend' had his life and liberty taken from him without due process. Imagine going into a store to buy a gift for your child and your credit card not working, then none of them working. I mean, it's like in 'Enemy of the State'. Don't look up I doubt he had no warning the state is legally required to send out notices. They do try to get the father to voluntarily pay support before using such methods. I don't think anyone mentioned this but in certain states if the single mom at any time goes on welfare the state goes after the dad to pay back the welfare. Thier reasoning being if the dad paid support the mom wouldn't have to be on welfare. So he is responsible to pay it back.
flc Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 What woud happen if you just up and decided to stop paying alimony? Are the consequences just as bad as for not paying Child support? It's a court order and like any court order you would be found in contemp and an arrest warrant issued. Following legal action they would probably have rights to garnish your wages.
carhill Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 (edited) I doubt he had no warning the state is legally required to send out notices. They do try to get the father to voluntarily pay support before using such methods.Google 'Bradley Amendment' and become enlightened. I did. Any arrears, real or imagined, as long as its in the system, becomes an 'automatic' judgment. No notice, no trial, no discovery, no nothing. Witness POW's (that's a prisoner of war, in service of his country) getting arrested and stripped of their rights as soon as they are released. Enjoy the other anecdotes. Like I said, men did it to themselves. Edited December 23, 2009 by carhill
hotgurl Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 I wonder why "deadbeat dads" are so hated, yet "single moms" seem to be the saints of today. Neither apparently have enough money to raise a child, yet one is despised, and the other is felt sorry for. Maybe women should keep their legs closed instead of being so easy? But instead they choose to not take precaution,allow the man not to use a condom, choose to not have an abortion, then choose to raise the child. I have dated more than a few women who are about 27- 30, no kids, single, and insist I do not wear a condom, and insist they cannot get pregnant..Then I might bump into them a couple years later or see them on facebook and they are single moms, or married with kids.. If so many guys did not walk away there wouldn't be so many single moms. Also it is your responsibility to insist on a condom if you are so dead set on not having kids. or keep it in your pants.
hotgurl Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 you guys are so focused on teh money. I find it appaling that most of the men here could easily walk away from a child. Do you ever think about how the child will feel knowing his/her dad doesn't care about them. Have you ever thought about what that does to a child? If the child found you what would you say to them?
Woggle Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 you guys are so focused on teh money. I find it appaling that most of the men here could easily walk away from a child. Do you ever think about how the child will feel knowing his/her dad doesn't care about them. Have you ever thought about what that does to a child? If the child found you what would you say to them? Yet when fathers want to actually see their child and be a part of their lives women do everything in their power to prevent that. It is more about the money than the child to many women.
Awesome Username Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 Most men don't like condoms and want to feel good for the moment, I understand. However, unless you could see yourself ever having children with a woman, you should keep it bagged. If she gets pregnant, he is shocked, and he wasn't wearing a condom, he's not a very bright guy.
carhill Posted December 23, 2009 Posted December 23, 2009 OK, I'll keep it simple. It can work like this with divorce too, changing the appropriate documents. Mom and Dad split up. They agree and 'sign papers' for dad to not be responsible for their shared child. We have no way of knowing if those 'papers' were properly filed with the court or even legal. Let's submit and/or stipulate that it was as the OP stated. Mom and Dad move away and don't see each other again. Mom moves to new state; later, she files an action to collect child support. Due diligence is attempted to locate dad; his whereabouts are 'unknown'. Mom petitions for a default judgment, showing evidence of trying to locate dad. Judge agrees and mom now has an enforceable child support order. A lawyer will give you the proper terminology and procedures, but googling 'default judgment child support whereabouts unknown' should provide a start. Again, I believe all fathers, like my father did for his daughters with the woman who deserted him, should support their children. The OP is about the process, not the moral imperative or philosophy. I will add, philosophically, that it is telling that the action came on or about the child's 18th birthday. Tic-toc
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