heatherb16 Posted December 20, 2009 Posted December 20, 2009 (edited) Just as I went to title this post, I had no idea that it has already been 6 months since my ex and I broke up. It's crazy how time goes so slow at first, then you find something to occupy yourself with and then time seems to fly. Just a quick recap. We were together for 1 1/2 years, broke up in June, and I thought that life would never go on. Wow, was I wrong. I surrounded myself with friends, the best thing that I have, and to my surprise, managed to cope very well. I know that with most people this doesn't happen, and coping times vary from person to person. I guess I was just lucky. I went through many stages, which confused the heck out of me. I honestly can't recall them all. First, depressed, then angry, then a sense of uselessness (He decided to make out with me a month after our break up), then decency, then hurt, then anger, and all over again. It seemed as if it would never end. The best thing for me? No contact. For myself, and I know many others, this failed many many times. I would keep track in my diary how long I could last. The longest I recorded was about 3 weeks, I believe. I ended up deciding that counting wasn't the best for me. I'd just get frustrated and anxious. So I stopped counting. A few texts later, I realized that we can never be what we wanted to be, or maybe just what I wanted us to be, so eventually my heart gave up on him. Him texting me, I believe, allowed my full closure. About two months ago he texted me, I responded, only because I'm completely over him, and he reminded me why it is that I AM over him. It made me feel 100% sure of myself. He made a complete fool of himself, and I couldn't be more happier that I'm not with him. I, honestly, thank God that my ex broke it off on June 20th. I would have never had the guts to break up with him. Although at the time it seemed as if my world had come crashing down, I now realize the reasoning as to why we are no longer together. In the beginning of October, I received a random friend request on Facebook from an extremely handsome guy. Never in a million years did I think we would still be talking to this day. This situation is a little bit odd. He lives where I live, knows people that I know, but as we began talking I found out that he was in the Army and currently deployed to Iraq. To some people, this seems crazy. We have yet to meet, but chat online every singly day, webcam, and talk on the phone. It feels like I've known him forever. For some reason, I'm holding on. I'm not letting this one go this time. Originally, he was supposed to come home on leave for two weeks in December, but if you know much about the Army, they always change leave dates for Soldiers. He is now scheduled to come home in February. Right now, I'm at a place where I'm just like, ehh whatever, but as February draws near, I know my excitement will rise. Wish me luck I guess all I'm trying to say is never EVER give up. Keep truttin along, because somewhere along the line, something good will come out of this. Whether it's immediate, or maybe takes some time, it will come. I promise. The best advice I can give is to give yourself space and time from your ex, although it may seem rather impossible at times. Maybe later a friendship is possible, but not now. I remember when everyone would tell me that and I would completely deny it. But it's not possible. Those feelings still exist, and even for me at this time, I can't be friends with my ex. Although I am over HIM, it doesn't mean HE is over ME. There still may be raw emotions at the surface. Good luck to all of you and I wish you the best! Much love, Heather Edited December 20, 2009 by heatherb16
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