conehead Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Sorry for the lame title haha. Anyway, so I met this guy online through eharmony. We've gone through the whole eharmony process and did open communication exchaning emails for a total of 2 weeks. He asked to meet in person for the first time this Saturday, and I agreed and suggested we talk on the phone before meeting up. I gave him my number and he called me on Monday and we had a nice chat and set up the time/location of our meeting. We've exchanged emails since then and his last email to me last night it ended with 'I hope you will have a great day at work and p lease feel free to call me anytime ' So I suppose my question is, should I call him tonight or not. I mean we are meeting for the first time on Saturday anyway. If I don't call, how should I address it (if at all) in my next email to him? Dating is so complicated.
Yukikazi Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 If you want to call him.. call him If you don't.. then don't.. Stop over thinking it and either do it or don't.. You will only get 2 answers to this.. do it or don't In the end its still down to you if you call or not.
Ms. Joolie Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 No! Don't call him! He invited you two meet on Saturday. You accepted. You suggested you two talk on the phone. It happened. Now just relax until he gets in contact with you about Saturday's date. Relax!
xpaperxcutx Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 You know, when Bell invented the telephone, it was one of the biggest stories of the century. It was convenient for everyone, to communicate over long distances. 100 years later, however, we're not really doing him justice are we? Pick up your phone and call him.
stevejohnson1976 Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Being a dude, I would say no, dont call. I'm doing the SAME thing you are now (online dating, meeting for first time, etc), so i can relate... Make him WONDER. It will drive him crazy. Trust me, I know. I would wait until Sat to call. I bet you he will call you before then...
Author conehead Posted December 17, 2009 Author Posted December 17, 2009 Thanks for everyone's input! You know, I figure since I will see him in person on Saturday anyway and we already talked once on the phone, like MsJoolie and stevejohnson said, I don't see the point in talking on the phone again. That being said, I plan to reply to his email since we've been exchaning emails since Monday's phone chat. How should I reply to it? Should I say 'I hope you have a great day too and you may call me at any time as well! I look forward to seeing you soon this Saturday =).' ?? We've already established a time/location to meet back on Monday
stevejohnson1976 Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Thanks for everyone's input! You know, I figure since I will see him in person on Saturday anyway and we already talked once on the phone, like MsJoolie and stevejohnson said, I don't see the point in talking on the phone again. That being said, I plan to reply to his email since we've been exchaning emails since Monday's phone chat. How should I reply to it? Should I say 'I hope you have a great day too and you may call me at any time as well! I look forward to seeing you soon this Saturday =).' ?? We've already established a time/location to meet back on Monday leave out the "you may call me part"...dont seem to desperate. men LOVE the chase..i know...because i am a man. it drives me crazy. the girls that are easy to catch, we gte bored with quickly. make him pursue you!!! Please trust me.
Ms. Joolie Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 I agree with Steve, leave out that one part and you're good to go.
stevejohnson1976 Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 I agree with Steve, leave out that one part and you're good to go. 'Steve' is just my stage name
Ichi-boned Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 Sorry for the lame title haha. Anyway, so I met this guy online through eharmony.I'm sorry.
harmfulsweetz Posted December 17, 2009 Posted December 17, 2009 I don't think head games are necessary. If you want to call him, call him. Why not be straight up and yourself? If you don't call him, under the illusion it will send him crazy, in fact, you could be disillusioning him with you. Show him you are interested. Do it, or don't do it. Depends how you feel. If you want to call him, do it. If not, don't. Don't not call him because you want to send him crazy though, it's silly playing games and unnecessary.
Yukikazi Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 Steve telling her we like the chase.. us telling others to get her to chase him.. round and round we go...
stevejohnson1976 Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 Steve telling her we like the chase.. us telling others to get her to chase him.. round and round we go... so you think if she calls him that will improve her case or chances??? she has made it more than obvious she digs him. Let is simmer a little. Make him wonder a LITTLE. Its not im saying never call and just sit back...you just cant show him you are too available. Thats not attractive...sorry, its not. I have dated close to 10 women the past month...you know who the ones are that i'm still interested in? the ones who made me chase THEM. I doubt im the only one who feels this way...i would say 99% of us guys do.
viz Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 I love it when people call me and I'm a guy. "The Game" sucks. People should just do what they feel like doing. If I'm in communication with someone and they call me, it confirms to me that they are interested. If I'm doing all of the calling it makes me think they aren't interested. I'm not desperate and I'm not going act like I am. I'm happy to make almost all of the calls, but you have to throw me a bone once in a while or I'm audi. Guys like to know you are interested. If I've called someone lots of times, and they never call me, I move on. I don't have a set rule about it but no effort = "I'm not interested, leave me alone", in my book. I usually give it 2 weeks before moving on. Then again, I'm not exactly Mr. Smooth Dater guy either so I may not be the best person to give advice. So far this has served me well, I think lol.
Ms. Joolie Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 It's not a game to suggest she not call him. No head games, just a suggested course of action.... you gotta do something (or not), and she came on here to weigh her options. If they've been emailing everyday, they have been in constant communication. There is no reason for her to call first. He's asking her out, and he should call to follow up on that. If a guy asked me out via email, I'd expect him to set that up with me. I thought it was great that she suggested they talk on the phone first, and they did. I don't think she should have to ask for another phone call, or have to take that initiative. IMO, it's his time to call and set up the date, unless he just does that by email. Let him call and arrange the first date. Calling on him first wouldn't be attractive imo.
Yukikazi Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 I love it when people call me and I'm a guy. I agree with this.. give us a hint here ladies.. don't expect every guy to be able to read you perfectly.. we do like to know that the interest is reciprocated.. I also move on once I notice I'm doing all the initiating of communication.. My preference is the girl chase me.. guess I'm weird that way..
O'Malley Posted December 18, 2009 Posted December 18, 2009 his last email to me last night it ended with 'I hope you will have a great day at work and p lease feel free to call me anytime ' I'd usually hedge against calling after a date's been planned. Unless you've already sent an email reply, in this case I think it would be OK to call him -- just keep the conversation light and brief 'just calling to confirm the time/place we scheduled.' Also not a bad idea, if the date goes well, to start making phone calls the primary mode of contact, rather than emails or texts. Just keep it balanced -- very few people want to receive a multitude of calls/emails/texts over a span of a few days.
Author conehead Posted December 18, 2009 Author Posted December 18, 2009 Ok so I did email him back yesterday afternoon with what I had put in my last post. I did include the 'and you may call me anytime as well' line just to be nice since he wrote that in his last email. And just to clarify, we actually already had the date set back on Monday so he wasn't telling me to call him to set a date, but rather just to chat. Anyway, he did end up calling me last night just to say hi and chat for a bit. My feeling is that he wanted to talk on the phone and he only asked me to call him anytime I want just because he wasnt' sure if I was ok with talking on the phone again for a second time. Once I gave him the ok, he went ahead and called me. I think that is the case thought I may be wrong....
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