W/H's, How would you feel if everything your H/W told you was a lie??

[hopeless4u]

If you had 'the talk' about not being happy in you M and you asked your H if he had met someone and he said no, you trust him so believe him. You go to MC, do most of the things he has asked to try to improve the M. Things are still not good so you say to him maybe he should move out for a bit and get his head together, he breaks down, sobbing like a child, telling you he does love you but he's confused, still you don't understand why he is feeling like this but carry on trying to work on the M.

 

How would you feel if after all this you found out he'd been having an affair for the last 2 yrs and claims to be in love with the OW?

[imagine]

Hopeless4u,

 

Generally, the rules are this : "a wandering spouse always lies",

A WS says the same excuses for wandering,

Put the same blame on you for the relationship,

Respond in the same way to action.

 

This is why we are so competent in dealing with WS's - we've heard it all before!

 

We just battle a bit getting the BS's to understand.

[hopeless4u]

Hopeless4u,

 

Generally, the rules are this : "a wandering spouse always lies",

A WS says the same excuses for wandering,

Put the same blame on you for the relationship,

Respond in the same way to action.

 

This is why we are so competent in dealing with WS's - we've heard it all before!

 

We just battle a bit getting the BS's to understand.

 

I still don't get it.

 

Its taking every bit of strength I have not to just ring her up and tell her!!

How dare HE think HE can keep her in their M because it suits HIM.

 

He says that if his W knew she would leave him and it would break her, I think yes she would leave him but it is him who would be broken!!

 

She deserves better.

[LisaUk]

Sorry, I don't think I understand you, are you the OW or the wife?

[LisaUk]

Just checked out your back threads. So your the OW (ex OW) and you are surprised that the guy is a rat? REALLY?

[hopeless4u]

Just checked out your back threads. So your the OW (ex OW) and you are surprised that the guy is a rat? REALLY?

 

No, not surprised anymore, just beginning to feel the anger.

 

I posted on here to understand and I know he reads my posts so maybe some of the answers could make him see sense. I know most will think I'm bitter but it was me who ended things and partly because of the way his W is being mislead and obviously because he is still in his M.

[tnttim]

I can't believe anyone on this forum, or planet has not realized this yet. Every last person on this earth, live or dead, is a liar. If you say you don't lie, then your a liar in denial. It's human nature to lie. We lie to bandage our fragile little feelings, or someone elses. Your spouse lies about the OW/OM to save your feelings, and theirs. Neither of you can face your true feelings about each other. Communication is the #1 relationship buster. Either way, too much communication, or too little. Where's the line? I'll tell you when I find it.

[tnttim]

No, not surprised anymore, just beginning to feel the anger.

 

I posted on here to understand and I know he reads my posts so maybe some of the answers could make him see sense. I know most will think I'm bitter but it was me who ended things and partly because of the way his W is being mislead and obviously because he is still in his M.

 

You still love him, it's obvious by your posts.

[dgiirl]

No, not surprised anymore, just beginning to feel the anger.

 

I posted on here to understand and I know he reads my posts so maybe some of the answers could make him see sense. I know most will think I'm bitter but it was me who ended things and partly because of the way his W is being mislead and obviously because he is still in his M.

 

In other words, you ended things with him because he wasn't leaving his wife for you?

 

You want him to see sense? You're both scum.

[hopeless4u]

You still love him, it's obvious by your posts.

 

Yes I do still love him and probably always will but I really don't like him very much at the moment.

 

I wish I could just switch my feelings off but thats not gonna happen but I am beginning to see him for what he really is.

[nobmagnet]

why dont you boil your head??

 

actually you deseve each other. both lying cheeting selfish crappy people.

 

Do you think you should be the one?? hahahah hey love, he knows you have no honour/respect why the hell would he chose you over a loving respectable wife???

 

to have an affairre with a married man is the lowest form of human evilness.

 

Me............yes call me bitter, call me blaming my hurt on you but rest assured you are scum and I do hope you know you are.