careless Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Hi newbie here, my ex broke up with me about a month ago aftear more than a year together. When we broke up he acted very mean ( cold, distant) so that I know it's over for good.He finally told me it was all an act to make me realised its not possible to get back together. He told me he's sick of our relationship but not ME. Happy that we're not together anymore and he doesn't see a future of us being together and he doesn't want to get back. Since then, I went back home ( very long distance) I called several times after we broke up but I stopped. He always pick up my calls, never ignored me. He said that we can't be friends right not but one day he would like to be my friend. He's keeping a distance to help me move on. I gave him some distance and after a week he texted to see how I;m doing. I didn't reply. Yesterday on IM, I told him to stop playing mind games, because he was really my best friend and him ignoring me ..it's really hard to digest. I am moving on, I need to work on myself .. etc. He told me he moved on but still can't be friends with me right now. He told me he cares a lot about me and is worried about me all the time. He said we cant be friends because it's too hard for me ? He said what if he got a new gf..how would I feel ?? I told him I'll be happy for him and asked him if I'm seeing someone else wont he be happy for me too ?? He said he doesn't know.. ..he added .. "it's too early although I moved on..it will be hard to be happy for something I wont be happy for "? He talked to his best friend ( a girl), he told me he talked long hours about me etc. She adviced him to keep distance and NO contact away from me because he doesn't want to get back and it's too painful for me . He said he's not listening to her, because she just told him what he needs to hear. She knows nothing about us and or about our relationship. He still decides for himself about his relations with me. He still wants to talk to me and he wont forget about me at all. I'm not looking for advice how to get back to him but i would like some input about this situation ? Is he really confused , depressed etc? Thanks
nobmagnet Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 he might have someone else. either way to enable yourself to heal more NC is the way to go. He is trying to ease his guilt by keeping incontact with you and maybe waiting for you to beg him. Dont let him mess with your head any more. It seems to be common that dumpers say things like "how would you feel if I found somone else?" because they already have and its as if they are asking your permission. take care
Recommended Posts