Gold Pile Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 Birch, the gentleman who owns the business next to mine, is the toughest man alive...period. He has sword scars from the Czar's soldiers, bullet wounds from German soldiers in WWII, and assorted other wounds (some fresh) from his long and violent life. You might think him an old soldier but he wasn't...he just gravitated to a good fight. He is over 100 now and tough as ever. Everyday that it doesn't rain or snow, Birch sits on a bench outside his warehouse and drinks a shot of some foul Euro-booze. If the weather is dry he'll be out there even if it's 5 degrees out. It's become a tradition that I and his senior employee (A 200 pound ex-con called "tiny") join him for a shot on the last work day before Xmas. Turning down Birch's offer is to risk the beating of a lifetime. 10 years ago I joined them for our first drink together. The vile potion burned my throat and stomach, I flailed my arms about and (thinking he poisoned me) gasped "why?". "Tiny", a much harder man than I, puts on his poker-face and drinks his shot without flinching. You wouldn't know he was in distress except for his eyes turning red and a slight trembling of his body for a minute or so. Poor Tiny is over 50 now, he passed out last Xmas. When he recovered Birch beat him up for being a sissy. This year (as in the last 9) I will drink half a bottle of antacid before the shot and the other half as soon as Birch walks away. He drinks that crap everyday and walks away. Tiny and I usually wait a few minutes (till the tremors stop) until we dare to walk. All an all it's kind of nice to have special friends like Old Birch.
Art_Critic Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 All an all it's kind of nice to have special friends like Old Birch. Yes it is.. Merry Christmas Gold Pile Tip the second half shot for me
Trojan John Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 P*ssy. J/k. I have to deal with a group of Swedes and their homemade pepper vodka tonight. Great for getting sick and removing paint.
Author Gold Pile Posted December 18, 2009 Author Posted December 18, 2009 :Yes it is.. Merry Christmas Gold Pile Tip the second half shot for me Merry Christmas Art old friend.
Author Gold Pile Posted December 18, 2009 Author Posted December 18, 2009 P*ssy. J/k. I have to deal with a group of Swedes and their homemade pepper vodka tonight. Great for getting sick and removing paint. Have fun. Sounds like the same stuff, except this drink is brown-greenish....not clear.
deux ex machina Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 It is nice to have friends that nearly kill you - it makes you appreciate life all the more. Look at you, looking at the bright side of nearly going permanently Euro-distilled alcohol insane and blind. Accentuating the positive, as always.
threebyfate Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 Merry Christmas and happy holidays, Goldpile. I say you should add to the tradition and bring some 100 proof screech to your next shot-fest. Kick his arse when he goes blind. That's what real men would do!
Author Gold Pile Posted December 19, 2009 Author Posted December 19, 2009 Thank You both for the Holiday Greetings, and Merry Xmas yo you:)
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