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5 Month Update


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Posted

Some days I am, some days not. I am often basing my mood on how he seems and how he is with me. Not good.

I think you may well heal more quickly than me because you have NC.

I am seeing him this eve and may well come crashing down, again.

 

 

Sounds like you are doing much better HoH.
Posted

 

I did not cheat, lie, abuse or neglect. We fought a lot, and I started most of the fights over stupid things. I let stupid stuff get to me. I'm an irritable person and can be short-tempered...on the other hand I was very affectionate and possibly too needy. I'm a mess, I know!

 

 

/QUOTE]

 

Your situation sounds exactly like mine. You sound exactly how I was in the relationship, needy, irritable, short tempered. I never lied or cheated either. I was the cause of most of the fights, but not all of them. I think you have to forgive yourself for your mistakes eventually but you have to know that it takes two to argue, so I'm sure it was never ALL your fault. It's still extremely hard though when you know you could've been so much better in the relationship and now you want a second chance but it's too late.

Posted

Do you think living together caused more problems for your relationship. than it helped and how long were things good in your relationship.

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Posted

 

I did not cheat, lie, abuse or neglect. We fought a lot, and I started most of the fights over stupid things. I let stupid stuff get to me. I'm an irritable person and can be short-tempered...on the other hand I was very affectionate and possibly too needy. I'm a mess, I know!

 

 

/QUOTE]

 

Your situation sounds exactly like mine. You sound exactly how I was in the relationship, needy, irritable, short tempered. I never lied or cheated either. I was the cause of most of the fights, but not all of them. I think you have to forgive yourself for your mistakes eventually but you have to know that it takes two to argue, so I'm sure it was never ALL your fault. It's still extremely hard though when you know you could've been so much better in the relationship and now you want a second chance but it's too late.

 

Thank you Katie, it sounds like you know where I'm coming from. Personally, I think I was childish. That's the best way to describe it.

 

I do need to forgive myself.

 

It's so hard to let go when you don't know what else is out there, you know? Maybe I screwed up my only chance...

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Posted
Do you think living together caused more problems for your relationship. than it helped and how long were things good in your relationship.

 

Well, I don't think I could just date someone for 5 years without living together, so it's sort of an unanswerable question. I think things would have ended either way. In fact, if we didn't live together, things may have ended sooner.

 

How long were things good? If I had just been calm, mature, and more relaxed, then things would have always been good; she always treated me well. Because of my temperament I would say fighting was a little too much after two years.

 

But like I said, I was content, I loved her, I would have worked on things FOREVER. I couldn't let go of her because I loved her so much.

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