stayingstrong12 Posted December 13, 2009 Posted December 13, 2009 Lately, i've been thinking about my ex boyfriend a lot. We broke up in June and weve spoked once since then and lately hes just been on my mind!! ughh why,i dont get it..i thought no contact would get me over him faster and not have to think about him but it seems like he is all ithink about.. and...also i always bring up ..how long are him and his rebound girl gonna last for and blah blah blah and i know i shouldnt care!! so idk why the hell i do..i just know shes not right for him and i know it wont last.. i just want him to come around and eventually talk to me..even if its just as friends.. how do i get him off my mind!!
LovelyDaze Posted December 13, 2009 Posted December 13, 2009 Let me ask you this, what have you been doing TO forget about him?
Author stayingstrong12 Posted December 13, 2009 Author Posted December 13, 2009 i went back to school to finish my degree and ive been with friends and family...but hes just still on my mind.
LovelyDaze Posted December 13, 2009 Posted December 13, 2009 I know it's hard because we all are on here trying to make sense of our breakups too. Sorry to say this but you do need to keep up NC. The thing about No Contact is not necessarily to first get over your ex but to keep your integrity and get used to life without your former significant other. We will all never forget our exes but you CAN start on leaving him in June of 2009. Tell yourself that he is not coming back. Get to the lowest you can go so that your heart and mind will grow into the fact that your life has no choice but to move forward. Don't dramatize your time with him either, remember the reason why it ended in the first place.
Author stayingstrong12 Posted December 13, 2009 Author Posted December 13, 2009 aw wow thanks so much, ill def not talk to him ever..unless he talks to me but i would never try and contact him again because its pointless cuz he'll either answer and be mean or dont answer at all, but ill def keep doing what im doing and remember all the bad things hes did instead of the good memories.
Boundary Problem Posted December 13, 2009 Posted December 13, 2009 If you really want to move on, just start dating someone else. That always works for me.
trueblue72ny Posted December 13, 2009 Posted December 13, 2009 (edited) hey stayingstrong12, sorry you are going thru this emotional battle. it is exhausting, i know. its drained the life out of me too. everyone is different but i am thinking maybe the only way to get him off your mind is to get someone else on your mind. ya know? that is basically the only way i was able to lessen the thoughts of my ex gf. my thoughts would always drift back to her if i didnt have someone else to occupy that space. i still do think about her, several months later, but having someone else to think about helps alleviate that. granted i work with mine so its difficult, Especially when she purposely tries to get my attention, (that tugs at me) but it definately helped when i decided to start trying to meet new people. my two cents. Edited December 13, 2009 by trueblue72ny
Author stayingstrong12 Posted December 13, 2009 Author Posted December 13, 2009 he broke up with me and then like 3 weeks later started dating someone else cuz he hates being alone, but i didnt wanna do that and jump into another relationship when i knew it wouldnt work out and would just be a rebound..but ive been trying to meet new ppl
bluesky123 Posted December 13, 2009 Posted December 13, 2009 Stay strong and stick to NC, I've been NC since June as well. I'm a dumpee too. The most important thing right now is yourself, its his loss. I too want to talk with my ex, but when you really think about what are you going to say ? I heard a quote the other day, "why worry, you'll never know anyways".
LovelyDaze Posted December 13, 2009 Posted December 13, 2009 "why worry, you'll never know anyways". True. We dumpees usually don't want to know WHY it happened....we just want things the way they used to be. Sad thing is....it can't.
deebeechrisyo Posted December 13, 2009 Posted December 13, 2009 True. We dumpees usually don't want to know WHY it happened....we just want things the way they used to be. Sad thing is....it can't. I agree with this somewhat. I still have nagging thoughts in the back of my mind, wanting to understand the real reason for why it happened. But I know what you mean about wanting things the way they used to be. What helps me is knowing that my next relationship will be even better then the way things used to be.
Author stayingstrong12 Posted December 14, 2009 Author Posted December 14, 2009 you guys are all right, thanks so much. and it is his loss cuz i know no one would ever put up with what i put up with from him and he'll realize sooner or later what he had..maybe still not now since hes with someone new but when they break up..hes gonna wonder and by that time i hope ive already moved on with someone else
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