drummerprince81 Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 (edited) I've been dating this girl for a couple of weeks. She is very flirty, and talks to me non-stop, and we click very well. We haven't talked about feelings yet but have kissed a few times. Yesterday we spent practically all day together although I regret that I didn't esculate on the flirting. I was wondering do I need to tell her that I really like her to take things further? I don't want to rush the 'becoming official' side of things, but feel like I should communicate my feelings. Basically I want to tell her that I really like her, enjoy spending time with her but don't to want to rush anything and for us to continue having fun. I would love to here people's ideas on the early stages of dating. Edited December 21, 2009 by drummerprince81
Yukikazi Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 If she hasn't friend zoned you yet you are well on your way. All day and you didn't make a move? dude.. your gonna **** it up.. you need to escalate it if you want it to go anywhere..
stevejohnson1976 Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 im in the same situation...so I'm eager to hear some responses....
DustySaltus Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I've been dating this girl for a couple of weeks. She is very flirty, and talks to me non-stop, and we click very well. We haven't talked about feelings yet but have kissed a few times. Yesterday we spent practically all day together although I regret that I didn't esculate on the flirting. I was wondering do I need to tell her that I really like her to take things further? I don't want to rush the 'becoming official' side of things, but feel like I should communicate my feelings. Basically I want to tell her that I really like her, enjoy spending time with her but don't to want to rush anything and for us to continue having fun. I would love to here people's ideas on the early stages of dating. Has she given you any hints that she wants to take things further? And what is your definition of "further", SEX or a relationship? Depending on your answer, there will be different ways of approaching the situation.
yeex Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 No man, no need to tell her that you like her this early. That is always a recipe for disaster. You show her you like her by asking her out again and escalate the flirting and kissing. She will know you like her by showing her. Keep it casual up front and see how it evolves. If you tell her too much up front, it is bound to scare her away.
Author drummerprince81 Posted December 21, 2009 Author Posted December 21, 2009 Yeah, its probably a bad idea to go all out gung ho this early on. I guess I'm just confused whether I should be kissing her not! The signs are there, hands over each other but when I have kissed her it always has been a bit awkward. I'm seeing her tomorrow but I'll just show her I like through appreciation.
stevejohnson1976 Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Yeah, its probably a bad idea to go all out gung ho this early on. I guess I'm just confused whether I should be kissing her not! The signs are there, hands over each other but when I have kissed her it always has been a bit awkward. I'm seeing her tomorrow but I'll just show her I like through appreciation. i would think after 3-4 dates would be the right time to 'lay the smack down', but im struggling with the same thing. some say i blew it by not kissing her on the 2nd date, others say wait until its 'right' wish there was a black and white answer, but you wont find it. go with your gut...
yeex Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Yeah, if you already kissed her and she still wants to see you again, i would say that is success even if the kisses were awkward. Sometimes the first few kisses with a new person can be awkward but they get better. I've been there. Just keep doing it and escalating it further. If she likes you, that is what she wants to happen.
Author drummerprince81 Posted December 22, 2009 Author Posted December 22, 2009 (edited) Yeah, next time I'm gonna act totally different. HOWEVER - the date is tonight at my place. I suggested it, but have also arranged all the dates so far which have been in neutral venues. I haven't heard from her since the weekend. Isn't the onus on her this time, since she'll be coming to my apartment? I do not want to seem too eager or ask if she is still coming over...she is not shy either. Far from it! Edited December 22, 2009 by drummerprince81
BobSacamento Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 Whatever you do, DO NOT tell her you like her. That is so weak. It takes all the fun out of dating.
Author drummerprince81 Posted December 22, 2009 Author Posted December 22, 2009 Yeah, I'm not really planning on that now. But what do I do as regards tonight? I don't want to overdo the contacting but obviously want to know if she is coming or not.
Yukikazi Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 Just prepare for the date and wait. Its on her.. she will either call to cancel, call to confirm, show up or not show up. If she canceles w/o trying to set another date.. I'd start downgrading my attitude towards her and be ready to move on.
Recommended Posts