Lizzie60 Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 I had a fight with my young MM tonite.. not sure if he'll call back.. He just left and said he was very much hurt by my attitude tonite.. Oh well... I might have lost him.. we'll see. I'm just letting some 'steam' out.. Thanks..
Lish Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 I had a fight with my young MM tonite.. not sure if he'll call back.. He just left and said he was very much hurt by my attitude tonite.. Oh well... I might have lost him.. we'll see. I'm just letting some 'steam' out.. Thanks.. Are you prepared to go into detail about why you argued/what was said/why he was upset, or not?
mem11363 Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 Lizzie, You have solid relationship management/navigation skills. What happened? I had a fight with my young MM tonite.. not sure if he'll call back.. He just left and said he was very much hurt by my attitude tonite.. Oh well... I might have lost him.. we'll see. I'm just letting some 'steam' out.. Thanks..
2sunny Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 wait - the young guy who had the baby? i thought you weren't going to see him anymore????
SoulSearch_CO Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 Lizzie, You have solid relationship management/navigation skills. What happened? Yes. Do tell. I can't imagine what could have happened.
Author Lizzie60 Posted December 20, 2009 Author Posted December 20, 2009 wait - the young guy who had the baby? i thought you weren't going to see him anymore???? Yes that's the one... I haven't seen him since the summer.. he's extremely busy.. he has expanded his business quite a bit.. he has now a crew of 18 men working for him.. he bought more heavy equipment.. he works like 80 hours a week.. The baby also keeps him quite busy... they are expecting another one.. just had the results this week.. I had told him about the guy I had met (condo jerk).. that's why he said he would leave me alone for a while.. then he called twice (since summer) but I couldn't see him.. I was busy ... he was a little upset that I couldn't make time for him.. since his schedule is extremely 'tight'... Anyway we had stupid arguments about a few things.. He said he was hurt.. blablabla.. that I was insensitive.. that he loves me.. that he thinks about me a lot.. yadayada.. We live in 'different worlds'.. that's the problem..
Author Lizzie60 Posted December 20, 2009 Author Posted December 20, 2009 Lizzie, You have solid relationship management/navigation skills. What happened? Hahaha.. relationship management skills.. Yabutt ... sometimes the age gap is just too much.. (he's 27 now.. I'm 57) it's like two different worlds.. he's just starting his family.. and I'm already a grand-maman.. Plus at that age.. the sensitivity level is higher IMO..
Author Lizzie60 Posted December 20, 2009 Author Posted December 20, 2009 :eek::eek::confused::confused::mad: huh???............
stampdaddy Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 huh???............ I just don't understand why a 27 year old new father, with another sweet baby on the way, and a wife that is carrying that baby would even think about having an affair... ***nothing personal against you, although I wish you would "counsel" him and getting his stupid head out of his ass (or yours) thats all
Samantha0905 Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 I just don't understand why a 27 year old new father, with another sweet baby on the way, and a wife that is carrying that baby would even think about having an affair... ***nothing personal against you, although I wish you would "counsel" him and getting his stupid head out of his ass (or yours) thats all Yes, it does seem odd. It's not even a very emotionally attached affair -- apparently -- as you rarely see each other. It seems he would be very excited about his young family and the baby-to-be. Does he not love the woman who is carrying his child at the moment? Pregnancy and birth are such a special time in a young marriage.
carhill Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 Lizzie, he's young; work pressures, family pressures and the holidays. His seeming jealousy over condo jerk is another sign. It'll all blow over. Hug the grandkids
hopesndreams Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 Maybe he'll name his next born after you. That would be nice huh?
Gold Pile Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 I just don't understand why a 27 year old new father, with another sweet baby on the way, and a wife that is carrying that baby would even think about having an affair... ***He may not win any hubby/father or the year awards, but he is a 27 year old man, and he's not going to give up on sex with a hot one like Lizzie. Also his life seems full of overwelming responsibilities for his age....that could really make him need the comforting emotional stability of the over 35 woman.
2sunny Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 Lizzie - here's the way i see it - he's busy and has obligations... you are his release from his real world. he just wants you to go along with his temporary "vacation from his life in reality." it hasn't happened and he wants his release - like a little kid throwing a temper tantrum cuz he isn't getting things his way... that's all it is. i guarantee if you just give him what he wants - he will be happy and go away for a while... just like a little kid who ultimately gets his way. maybe you like the manipulation of not giving him his way????? why are you road blocking him? is this your way of controlling him? you give other men their way... charge him like the others and make him be quiet.
stampdaddy Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 He may not win any hubby/father or the year awards, but he is a 27 year old man, and he's not going to give up on sex with a hot one like Lizzie. Also his life seems full of overwelming responsibilities for his age....that could really make him need the comforting emotional stability of the over 35 woman. what the hell ever?!?
