TaleSpin Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 A guy I'm seeing brings his ex up a lot, which irritates me slightly, but wasn't that big of a deal. Then, I have to hear from a mutual friend how hot this guy's ex is because she was a tiny little girl with giant boobs. Blah blah blah. Then, in conversation, the guy I'm seeing says to me that his ex was one of the best looking girls he's ever seen. I tell him I have no interest in hearing that and he doesn't understand why. UGH. Seriously?
Okeydokey Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 How long ago did they split? It sounds like he hasn't gotten over his attraction to her. Obviously they didn't work as a couple but there is still an attraction there (at least from his side). Have you been able to make further inquiries? Why did they break-up? How long were they together? How long ago did they split up? There was one time when I dated somebody for about six months, which isn't very long, but I kind of fell hard. So, when we split, I thought I have to start dating someone else right away otherwise this is going to drive me crazy. With the new boyfriend, I always used to pine over my ex to him which was not nice or considerate or right. But, it happened and it's kind of a flipside parallel to what you're putting up with.
Author TaleSpin Posted December 19, 2009 Author Posted December 19, 2009 They were together for 5 years and one of the main reasons they split up is because he didn't want to get married. They've been broken up for almost a year and half. Even though it was a while ago, all this talk is making me feel like he's just settling for me because he's lonely or something.
Okeydokey Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Wow that was a decent length relationship. I would feel upset by the situation too. One thing I can say is that in the one similar situation that I had, when I was on the flipside, I did end up growing into the new relationship and caring for the new person. Part of his motivation may be to just try to get his mind off of things. It isn't really considerate that you have to listen to this stuff... But, when I did the same thing to someone else, after a few months of it, I thought "Wow this [new] guy has really put up with a lot from me, and he's been really nice to me, and he's a cool person. I think I'm going to buckle down and give this one a fair shot and stop whining about my ex." So, just because he might be having some ulterior reasons for dating you right now that doesn't mean it can't work... that is if you feel like still being with him at that point.
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