calizaggy Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Well for the past 3 months I changed my thinking, and have not been looking for any sort of a girlfriend. I have been busy with work, plan on travelling etc. So I met 3 different girls in the past 3 months..None of which, no matter who they are, was I going to be interested in due to being fed up with dating and a change in priorities. Girl 1.. Asian girl.. We met, ended up going on a date, and it was pretty good. Ended up fooling around. I never called her again, but 5 days later she was sending me sexually suggestive texts. I wrote back the dirtiest things I could think of, and she kept going on about how "sweet" I am.. What? Girl 2: Columbian girl, went out 3 times, ended up having sex.Ignored all of her calls, messages, and texts for almost 2 months in which she expressed more and more feelings in each one. .. I called back once telling her I was busy, and in her next message she asked if I want to live together.. Girl 3 : American girl.. Went out once, had a good date.. Never called again and ignored her texts. .. Sent her a text 3 weeks later saying I have been busy,she replied immediately, and she asked if I am busy on the 19th for a Christmas party.. However, before her, I was dating a woman who I verbally expressed interest in. I returned her calls, planned dates, made myself available, etc and it turned out she was "too busy" most of the time, and "was not emotionally available and not ready for a relationship" when I suggested we see each other more than once a week. It seems a guy appears to be a much better catch when he does not act interested, or even completely ignores them.. I will need to remember this when I am ready for a relationship.
Bejita463 Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 I have difficulty believing any of those three things actually happened, but if they did, having found three psychos in a row doesn't highlight a flaw in women.
torranceshipman Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Bit soon to make assumptions as you haven't even been out on a 2nd date with any of them yet. And avoid number 2-any woman that says lets live together after you met them once is a whackjob.
deebeechrisyo Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Yep, sounds about right to me! I've been on 3 dates with different women this week. The way I figure, the more options you have the less chance you will have of emotionally attaching yourself early on (aka caring). The unintended consequence by not caring, of course, is that you get a lot more attention from the girls. Sound messed up? Yep! Too bad this is how it works now. I do have an interest in one of them, so I'm going to make sure I feign indifference the few times I contact her.
lorangie1 Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 I think all 3 girls just want a **** buddy relationship. Well, not the 2nd girll, she sounds really wacky.
betamanlet Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Well for the past 3 months I changed my thinking, and have not been looking for any sort of a girlfriend. I have been busy with work, plan on travelling etc. So I met 3 different girls in the past 3 months..None of which, no matter who they are, was I going to be interested in due to being fed up with dating and a change in priorities. Girl 1.. Asian girl.. We met, ended up going on a date, and it was pretty good. Ended up fooling around. I never called her again, but 5 days later she was sending me sexually suggestive texts. I wrote back the dirtiest things I could think of, and she kept going on about how "sweet" I am.. What? Girl 2: Columbian girl, went out 3 times, ended up having sex.Ignored all of her calls, messages, and texts for almost 2 months in which she expressed more and more feelings in each one. .. I called back once telling her I was busy, and in her next message she asked if I want to live together.. Girl 3 : American girl.. Went out once, had a good date.. Never called again and ignored her texts. .. Sent her a text 3 weeks later saying I have been busy,she replied immediately, and she asked if I am busy on the 19th for a Christmas party.. However, before her, I was dating a woman who I verbally expressed interest in. I returned her calls, planned dates, made myself available, etc and it turned out she was "too busy" most of the time, and "was not emotionally available and not ready for a relationship" when I suggested we see each other more than once a week. It seems a guy appears to be a much better catch when he does not act interested, or even completely ignores them.. I will need to remember this when I am ready for a relationship. Most women have rock bottom self esteem which makes them seek out drama and challenges.
betamanlet Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 I have difficulty believing any of those three things actually happened, but if they did, having found three psychos in a row doesn't highlight a flaw in women. Untrue. If I treat a woman well, she treats me horribly. The few times I treated women poorly, they became obsessed with me.
lorangie1 Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Untrue. If I treat a woman well, she treats me horribly. The few times I treated women poorly, they became obsessed with me. You must only date incredibly insecure women then.
deebeechrisyo Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 You must only date incredibly insecure women then. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that the majority of the dating pool is insecure. Sometimes we have to make due with what we have to work with.