Author Lizzie60 Posted December 20, 2009 Author Posted December 20, 2009 Yes, it does seem odd. It's not even a very emotionally attached affair -- apparently -- as you rarely see each other. It seems he would be very excited about his young family and the baby-to-be. Does he not love the woman who is carrying his child at the moment? Pregnancy and birth are such a special time in a young marriage. Thing is.. he does love her very very much... she is his soulmate.. as he says.. and she adores him... he has been cheating on her even when they were just dating.. he always cheated.. she knows about it.. (most anyway).. but she chose to have a family with him.. go figure.. He is now being extremely careful in covering his azz...
Author Lizzie60 Posted December 20, 2009 Author Posted December 20, 2009 He may not win any hubby/father or the year awards, but he is a 27 year old man, and he's not going to give up on sex with a hot one like Lizzie. Also his life seems full of overwelming responsibilities for his age....that could really make him need the comforting emotional stability of the over 35 woman. He would win the father of the year though.. cause he absolutely adores his baby.. he constantly talks about him.. he is a proud dad.. and I'm sure a good dad.. He will never give up on sex on the side.. I don't think... she's been his first gf.. they've been together for 10 years now.. and he has cheated on her for maybe 8 of those years. Like you say.. he is overwhelmed with huge responsibilities.. this guy is a workholic and a very successful businessman for his age.. He likes to come over and talk about his work.. the last piece of heavy machinery he got (I have no clue what he's talking about though.. ).. he is proud of his work.. Some guys will always cheat.. no matter what.. even risking everything they have.. they are addicted to As.. (and it's not always just sex)..
Author Lizzie60 Posted December 20, 2009 Author Posted December 20, 2009 Lizzie - here's the way i see it - he's busy and has obligations... you are his release from his real world. he just wants you to go along with his temporary "vacation from his life in reality." it hasn't happened and he wants his release - like a little kid throwing a temper tantrum cuz he isn't getting things his way... that's all it is. i guarantee if you just give him what he wants - he will be happy and go away for a while... just like a little kid who ultimately gets his way. maybe you like the manipulation of not giving him his way????? why are you road blocking him? is this your way of controlling him? you give other men their way... charge him like the others and make him be quiet. He got what he wanted... I'm not trying to control him.. but he is a 'spoiled' kid.. although very responsible for his age.. and very intelligent.
White Flower Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I just don't understand why a 27 year old new father, with another sweet baby on the way, and a wife that is carrying that baby would even think about having an affair... ***nothing personal against you, although I wish you would "counsel" him and getting his stupid head out of his ass (or yours) thats all He must have really fell in love. Love does not reason.
White Flower Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Thing is.. he does love her very very much... she is his soulmate.. as he says.. and she adores him... he has been cheating on her even when they were just dating.. he always cheated.. she knows about it.. (most anyway).. but she chose to have a family with him.. go figure.. He is now being extremely careful in covering his azz... Hmm, well maybe he has a sex addiction then? It is hard for me to understand how he can call his W his soul mate when he cheats on her.
carhill Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 He compartmentalizes his sex addiction from his emotional devotion to his family. Not uncommon in some men.
2sunny Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 He compartmentalizes his sex addiction from his emotional devotion to his family. Not uncommon in some men. so true. since Lizzie is a separate entity in his mind and she's safe (meaning he feels that his wife will never know about Lizzie) then it is easy for him to separate his married life from his time spent with Lizzie. maybe he doesn't get heard enough at home and wants an outlet of someone to discuss/brag about his business dealings with. maybe he doesn't get sex the way he wants it at home and goes to Lizzie for his fix. maybe he's been busy and distracted with work/home and just wants a temporary escape from reality and knows he gets that with Lizzie. probably all of the above. a good reason to understand that no matter how great a wife/friend and mother one can be - sometimes it's still not enough to keep certain men faithful.
stampdaddy Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 He compartmentalizes his sex addiction from his emotional devotion to his family. Not uncommon in some men. can I get a "Tiger"??? Amen Brother!
bentnotbroken Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Hmm, well maybe he has a sex addiction then? It is hard for me to understand how he can call his W his soul mate when he cheats on her. Ditto....you are right. I don't understand that either.
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