bentnotbroken Posted December 16, 2009 Posted December 16, 2009 I am actually living in the house with MW and H. I hear it!! They become more discrete once they realized how much their sounds carried. I appreciated that at first but lately I have found myself listening for it, and positioning myself to hear. I think to confirm that he doesn't satisfy her like I do. I can't seem to help myself. Am the only one who finds this extremely perverted and sick:sick:?
Jacky Posted December 16, 2009 Posted December 16, 2009 Hi otherman. You may not want to hear my answer to your post but yes I do think you are being naieve ( not stupid). Part of being married is being intimate i.e having sex with your partner. If your MW wants to keep her affair with you a secret then she needs to keep up appearances within her marriage and unfortunately for you this means she will still be satisfying her husband. Don't see it as a negative...think of it as her way of protecting what she has with you?? I am not making any judgements about what is right or wrong. That's not why I come to LS. Just offering my opinion. And support too. I know how you feel. Don't be naieve enough to think she will cut off her sexual relationship with her H just because you asked. Would you do the same if the shoe was on the other foot? Very well put, I had the same problems regarding to thinking that the person I am in love with is in bed with another person. At times it bugs me but maybe she is doing it to protect the A
Jacky Posted December 16, 2009 Posted December 16, 2009 yes...really...balls because very very few actually leave the M regardless of legitimate reasons or not...trust me there plenty of reasons for mr to suck it up and stay...but I wanted happiness...I chose happiness...Ienever said black and white...of course there is plenty of gray... it takes a strong person to leave... Good for you, I wish my MW would do the same thing too instead of sucking it up and staying...
Samantha0905 Posted December 16, 2009 Posted December 16, 2009 Does the MW or MM tell you they won't do it? I asked mine not too, and I believe her when she tells me she doesn't? Am I being stupid or is this ok to believe? Anyways, just curious how others deal with the thoughts? Hi otherman. You may not want to hear my answer to your post but yes I do think you are being naieve ( not stupid). Part of being married is being intimate i.e having sex with your partner. If your MW wants to keep her affair with you a secret then she needs to keep up appearances within her marriage and unfortunately for you this means she will still be satisfying her husband. Don't see it as a negative...think of it as her way of protecting what she has with you?? I am not making any judgements about what is right or wrong. That's not why I come to LS. Just offering my opinion. And support too. I know how you feel. Don't be naieve enough to think she will cut off her sexual relationship with her H just because you asked. Would you do the same if the shoe was on the other foot? I can only speak for myself, but I did not have sex with my husband throughout my affair -- just as I told my AP. In fact, we still haven't had sex since I've moved back home and my husband hasn't approached me for sex. It's been since this past May, I believe. I honestly wonder if my husband doesn't know I've had an affair. He certainly would be the type to have me followed by a private detective. I know when his brother was going through a divorce, he suggested to him to have a P.I. follow the WW. Perhaps it will be brought up after the holidays. I don't know.
OWW Posted December 16, 2009 Posted December 16, 2009 Am the only one who finds this extremely perverted and sick:sick:? Thanks for the support... It's not something I'm proud of. But it certainly seemed an applicable situation to the question about wondering if they ever do, to knowing that they do. That, yes, to the person who wonders, not only do I wonder, but I know.
torranceshipman Posted December 16, 2009 Posted December 16, 2009 Very well put, I had the same problems regarding to thinking that the person I am in love with is in bed with another person. At times it bugs me but maybe she is doing it to protect the A Ah what a woman, making such terrible sacrifices, to protect her A, must be tough :D
Spark1111 Posted December 16, 2009 Posted December 16, 2009 My husband's OW asked point blank if he and I were having sex. He told her rarely to never. She convinced him I must have a lover on the side, too! He believed her. We made love at least once a week during the affair. I guess people believe what they want to believe, or NEED to believe. Sometimes lovers may tell the truth of their marital situation. Othertimes, no, surely they don't. Only you can determine for yourself what may be true in your situation.
BED OF ROSES Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 Do you ever let you mind wonder into that horrible place where all you think about is your MW or MM in bed with there H or W? ~ NO How do you deal with it? ~ N/A SEE ABOVE Does the MW or MM tell you they won't do it? NO THAT WOULD BE RIDICULOUS AS WHAT HE DOES WITH HIS WIFE IS NONE OF MY CONCERN I asked mine not too, and I believe her when she tells me she doesn't? Am I being stupid or is this ok to believe? YES YOU ARE BEING STUPID OR A BETTER WORD MIGHT BE NAIVE Anyways, just curious how others deal with the thoughts? I NEVER HAVE THOSE THOUGHTS SO THERE IS NOTHING FOR ME TO DEAL WITH. Thanks, Other Man Hope that helps.
Lizzie60 Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 Another great idea! If you can't persuade yourself that they aren't having sex, at least take comfort in the belief that they're probably not enjoying it. Oh I'm sure he's enjoying it.. he said he just need to close his eyes and pretend he's making love to me.. and he's not the only one who told me they fantasize about me while they were having sex with their W... It's not that uncommon... especially when the sex is robotic and boring..
Impudent Oyster Posted December 22, 2009 Posted December 22, 2009 . and he's not the only one who told me they fantasize about me while they were having sex with their W... It's not that uncommon... especially when the sex is robotic and boring.. So you've had sex with their wives too?!?!?!?!? Otherwise, how would you know what it's like?
FairShake Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 I'm a MW involved with a SG. I have not had sex with my husband since we became involved. I have told my husband I want a divorce.
Recommended Posts