Bejita463 Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 You must only date incredibly insecure women then. Insecure is a far better choice of word than psycho was. My mind was more on #2 when I chose that word though, and I don't regret the word choice for that one.
Rudderless Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Nothing like the age old story of the playstation kid that suddenly discovers women. It's never a balance with you guys, just one extreme or another. You will never be ready for a relationship the longer you let this go on.
SoulSearch_CO Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 It seems a guy appears to be a much better catch when he does not act interested, or even completely ignores them.. I will need to remember this when I am ready for a relationship. Untrue. If I treat a woman well, she treats me horribly. The few times I treated women poorly, they became obsessed with me. And yet you're both single, desperate, and bitter about women. I'm sensing a theme, here. I'd say a lot of it has to do with the type of women you're interested in attracting. I suppose if you're interested in the type of woman that would be turned on by these games, then great job! You'll get exactly what you're asking for! Sounds like FUN to be in relationship with. Just be ready for the suicide threats when you tell her you're leaving because you can't take her clingy behavior any longer.
betamanlet Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 And yet you're both single, desperate, and bitter about women. I'm sensing a theme, here. I'd say a lot of it has to do with the type of women you're interested in attracting. I suppose if you're interested in the type of woman that would be turned on by these games, then great job! You'll get exactly what you're asking for! Sounds like FUN to be in relationship with. Just be ready for the suicide threats when you tell her you're leaving because you can't take her clingy behavior any longer. Unless I'm rich and famous, I don't "attract" women. I date only the women that don't reject me.
Author calizaggy Posted December 18, 2009 Author Posted December 18, 2009 Well, they are still all women.. I suppose you can make them hyphenated women, (clingy-woman, psycho-woman, insecure-woman) but women nonetheless. I have found that most women are insecure, and often times the most beautiful women are the most insecure.. Logically I would think they would want a guy that makes them feel secure by expressing interest and giving them attention. For some reason that does not work nearly as well.
betamanlet Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 Well, they are still all women.. I suppose you can make them hyphenated women, (clingy-woman, psycho-woman, insecure-woman) but women nonetheless. I have found that most women are insecure, and often times the most beautiful women are the most insecure.. Logically I would think they would want a guy that makes them feel secure by expressing interest and giving them attention. For some reason that does not work nearly as well. LOL maybe you should call her the day after the date. In fact,t he date of the date to tell her you had a great time and can't wait to see her again. ALSO, let her make a decision of where the next day. 99.99999999% chance there is NO second date because of that.
SoulSearch_CO Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 LOL maybe you should call her the day after the date. In fact,t he date of the date to tell her you had a great time and can't wait to see her again. ALSO, let her make a decision of where the next day. 99.99999999% chance there is NO second date because of that. Interesting. You must run into A LOT of women that have low interest in you. The guy I'm seeing - we went on our first date, it was 6 hours long (was SUPPOSED to be just a lunch date). The very next day I mentioned over text message that I was going to be in his town and he asked to see me. Voila - second date. I was HIGHLY interested in him, though - so there's the difference. He's not famous, nor insanely wealthy. We spoke for 10 days over email/text - so it was not a purely physical attraction to begin with...it was all intellectual. Normal human beings attract women everyday - not just the rich and famous ones.
bbasher75 Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 You must only date incredibly insecure women then. But do you understand the majority of women are insecure, especially the more attractive ones? It's very, very sad but it's also reality.
Woggle Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 The worse you treat women the better they treat you and the more they love you. Women see kindness, faithfulness and loving gestures as a sign of weakness.
betamanlet Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 The worse you treat women the better they treat you and the more they love you. Women see kindness, faithfulness and loving gestures as a sign of weakness. I"m not sure about that, but they see it as a lack of a challenge, meaning no drama, so it bores them. I've actually known women well enough where they will admit a guy treating them is boring, and that they'd rather be with a guy who is sometimes abusive, because there's more drama.
lorangie1 Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 I"m not sure about that, but they see it as a lack of a challenge, meaning no drama, so it bores them. I've actually known women well enough where they will admit a guy treating them is boring, and that they'd rather be with a guy who is sometimes abusive, because there's more drama. I don't think ANY woman wants an abusive man. Aloof can be seen as cool, sexy INITIALLY but all women want gushy love and affection and LOTS of it from the man they want. If they say a guy treating them well is "boring," then they are not that into the guy. No woman would ever want to be treated in a cool regard by a man they are seriously interested in. Ask any woman.
Pedigree Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 But do you understand the majority of women are insecure, especially the more attractive ones? It's very, very sad but it's also reality. Sorry to divert from the topic, but why do you think that is? You'd think that the more attractive the more confident they'll be in themselves.
D-Jam Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 I can believe a lot of women will more be attracted to the guy they can't "get easily". Too many now have been "trained" to believe that interest equates to "needy" or "desperate". I even told a girl once when she described this guy who was totally into her as "needy and desperate" (when he wasn't) that she must think really little of herself if she would believe someone has to be needy and/or desperate to be interested in her. So many (not all) women see lack of interest as attractive, manly, mysterious, etc...and yet they see interest as needy, desperate, and unattractive. Thus they chase Mr Hard-To-Get... ...then bitch and complain later how he won't drop everything for her and how he won't regularly stay in communication. Granted he's doing what he originally did, but she wanted him to NOW change to someone who is "more interested" and "more attentive". Boggles the mind. Even worse is men do this crap too!
betamanlet Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 I can believe a lot of women will more be attracted to the guy they can't "get easily". Too many now have been "trained" to believe that interest equates to "needy" or "desperate". I even told a girl once when she described this guy who was totally into her as "needy and desperate" (when he wasn't) that she must think really little of herself if she would believe someone has to be needy and/or desperate to be interested in her. So many (not all) women see lack of interest as attractive, manly, mysterious, etc...and yet they see interest as needy, desperate, and unattractive. Thus they chase Mr Hard-To-Get... ...then bitch and complain later how he won't drop everything for her and how he won't regularly stay in communication. Granted he's doing what he originally did, but she wanted him to NOW change to someone who is "more interested" and "more attentive". Boggles the mind. Even worse is men do this crap too! I actually got a girl like that. I showed interest in her, she had low self esteem so she thought there was something wrong with me, and pushed me away. I talked to her, told her exactly what she was doing, and she wasn't even conscioiusly aware of it. I said "you think lowly of yourself, and you see pursuing you, therefore something must be wrong with betamanlet". I just said I feel comfortable around her and that she's cool, I don't like her issues though. And then she gave me a chance.
norajane Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 You can interpret that as you have no interest in women who are interested in you, and you are interested in women who have no interest in you. That happens to a LOT of people. It's often a sign of having intimacy issues - you subconsciously won't allow people in who actually want in. And you pursue people who will never let you in. It's also 3 examples of how women DO pursue men, contrary to so many posts on this board about how women don't pursue men and don't ask them out. They just have to actually be interested in you to do so.
betamanlet Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 You can interpret that as you have no interest in women who are interested in you, and you are interested in women who have no interest in you. That happens to a LOT of people. It's often a sign of having intimacy issues - you subconsciously won't allow people in who actually want in. And you pursue people who will never let you in. It's also 3 examples of how women DO pursue men, contrary to so many posts on this board about how women don't pursue men and don't ask them out. They just have to actually be interested in you to do so. Well, women with intimacy issues will pursue married men. Because they are emotionally unavailable.
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